My birthday post
It’s my birthday. I’m going to give a gift to myself today. I’m going to post five posts that make me happy. I hope you will like reading them. I hope you haven’t read all of them already.
Also, maybe in the comments section, you will post your favorite post back to me. And tell me why it makes you happy. That would be a good gift.
Top Ten Jobs to Have, April 2006
I like this one because it is one of the first posts I did. It reminds me that each time I’ve tried something new I have been tentative, and largely terrible at it. This is not really a post as much as a start of a post. But I like the last line.
My financial history, and stop whining about your job, March 2007
My personal finances have been sort of a wreck since about 2001. It’s very scary to have a messy financial life. It’s even scarier to be a career advisor in a financial mess. I was so scared, all the time, that people would find out and then hate me. So it was a huge relief to write this post and come clean about who I am, and how I got here. And there were absolutely no negative ramifications from writing this post. It taught me so much about the value of being who I am, and trusting that it will be okay to be me.
Gen X updates outdated work and family goals, September 2007
I don’t write a lot about gen X. Because I have a company that is an anthem to generation Y, but also because everyone who is not gen X hates hearing about gen X. We’re a generation that has nothing to lose, so we take huge risks all the time. In history, it is the marginal, overlooked, overshadowed generations that are revolutionary. That’s how I know that history will mark gen -X as the real revolutionaries of this era. And this post collects the data I have running through my head to support this conclusion.
Try to be funny, even if you’re not, March 2008
It took me so long to realize that I have Asperger Syndrome. It was a result of lots of tiny little pieces of information piling up. One of them was after this post. I lamented the fact that I was funny but men don’t like funny, they like hot. And my friend told me, “You’re not funny. I mean, you are, but you don’t know when you are.” At first I thought this was informative because now I could just focus on being hot. But really, it was informative because it’s true that I am never really sure when something’s funny.
Tips for coping when your startup is out of cash, May 2009
I remember this day so clearly. I thought I was going to die from the pressure I was under, and I felt so totally isolated in a room full of parents with overachiever violin students. I wondered if they could tell I was falling apart. I wondered if my son thought I looked like other parents. The only way to keep myself sane that day was to write the post as the post was happening. It makes me happy that I have a place to publish something like this.
People ask me all the time how they can get more readers to their blog. The answer is that you have to be learning on your blog. If you’re not learning, no one else is learning. You can’t fake it. It’s safe to talk about what you know, but it’s not that interesting; no one likes a know-it-all. My favorite posts are the one’s when I was doing something scary, but doing it with grace. In fact, I actually think those are my favorite times of life.
This is my favorite:
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2001/09/12/first-hand-account-of-911/
because you survived and it was how I re-found you.
This is my second favorite:
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/03/05/my-name-is-not-really-penelope/
because it makes me remember how long we have known each other.
Happy Birthday
Oh god, I can’t believe we’re this deep in the comments until The Name post came up! Yes, that’s a great one.
Hi, Penelope. I’ve been reading your blog for two years and this is my first comment. I’ve thought of adding a comment before, but didn’t want to put myself out there. Today’s your birthday, though, so in honor of your putting yourself out there for the benefit of all of us, here goes: my favorite post of yours is the abortion post. My second-favorite is your recent introvert post. They both just spoke directly to me and I’m really grateful that you wrote them. I hope you have a wonderful day!
Thanks, Deborah. You deciding to comment for the first time is a good gift. I hope you’ll comment more. We can’t have a whole comment section full of extroverts :)
Penelope
Happy Birthday!
Here are a few favorites:
1. The post about how travel is overrated.
2. All the posts where you discuss office politics and explain it’s all about being likable. This helped me a lot because I always feared there was some mysterious office politics knowledge out there that everyone else knew, and really, there wasn’t.
3. The post about why you are difficult in meetings. It was so well written. I hope that maybe your son’s teacher read it and understood you (and your son) a little better.
I’ve found your website for about two months ago, my two favorite posts are the one about self-discipline and how you lost 20 lbs in two months before your speaking tour.
Oh. I never link to that one about losing 20 pounds. I always forget.
Here’s my favorite part:
This is what my agent said three days after I delivered the baby: "I don't mean to be harsh, but you look terrible.”
This is what my husband said two days later: "The stress of you having to lose so much weight so quickly will kill us both. Give back the money you got for the book.”
Here’s the link:
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2005/08/22/big-goals-require-big-plans-losing-weight-after-pregnancy/
And thanks for reminding me about that!
Penelope
Happy birthday P!
I have lots of favourite posts but the best one is the one you wrote about deciding how much to reveal about yourself.
The writing was so clear and honest, it was great.
I am happy that you are giving yourself a great birthday!
My favorite posts are those about the “Do who you are” mantra. They always encourage me when I cannot make decisions.
Also, your latest post is always my favorite post, when I am reading it.
Happy Birthday! I love you!
Happy birthday! Or something. I always hated it when I was in a bad space in life and people were wishing me happy birthday. So, I hope you don’t hate it, and I hope you do have some happy in your birthday this year.
A favorite post of yours for me is: http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2008/04/10/advice-from-the-top-marry-a-stay-at-home-spouse-or-buy-the-equivalent/
Thanks for the link to the Gen X post — I really like what you had to say.
Hope you enjoy your birthday!
Happy Birthday. My favorite post because it’s sexy and provocative at the same time: http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/03/09/when-women-get-power-at-work-do-they-use-it-like-men-do/
Your horoscope: Even if you’ve got little authority, people still look to you for answers, especially on days like today. Your quick mind should bust out with everything that’s needed, even if folks don’t agree at first.
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/12/18/bad-career-advice-do-what-you-love/
This was the first post that I read on your blog, and it is still my favorite. I was very discouraged about my job search and kept getting that exact advice. It was a refreshing change to read and I found that once I stopped looking for the perfect job to make my life better, I found a great one. But the great thing about my life now is that it is things outside of work that make my life great. Thank you for helping me make that connection, I hope you have a wonderful birthday! Thank you for having the courage to be so candid in your posts, it touches more people thank you know.
Once, I compiled this list for my friends in an e-mail string about career. Some of the stuff, I agree with you but in one of the posts I did not. Ha!
I called it “must reads.”
And my good friend said, “Now you’re convincing me to quit my job . . .” And he has a new and better one now. :)
Paste…this is how I described your posts to my friends:
Get out of a career when you’re done doing it:
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/07/13/sarah-palins-resignation-inspires-me/
Don’t try to dodge the recession with grad school, it’s pointless
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/02/03/dont-try-to-dodge-the-recession-with-grad-school/
Don’t wait until you bottom out to make a career change
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2003/04/28/dont-wait-until-you-bottom-out-to-make-a-big-change/
Don’t frame your career around fun versus not-fun jobs. (I pretty much disagree with her on a lot of this):
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/07/20/how-to-feel-steady-in-a-shaky-economy/
Make your life more stable by changing jobs frequently (this is REALLY good, advises against MBA)
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/07/13/2007/02/25/make-your-life-more-stable-by-changing-jobs-more-frequently/
Forget about the soul search, just do something (recommends trying out different careers because no job will match ALL your strengths. Also says to trust your resilience to survive, rather than you THINK you’ll feel)
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/05/15/forget-the-soul-search-just-do-something/
What work traits will make you happy?
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/01/16/the-connection-between-a-good-job-and-happiness-is-overrated/
Nine biggest workplace myths
http://blog.guykawasaki.com/2007/05/the_nine_bigges.html
Studies show it only takes $40,000 per year to be happy
http://blog.guykawasaki.com/2007/05/ten_questions_w.html
People in their 20s change jobs every 18 months, frequent changes maintains passion
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/12/24/good-news-for-job-hoppers-frequent-change-maintains-passion/
New American dream: Success is not having more things than your parents, it’s having more time
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/06/26/how-to-reach-the-new-american-dream/
Is Grad school right for you?
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2005/08/01/is-grad-school-right-for-you/
Five steps to a new life
http://finance.yahoo.com/expert/article/careerist/30949
Don’t expect to change careers and be elated
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2004/06/09/checklist-for-career-change/
Gen-Y changes careers more often, unlike baby boomers who waited until midlife crisis
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/05/12/how-to-recognize-bad-advice-about-work/
I CANT believe nobody has mentioned this one yet. I hadnt become fully emersed in your blog PROBABLY until this day. You had me laughing in the quiet office space above my lab -out loud the entire time I read this:
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/04/13/i-hate-david-dellifield-the-one-from-ada-ohio/
Not only did you do something that the rest of us wish we could do – publicly confront a completely ignorant know-it -all, but you confronted someone who thought they could judge another without consequence. Kudos, and thanks for the laugh.
Most memorable?
Here's another idea, David. How about approaching all those guys with Blackberries at soccer games? Let me ask you something. Do those guys check their email when they're getting a blow job? Of course not. Do you know why? Because it's INTERESTING
that quote. Love it. Ive also introduced MANY friends to your column via that article alone.
Happy Birthday!!!!
Happy Birthday! My birthday is actually tomorrow.
This is my first of many visits to your blog so I have a lot of catching up to do. Enjoy your day!!
Happy Birthday!!!
Favorites: the one about the mental ward, the one with your kid’s violin lessons, the one where you decide what to reveal on your blog, and this old one which I think is a gem and I bookmarked to re-read anytime I think I’m too “busy”: http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2003/10/23/dont-tell-me-youre-busy/
Happy birthday!
Happy Birthday!
I just wanted to say thank you for such a wonderful blog. I just recently stumbled upon it and have enjoyed going over old posts. I consider myself socially inept and am fairly new to the workforce. I really appreciate your candid advice. It has been very helpful.
I look forward to future posts.
Elisa
Happy Birthday, Penelope! I hope you treated yourself to some extra helpings of your gas station coffee.
You asked us to pick our favorites, but all your posts are always well thought out and always offer something new to think about, which is why I keep coming back. If I had to pick two, these are the ones:
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/11/15/stop-worrying-that-your-twentysomething-is-lost/
This is a post I always read when I freak out about my career, and being a 20-something with no direction. It never fails to calm me down and put things in perspective.
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/12/04/theres-no-magic-pill-for-being-lost/
This one really touched me. I wanted to comment but I wanted to make sure I said something heartfelt and really genuine, and I was so nervous that I couldn’t, so I never ended up saying anything.
Oh! I forgot about the abortion post as well. It really hit home why I like you so much. You make your decisions and you’re unapologetic. I strive to be that and having a woman role-model who is like that really reminds me that it is possible.
Happy Birthday Penelope!
I love many of your posts since I got hooked about a year ago. I got randomly hooked to your blog one day after a frustrating day at work while I was googling “ROI of time” :)
It’s hard to pick a favorite post. I do keep a list of favorite quotes from your blog posts. Here they are:
1. And every regret I can think of is about self-confidence.
2.Also, it is embarrassing to admit to wanting greatness knowing that there is a risk that I will not achieve it.
3. And our lack of time management comes from a lack of self-discipline which comes from a lack of focus which comes from a lack of knowing the meaning of life.
And we'll never know that. So maybe we should just be happy that we have our lack of focus because that enables our creativity. And we don't know the meaning of life, but we do know that we each get to create our own life, and that, in the end, may be the only guarantee we have.
4. I am sure that the best way to face self-doubt is to push through it
5. Because part of coping with adult life is allowing yourself to want something even if you are not sure you'll get it.
6. The most important piece of self-knowledge is that our problems are not unique.
7. We can go where we can do what we want, how we want. We have to take risks to do that, though. We have to believe in ourselves and our own vision for what's best.
8. Of course, some critics (like that voice inside you telling you to give up) are bad bad bad and you have to turn them off. But don’t turn off all criticism: Mine your critics for people who can help you understand what it is that you do well.
9. People constantly undervalue the return on investment you get from taking risks to invest in your own career.
I also keep a list of quotes I come across through links from your posts, but I digress..:)
Hope you had a great day!
My favorite post is the one I found when I was laid-off from my job and scanning the federal jobs paper at the library!
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/05/11/three-times-you-should-lie-at-work/
You are absolutely spot on about never telling anyone at work if you are pregnant. I myself got a raise because I kept my mouth shut while pregnant with my first child. I also witnessed over the years others who got passed over because they blurted it out practically 5 minutes after they found out they were pregnant.
Sometimes Penelope when I think a post is full of s*** I think back to this post and I know the person who was so perceptive about pregnancy at work must be on to something.
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday Penelope!!!
My favorite post is titled Penelope’s Guide To Blogging. I gave you a rave in my Blogging category along with a hyperlink to the post mentioned above.
I can’t tell you how many people have used that post to get ahead and how much they appreciate you.
Two words for you, the treasure, and that’s all value. Thanks again for moving mountains and making such a dent in the world.
Warmly,
Bill Van Loan
Happy birthday, Penelope! My favourite is ‘5 steps to taming materialism from an accidental expert’. It helps keep me on track.
I love your honesty and I love your blog. Thanks!
Happy Birthday old lady ;)
This is one of my favourites: http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/09/27/five-ways-to-make-yourself-a-workplace-superstar/
I like it as it goes against the traditional career advice and sounds all wrong to others who don’t get it, but it just feels so right for me.
I enjoy your “how to” posts that include steps that I can apply because although I’m good at getting knowledge about what I should be doing I’m not so good at actually taking initiative/action and just doing stuff (plus I love lists)!
Most of you posts are my favourite posts, I find your writing eloquent and precise and beatiful and catchy. Thank you for writing your blog!
The most touching post so far was http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/07/21/how-to-decide-how-much-to-tell-about-yourself-on-your-blog/
Wish you happiness!
Happy Birthday!
I have lots of favorite posts, but this is the one I’ve taken the time to look for and send to people:
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/06/01/get-married-first-then-focus-on-career/
I also think a lot about how being near friends and family is worth $150,000/year, but that’s in a lot of posts.
These posts beg the question: which is more important, a marriage, or family and friends? (A question I am thinking about right now, as you may be.)
Rachel
I find my confidence (and resulting happiness) in your posts on interviewing and salary negotiations. I re-read them before any interview or job-related phone call. Especially this one: http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2008/02/19/the-answer-to-the-toughest-interview-question/
Dear Penelope. I usually read without commenting, but since you asked! I have read you since I was house-hunting in 2002 many moves ago and found your column via Bankrate. I love the combination of truly helpful career advice, leads on positive-psych articles, and your unique writing voice, which has made me come to care about you personally over the years. I wish you a very happy birthday, and hope the sadness you are feeling about the farmer doesn’t overwelm the flavor of your day, though it will of course darken it and make it more complex. I love the chicken-farm column too, but can say that this one truly improved my life:
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2003/08/23/brag-is-not-a-4-letter-word/
I bought this book and was freed from only getting job offers from people who had already worked with me – I was so delighted to learn that interviewing well is a skill you can learn! Thank you so much!
Penelope, just recently started following you. Of the five you posted for your birthday, well, makes me feel better about my life (about as crazy as yours!). Gives me hope that I’ll make it!
I was so psyched to see that we share a birthday Penelope. I am several generations older than you but I feel like we are kindred souls. Reading your blog, I have come to realize that my husband may have Asperger’s and you have given me insight and appreciation for his unique way of looking at the world. I love your work and am rooting for you to win your battles in business and love. You inspire me to be a better person to myself. Peace.
Happy happy birthday! I loved this post: http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/02/03/dont-try-to-dodge-the-recession-with-grad-school/
Very self-affirming. But really, I love the last sentence of this post about what makes a great blog. Sharing learning experiences as you go is key. Otherwise it just sounds like mental masturbation, and that’s when the arrogance sets in.
Thank you for your thought-provoking (and often entertaining)observations. Here’s to many more!
Happy birthday! I love your blog. It’s like potato chips — I can never read just one post. When I first discovered it I spent way too much time reading it. My fave post is this one: the one about hating David Whathisname from Ohio. LOVED it. You gave voice to what I’d been thinking about a lot since I had my daughter.
Thanks!
Happy Birthday Penelope,
I hope this is a great year in your life, and I hope the farmer figures out that being with a smart, courageous woman is hot and will make his life an adventure. I especially liked your blog about Asperbergers. Your blog is thought provoking and always gives me something funny and poignant to ponder.
Cheers!
Luci
Happy Birthday, Penelope! I’m glad to see you asking for presents here. I feel better knowing you are getting support. The replies so far have been so fun! I visualize you crowd surfing, your readers lifting you up and letting you ride the wave.
I found you when helping my husband establish his private practice in mental health counseling. I thought blogging would be a good way for a therapist to let his potential clients get a sense of who he was and whether they’d be able to relate to him comfortably. And I found: http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/05/23/blogging-essential-for-a-good-career/
Now he blogs for our local paper (shameless plug: http://cincinnati.com/blogs/therapy ). Your advice has been a huge confidence booster for me as I prepare to plunge into my own small business. You do a lot of good stuff and I’m not even sure you know the impact of it all. Have a wonderful birthday!
Happy Birthday and thanks for sharing your gift. My favorite post was “How to feel like you have time to read everything”, because it was the first one I read. A friend had passed it along and right away I was captivated by your candor, insight and colorful way with language. Since then, I’m a regular and look forward to your posts everyday (and I don’t tend to read blogs).
Thanks for sharing all you do for the sake of making me think better –
Cindy
http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/05/15/tips-for-coping-when-your-startup-is-out-of-cash/
loved it! loved it! loved it!
I’m going through that phase right now… run a business, support two broke brothers & manage home & a girlfriend!
I get frustrated and then I turn to your blog and say – Hey! She goes through that too! You help me keep my sanity :)
Love,
Mario
P.S.
A belated Happy Birthday, Pen!
Happy birthday! I started reading your posts a little over a year ago and haven’t had time to read the archived ones. So thanks for posting “Gen X updates outdated work and family goals, September 2007.” I missed this one and was so glad to read it. I haven’t had much interest in starting a family because I’m focused on career, but this post made it seem ok to step back and take some time…for kids, for my dogs, for my husband. Thanks!
Happy Birthday, and now this is my favorite post. You’ve probably said it before but “you have to be learning on your blog” just finally penetrated my thick skull. For my business blog, I’m always trying to be buttoned up, edited and certain. Certainly boring, I guess!
Happy Birthday! I’m a newcomer to your blog and enjoyed raeding this list. One of my favorites is “First, be honest about what you want.”
The first few sentences talked about your memory of happiness being your grandparents’ yard, and mine was my grandparents farm. I was also in the midst of making some major life adjustments when reading this blog post and it resonated with me. This is my favorite line:
The trick is to admit what we want, even if we are scared we won't get it. We can only be who we are. And if we are disappointed, later on, well. I guess that's just part of being a grown up and knowing what we want.
Happy Belated Birthday!
Hope it was a good one. I used to think my favorite post was the one about your personal 9/11. It came in close with all the ones about dating the farmer, though, especially the one from first time you met him at the market. Then I just read the one you just re-posted about how to cope when your startup is out of money, and well, it might take the (birthday) cake. Then again, I still really like the 9/11 post. … The point is, it’s always, always, always a delight to read your writing. It is poignant, inspiring, thought-provoking and sometimes even heartbreaking. The best thing about it, though, is that it often makes me laugh out loud and not give a damn who walks by at that moment to see me cackling at my computer screen.
Cheers,
Margaret
Happy belated Birthday! It was also my birthday too yesterday :-)
It’s so refreshing to read your blog, because you write about who you are, without trying to be anything else.
Best wishes!
I recently discovered you and am so inspired by your brave honesty and wit. I’m gearing up to start my own blog and you have been
a real gift. Enjoy your day. In my humble opinion, that farmer is an idiot if he doesn’t choose you over anything.
Happy Belated Birthday. I just read your post in my e-mail.
Hi Penelope,
I have been subscribed to your blog for a few years now.
I am a vocational expert and career counselor, and someone mentioned your blog on a professional listserve. I thought I would find tidbits of career-related advice to pass along to my clients, but I found so much more.
I want to wish you a wonderful birthday, because you never fail to brighten my days. I enjoy all of your posts because you are incredibly authentic and your keen awareness of your experiences is so touching.
I have never commented before, and now I know why. Whenever I link to your comments, I can’t stop reading what others have to say! You are a source of inspiration that I can count on.
The post that stays with me the most is the one about behaving badly on 9/11. I cried for hours after reading that one, because you took us through the horrific trauma with you…and you are such an engaging writer.
I’m grateful that you made it Penelope. We need more people in the world who tell the truth – no matter how painful or embarrassing it may be.
You are a brave lady and you empower me immensely.
Thank you Birthday Girl! Abbe
Penelope;
You are an inspiration to me. That inspiration manifested with in me a determination to blog. Maybe I need this hell
for the change.
http://reinventingrichardsher.blogspot.com/
Richard Sher
.
Happy Birthday Penelope!
My favorite post is “One enchanted evening” at:
My memory of my mother has dimmed, but this post was alive with memory. Remembering makes me happy. It means she was there, and I remember her.
I’m sorry, I guess I didn’t do the html correctly.
here is the URL
http://mosaicmoods.wordpress.com/2009/05/09/one-enchanted-evening/
I like how you’re honoring your birthday–and was dismayed to read in a previous post that your engagement had been called off. I recently read something that said, our relationships aren’t to make us happy, they’re to help us grow . Bet that doesn’t help right now so I’ll move onto your request for favorite posts. Mine is from Twitter, but first I want to say that I’m also glad that you’re asking for what you want on your birthday–focusing in on what makes you happy. Though I don’t have Asperger’s, I prefer my spouse as a confidante–and rarely feel comfortable reaching out to friends as I tend to look “in” rather than “out” for counsel. Anyway, I’m not surprised you’re a fellow Sagittarian (mine’s 12/8)–and via request, here is the post (or tweet) that I most appreciated of yours because of its complete transparency: “I’m in a board meeting. Having a miscarriage. Thank goodness, because there’s a fucked-up 3-week hoop-jump to have an abortion in Wisconsin.”
“post your favorite post back to me. And tell me why it makes you happy”
Uh, oh. I thought you meant “our” favorite post, not yours. Ouch.
Penelope, I have felt that your writing achieved new depth when you met the farmer and allowed yourself to “fall” in love and become “lost”. I have found your writing increasingly non-defensive, especially the Aspergers posts. My personal favorite is the post on introversion. I sent it to my HSP daughter, who can relate, as I can. You’ve got to know that when a boomer (in a traditional profession, nursing) relishes Penelope’s writing and sends posts to her Gen X/Gen Y daughters (I actually don’t much care about the labels or their cut-offs/accuracy) . . . well, it’s a compliment of the highest order! I want my daughters to appreciate your wisdom . . .
Chris