Thanks for this post! I will forward it to some friends.

What is your Myers-Briggs personality?

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ENTJ :)

Good stuff Penelope! I do not love my profession with a deep passion but it enables me to do the things a do love.

I see something similar in tech all the time. "I don't want to work on that software project because it is written in (insert language you don't like). This really just sells you short since for most people it is the end of producing great software that people use that is satisfying, not what language it is written in.

Yeah, whenever I see that, I want to be like: "So who's gonna do all the stuff that isn't fun? Oh, you mean they get paid a lot more money, to entice them to take on those jobs? Doesn't sound bad."

It's a truism in my field (software development) that the unsexy work (gov't contracts, B2B integration) is some of the most lucrative stuff.

And the fun stuff (e.g. video game development) is awful. They underpay, they have mandatory overtime, they treat people like crap and — if they don't like it — there are a hundred other equally-qualified geeks waiting in line to "do what they love."

(Oh, and yoga has been awesome for my sex life. And, no, not by virtue of its fantastic male:female ratio.)

As a new professional struggling to find my way in my chosen career path, it is posts like this that help me to realize that I may actually be going the right direction. Just because I don't always love what I'm doing, doesn't mean that I'm not good at it or that I feel satisfied from the work I do.

I've been a subscriber to your blog for a while, but have just recently started REALLY reading it. I'm glad I have. Excellent insight. You inspired me to buy a book or two (including yours!).

I just stumbled on this great article as well. Somewhat related in that smart people (sounds like an INTP type which I am) tend to hate money. If you look at money as a tool and your job as the means to which produce this tool then it really helps re-frame your perceptions.

http://www.onmoneymaking.com/why-many-smart-people-hate-money-plus-crucial-distinctions.html

Penelope,

Excellent post – right on!

We can't always control our destinies, no matter how hard we try. As a result, we put too much emphasis on landing that dream job or starting a business that nurtures our souls (with all the perceived freedom and success that can provide).

We do, however, have every opportunity and everything we already need to live a dream life.

David

There's a post on a similar topic on Trent's (www.thesimpledollar.com) blog.

Not to sound unpatriotic or anti-American but a lot of American culture is about how you can do anything you want and how the sky's the limit, but those ideas are misleading. The reality is you don't know if you'll like something unless you dive right in and try the job. We should be advocating 20-somethings to just starting working – take a job if it sounds interesting enough – spend less time debating the choices. Who knows what kinds of doors it could open unless you simply try.

I left journalism a year and a half ago and needed a job. I took some random job off craigslist and I didn't know if it would work out. while I don't enjoy my job the industry (international business) itself is fascinating and exciting. and a lot of doors and side jobs have opened up by being in this industry.

the worst that could happen is the job sucks. chalk it up to hindsight and move on to the next job until you're comfortable. as long as you have money to eat and you're close to the people you love, everything else will fall into place.

Thank you for writing what's been on my mind for a while now. I've been struggling with this "find your passion" and "do what you love" language for a couple of years. And I've come to really disbelieve the statement "Do what you love, the money will follow." I've done plenty of things I've loved, and the money stayed far away. I've done many things I've thought were tedious, but the greenbacks appeared in my wallet and bank account. I think we need a total overhaul of this misleading, possibly damaging Success language.

I agree with you 100%. I love web-design, but without money how can I market myself to others to make money designing websites? Instead I found a job as an Internet Marketing Specialist (ironic huh?) especially when I was looking for a basic receptionist job. I love my job and I do try to incorporate what I love into my job (designing banners and site templates for our company blog). I guess I'm one of the lucky ones.

P.S. I agree with the whole sex thing…truth be told people whom do have sex for living don't love sex…LOL!

Samara

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This is a great example of the process to go through to find a job. The thing you love to do is often what you're good at, and somewhere, in the scheme of things, what you're good at, or a piece of what you're good at, is what you can get paid well to do. Finding that intersection is important.

–Penelope

Good post. I would advise young people nowadays to try to get a job and do college at night. Work for a company that gives tuition reimbursement.

Getting early work experience and not getting bogged down by student loans will put someone light years ahead of the game.

This post seems to contradict a lot of things you've written in the past. Seems that you're just trying to gain brownie post since people slam you for 98% of everything else you write. Good job–mission accomplished!

By the way, I agree with Tim, the European.

I think some of the seeming contradiction in this post is simply what is left out – in making the point that "non-love work" can be truly useful, especially if you're spiraling out of control stressing over what you love… You kinda missed the point that for a lot of people, the problem is two-fold: (1) They DON'T know what it is "they love", and (2) They tend to be unhappy in their job.

If you're both of those, you damn well better at least figure out what it is you love, and if that means quitting a job to find out, it'll certainly be worth it.

But, it's also true that, if you can fit your love into those precious few non-work hours, and/or work a job you're well paid for and good at while trying to start up a business based on what you love on the side, that's a damn good thing.

But I strong disagree that you shouldn't TRY to cover expenses doing something you love. Because those that can have an amazing flexibility: they can more easily excuse overwork without feeling too stressed out by it, and/or they can simply work LESS as they get better at doing the job.

Not everyone who loves to cook should work in a kitchen, though. The key is to understand whether or not you CAN do what you love as WORK, or if it MUST be an escape from work. Knowing which of your loves/interests fall into which category is the key.

"The reward for doing a job is contributing to something larger than you are, participating in society, and being valued in the form of money."

I think the above things are all overrated and not that appealing. For me, what matters is the money and what it can buy. If you can find something profitable that you also enjoy doing, then great.

By the way, the MBTI test didn't tell me what I can do, only what I can't do, and I already knew that. I have some of the characteristics of my MBTI type, but I'm not particularly strong in the strengths.

Brilliant.

Before husband/kids, I worked in International Development and really did do what I loved for a few years. I traveled all over! I was making the world a better place!

But when husband/kids came along, doing what I loved became a huge hassle. Who wants to go all around the world when you have a newborn?

So, now I work part-time in a job-share and do what I (mostly) like, in an office that I like, with a boss whom I really like and most importantly – with a schedule that I love.

Now I do volunteer work to fill the "save the world" need and take as many vacations as humanly possible to fill the "travel" need. But what I truly *love* is the flexibility that my current job offers to do these things.

Great post Penelope.
I'm an ENFP. and I love that book. I've talked to you before about wanting to get out of public education, but the funny thing is that according to my personality type, teaching is a good profession for me. LOL.

But apparently so is copywriting, marketing and journalism. I think the underlying commonality here is that in all of these careers you have to be perceptive when it comes to people and you have to be able to communicate effectively. So does this all boil down to the cliché "I'm a people person"?

I absolutely agree with your statement that we are multifaceted and I'll even take it a step further that most of us are good at more than one thing.
A good friend once advised me that teaching takes place in more than just the K-12 classroom. The same can be said for any of your readers' personality traits.

There are 2 kinds of successful people- some who start out very small doing what they love,often working unnoticed for many years. This takes great faith in oneself. The other who follow the tide and let it take them to their riches (quite a few oil tycoons, large retail/hotel chain owners are in this category). Van Gogh never made any money from any of his paintings in his life. Should he have got a well paying job instead of painting ? JK Rowling too would have spent months working on her first book, without having the certainty if it would sell. So sometimes, you need to have the courage to do what you love.

My own experience has been to know which way the river is flowing, and know which way you want to go. Let the river take you as far as it can towards your destination, and jump off and proceed on your own.

Like Joe Grossberg, I loved graphics programming, but there were no well paid jobs in this field, so I compensate by doing this for free (participate in open source projects) in my spare time, and letting my programming skills ( which really are a side effect of my love for graphics) help me make a living !

Guy Kawasaki's blog has some advice on doing what you love as well:

#9 Pursue joy, not happiness.

This is probably the hardest lesson of all to learn. It probably seems to you that the goal in life is to be “happy.” Oh, you maybe have to sacrifice and study and work hard, but, by and large, happiness should be predictable.

Nice house. Nice car. Nice material things.

Take my word for it, happiness is temporary and fleeting. Joy, by contrast, is unpredictable. It comes from pursuing interests and passions that do not obviously result in happiness.

Pursuing joy, not happiness will translate into one thing over the next few years for you: Study what you love.

Penelope, you are SO right! The sure way to make yourself miserable at work is to need way too much from it–identity, validation, AND (whew) pleasure, in addition to money, structure, and skill growth.

I've been astounded for years at the persistence of this "advice" and even more astounded that anyone actually follows it. It ignores reality (both personal and economic) to a degree that is almost cruel.

Great advice (or un-advice). I took the advice to do what you love. Quit my high paying job that bored me and took a 70% pay cut to do what I love…coach football.

All of the things that I loved about it (teaching, competition, planning, relationships etc) turned to stress points. The worst part was, I had no escape, because it was what I loved to do. Adding the stress of making a living off my passion turned my passion into an unbearable emotional cancer. My health began to fail as well (I am in my late 30's!) I went back to my old job after 2 seasons.

Now I put my hours in at the office, and use my passion as a release and realize the enjoyment I had before. It was a rough lesson to learn, but one I will not soon forget.

Right on. If you can find a way to love what you do, great. But the search for the perfect job assumes once you find it, you are done. Like everything in life, you don't usually find it as much as you find your way and make it great.

It is funny that you mention pilates. A few years back I decided to chase the dream, I quit my job as competitive facial hair artist to become a pilates instructor for a large corporate health initiative.

The mantra should not be "Do what you love" but "Do what interests you". Doing what I loved did not pan out because of too much other bureaucratic B.S. that went along with it and it ruined my love of pilates. Now I am back in the rat race doing my facial hair art, it brings stability, creativity and is a real growth area. Just do it, is correct.

competitive facial hair artist? this is the boring job you quit to become a pilates instructor? i don't even know that that means.

Thanks Penelope, this article really hit home.

I'm afraid I'm going to have to stop reading your work. Even when I started ducking any column that clearly telegraphs that it's going to be about your marriage, counseling, and so on, I keep getting taking unaware by side references to same. Argh. This is a shame, because I value much of what you have to say otherwise.

Not that you're likely to take this advice, but perhaps another venue for your writing on this subject would help people like me enjoy your work? Clearly you 'love' to bring up these subjects; maybe it shouldn't be your 'work' here?

Read the article… agree with the points… your fans and comment geeks (no offense) write really long responses… I can't read them all, though I wish I could… I have no social life cuz of work and I'm 30… I'm tired… waiting for retirement…

As Tim, Jerry, and a couple of other commenters have pointed out, this assumes that there is only one thing you love. Aren't you what you love? Is it a crime to love more than one thing?

It can be stressful to work at one thing that you love and have that stress make it something you hate. I'm taking Creative Writing in uni because I love writing but now I can't stand it! However, it's not the writing I can't stand per se; it's being judged on my writing, writing for an assignment or academic purpose. I prefer writing as a means of expressing myself and letting my thoughts go – which is at complete odds with university writing.

So when you end up with a job you "love" but turn out to detest, see if there's something about the framework of the job you're actually detesting. Maybe you don't like to be dictated by others. Maybe you don't like having to micro-manage things. Maybe you'd rather work on the fly, on your own schedule, instead of a pre-determined one. Maybe you are anti-authority, or maybe you like a lot of authority. Maybe you only like it in small doses (I love Jelly Belly jellybeans but I can't stand more than 2 or 3 at a time).

Barbara Sher has a great series of books about Scanners – people with more than one passion trying to juggle them all. She argues (and I agree) that trying to pick one thing is futile. Rather, a Scanner should make space for their passions, no matter how small. Sometimes some passions don't need to be expressed the whole way – for example, you may love both sewing and painting, but while you're passionate about the business of fashion and get to express your sewing skills that way, you may be content with just painting a picture a month and no further.

I think an issue many of us are facing is that if you are good at something, or you're passionate at something, you HAVE to go ALL THE WAY with it. You *have* to make money, or you *have* to be a successful expert, or something. A lot of budding craftsters, for instance, tend to focus too much on making things they can sell – rather than just enjoying the process of crafting. Just enjoying the process has become underrated.

In short: You can't separate what you love from who you are. They're integral to each other. Trying to do something you don't love (and therefore isn't what you are) will only tire you. However, there are different ways to express your love for something, and you can love many different things, so it's up to you to find that balance that works for you. Whether it becomes a hobby or a job or something in between…that's your call.

I find Penelope smart, for choosing carefully selected topics that are bound to :
1) create controversy by giving advice contrary to expected beliefs
2) appeal to the majority (95%) of people who sell their souls and abandon their real dreams because they are afraid. This will help them 'rationalize' their choices and make them feel better.

As a veteran of two successful career changes, I couldn't disagree more w/this post. The key to a successful career is finding a. what you love and b. what you're good at and c. identifying the intersection between the two. Many of us are good at things but aren't passionate about them. And if you get stuck JUST doing something you're good at, you will burn out eventually out of sheer boredom. Conversely, as you note in this post, you may fancy yourself a jazz singer but have no ability in that field so it just won't work.

Finally, not to nitpick, but as the person who commented above me just noted, I think you've suggested the exact opposite in at least 2 other posts in the past year.

I'm a big fan of your blog but must disagree on this one. thanks….

stupid advice. and get married before you have sex again if you want a good sex life. you are advocating the most mundane/dated advice in history….work hard for $$$$ and play hard on the weekends. wow, groundbreaking. I feel sorry for you.

Penelope-Call me, you know the number:)

Good blog. Thanks for your insights.

Also, to reply to one of the comments above – happiness is NOT temporary and fleeting. I can absolutely state this is true. HAPPINESS IS CONSTANT AND UNCHANGING. It's our natural state. Everything else is opposition to our natural state of happiness. One must actually use (waste) energy to be depressed, angry, sad, lonely because in order to be these things you have to oppose the natural state of happiness.

Happiness is what is what we are. It's how we were created. Everything else was learned here in space and time.

I'm going to the wiring here…specifically the DNA variety. If we all are one in six billion, which is true, then we must live what we were made to do. I see it as living out what has been poured into us. I was almost 40 before I figured out what that was…the poured stuff.

I agree that we shouldn't speak in terms of what we love to do. That almost places the answer outside of ourselves when the answer has been inside us all the time.

Unfortunately, the world we live in conspires to choke out all that makes for a great life. And far too many people give in…

I agree that people often misinterpret the meaning of "Do What You Love." They think that if they are passionate enough about something, they'll be able to get someone to pay them to do it. However, last time I checked, our economy isn't made up of professional beer drinks, or bad novelists, or phone sex operators.

In the throes of my very own quarter-life crisis, I have to agree with Penelope that "doing what you love" isn't meant to be directed to just your job. No one loves just one thing, one function, one goal. Happiness is like a puzzle, it takes a lot of smaller pieces that need to learn how to fit together in order to fulfill your ultimate vision.

An interesting post, which has generated some really fascinating responses. I think the post does contradict others posted on the site, so perhaps that´s something to bear in mind. No matter though, so long as it gets people thinking and it helps them.

My own feeling is that there are a couple of things to remember. Firstly, do what you love and the money will follow places too much emphasis on the financial rewards. I`ve struggled financially like many people, so I know as well as anybody how important that is, but the evidence from positive psychology continually tells us we don´t get any happier for having more than a reasonable amount of income. Whatever that is! Doing what you love – happiness is not about the money. It´s about a balanced approach to life, based on pleasure, relationships and meaning.

Secondly, there's room for doing what you love in life, but who says it´s just the one thing? Not many people would realistically be able to earn a living doing solely what they love, and I certainly wouldn`t advise making oneself ill in the pursuit of such an occupation. However we can try to do more of what we love at work, or re-frame our attitudes to work to learn to get more out of work, if necessary. Or working to enable us to do what we love outside of work is a worthwhile pursuit. That´s the gist of our article on doing what you love.

Regards
Phil

I love all of the feed back on this post! It has given me things to think about. I too have fallen into the trap of thinking that I have to find something that I love to do for a living. Unfortunately for me (fortunately for them) I have a husband and a father that both love what they do for a living. Doing these things for employment and to support a family did not tarnish the love of the jobs for them. I find myself comparing myself to that and feeling a little jealous at times that I have not found that thing that I love. I thought I was all alone!! It is good to know that I am not alone out there in the abyss of jobs and careers!

"Don't do what you love, do what you are"?

Especially when this advice is geared to those at the beginnings of their career tracks, I see it more of a limiting way of looking at things.

It isn't only like one is something and most likely will be the same/similar forever, she also "become"s something different than what she is every passing moment. And I believe, it is doing things we feel passionate about that adds a lot into that becoming.

"Love what you become."
How about this?

From one writer to another – I totally agree with the sex part ;)

thanks so much for this advice as well as the advice to take the myers-briggs test! changed my life……

Remain Blessed~

" do what you love " can be explained according to every single point of view. It can be considered good or bad advice or nether depending on how you look at it. For example, I can tell you this now, do what you love, if you love not getting paid for what you love doing then this is the action you love to do. If you love to consider this advice as bad advice and not follow it. You are yet "doing" (writing-action of doing)" what you love" ( trying to convince others doing what you want love is a bad advice).

Hi P-
I'm an INFP.

At 46, I've been a product of this kind of thinking, not doing what I loved but doing what paid the bills. Along the way I've been lucky enough to have good health insurance, buy a house and cars and pay them off and work on a retirement. I've taken lovely vacations and eaten at wonderful restaurants. I've done what I love in my spare time. But I can tell you that when you've been doing the "smart" work thing for almost 20 years, it's gets *really* old. Yes, I'm planning on sticking with this agency until I take early retirement (55) but last month I put my foot down and left a more lucrative classification because it was just too hard to get up in the morning.

I took a significant pay cut to move to where I am now. And although I don't love it, I hate it less than what I did before and as a result am able to get to work on time most days. But I still have a tedious slog ahead of me which feels alot like a waste of life.

Be aware all young 'uns. Pragmatism will keep you financially secure which is a very non-trivial thing… but life is also shockingly short. Make time and bank some resources for calculated risks. You're going to need that for the long haul.

My problem is, I hate who I am.

So doing what I am is not satisfying.

There's not much "I love" doing in life.

But I'm at the same time, I'm a really "fortunate" person given my background. My parents came to Canada from a rural village in Pakistan. Most of my relatives still live there in desperate developing world conditions and the overwhelming majority of them that are around my age work as grunt labor in the middle east or are foot soliders in the military patrolling in either the disputed terrority of kashmir or along the border region with Afghanistan. So needless to say, I should count my blessings but the thing is, they have what I lack, a sense of belonging and they understand that their dreams are just dreams.

It makes me think of this quote from the movie Fight Club..

"… our Great Depression is our lives. We've all been raised on television to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off. " – Tyler Durden

and it speaks to me…all of my life, I had these wild dreams of being "somebody"

But now I'm in my late twenties and I'm realizing that I'm a nobody, just an average schmoe, working some lame engineering job, chronically shy and anxious…

But that's who I am, so I gotta be "happy" with it.

God, I needed this post right now in my life. I'm a college junior with life plans veering away from my parents' life plans for me and… I'm supposed to graduate next year and I want to do something totally different than what they ever expected of me and blahhhhhhh.

Very thought provoking. Do what you are! That is true – because you may not be as good at the things you love as who you are, if that makes sense. So, I love playing guitar…but I'm not as good at that as I am what I do.
I liked your article.:D

i stumbled upon this article the day after i wrote somthing in my journal that started off by saying "my wonderfully loving and caring parents have set me up to fail in the real world". i even had chapter titles like "its OK just be happy". they were great at being loving parents and not great at being motivating parents.

I agree. A huge problem with doing what you love is that it doesn't necessarily make you money. For example I love video games but I cannot make money off it. Very few video gamers make money of playing it, and even then your only two options is either tester or tournament player. I'm bad at both so I can't make money off doing it, sadly.

What a brilliant deduction! This is something I desperately needed to hear.
My parents have told me my whole life to do what I love. They mean well – they both have jobs they hate.
I actually have the book you talk about – Be What You Are. I haven't looked at it in years. I will be reading it again starting today. I will figure out what I am good at. I will get back on the right path.
Thanks so much for being so honest and helpful!

I agree with Mike (03/08/09) that some of us shouldn't "do what we are." I have been doing that off and on for years – I am depressive, inattentive, neuro-psychologically messed-up, and I have mounted up a remarkably unimpressive resumé as a dilettante, a layabout, and a mooch.

My successes in life are necessarily small. I have talents, but they are narrow, because I do not accept frustration – I just don't. Game over, switch off, bye-bye. I wrote one book, many years ago, I have played on 3 record albums, and do very occasional work in "vanity editing" (basically rewriting for style, something there's no steady market for).

I am proud of all those achievements, but I am not interested in being an achiever. Professionalism, in anything, means you keep doing it until you are goddam well told to stop. "I'm burning out" or "I can't take any more" is never acceptable. (I could go on forever on this topic, but anyone invested in the real world would call it whining, so I'll stop there.)

I am about to take incompletes in 3 out of 3 courses in what I had hoped would be an achievable and sensible MA program in English. I will, as I make up those "I"s on the grade sheet, be counseling and coaching with some hopefully smart and caring people about what I can do to approach work, time, and life more constructively and with more self-care. The trick this time will be learning to believe in myself – and in that I will be starting from my usual place, near zero.

amazing post, seriously

I know how it is at times chasing that dream!

I am in my early twenties and I have already started my own business which is making money! Unfortunately I see so many people trying to chase a dream that is not believeable,measurable & acheivable, however I would have to say that if you don't like what you do and it is making you unhappy it's not the end of the world, move on

I've been told I can't do it, I have to settle but I refuse to and I am glad I haven't and Will NEVER give up!It's hard work and sometimes I do get down, but I always get up! and I LOVE LOVE LOVE it!

No person ever got to 80 and is lying on their deathbeds thinking "I should have worked more hours at that job". Life is too short to do what you hate!

This article describes my life to a T. You took the words right out of my mouth but put them better than I could.

I couldn't be happier that I found your blog during what is my quarter-life crisis. It is truly fate..

Thank you Penelope!!

Yeah, I feel the same way. There's so much I want to do in life…move to new places, travel, find a rewarding career, but still find a significant other. I'm 23 (almost 24), and I feel overwhelmed almost all the time, feeling like there aren't enough years to achieve all of this without my life passing me by. I've event tried to move to New York and pursue a career in television but it was to no avail..

I'm always jealous of the people that are "doing what they love," and that I don't have that. I would be happy to take anything that both stimulates me and that's I'm good at just to provide a good life for myself.

And I don't want to go through life in a dead end job and stay in the same town I grew up. AHHHH this sux! But thanks for the blog.

i like your comment it is very important news of notary public.people should about their
government and its plans like notary public,that it is apart of government.from many decades
this notary public constitution is made for public for their benefit.thanks for sharing such
a nice topic with us.because today's busy like people just forgot their government.
thank you for sharing it.
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Pr Jobs–Pr Jobs

Lucky me I do what I love… Brazilian Jiujitsu & Vale Tudo at South America… and I LOVE what I do… and guess what, all works just fine!

Penelope,

Interesting post… and, yes, this is the same "interesting" one would use when describing one's feelings about a painting one does not care especially for when the artist is eagerly awaiting an "honest" opinion.

In short – some stuff I liked some I didn't.

I've got no problem shaking up the status quo "do what you love". I keep reminding my boys (at least 1 offically diagnosed with Asperger's – probably hereditary) they would soon tire of eating cookies if they got jobs tasting cookies.

One the other hand, I've worked at jobs I liked and some I hated. I prefer stuff I love now and always.

You're a writer. I'm a writer too. We both know it's a part of who we are. We also know lots of people who "hate writing". Should they write even if they are excellent writers? Of course not.

So if you put your suggestion in black and white by offering a choice of doing what you love or what you hate… the choice becomes clear – at least to me.

The counter to "doing what you are" is succintly made by those who hate who they are.

Besides, I seem to be somewhat hyperactive and lack a certain focus – in other words – many jobs bore me after a few months.

So here is my alternative… try find work where you do mostly stuff you like doing – or at least – don't mind doing.

I've outlined a process in these job tips articles

All in all, I'm glad I found your blog. While we won't agree all the time, I do find your stuff engaging and challenging.

Regards,

John

Your writing is great, I've been struggling with this very problem, For the last 5 years I've been developing businesses like crazy , now after 17 fully made business ideas, I have no idea what to do with them..I got tired of it. I made them, but don't want to work them. Some tell me to sell them , others tell me I'm crazy ! But everyone knows I develop companies that do not exist.. After reading your blog, It made me realize , maybe I need to be going all of what I've done, What I love is my family , what I do is up to me! Also you made me realize , maybe I need to hire people to run my companies. I can make 50 new jobs with what I have done. Right from the start. Thank you Penelope

I LOVE this post! P, you rock my socks.

One weak point in your arguement…

If you love who you are and love your strengths, then doing what you ARE is the same as doing what you LOVE.

This advice is pretty solid. I have heard it before: "you need to be practical and stop with all those wishy-washy dreams"! In other words; maintain the status quo and forget "passion" – it is just so unrealistic.

OK, I subscribed to that bit of "practical" advice and left a great opportunity in a fully-funded PhD program to do something that would "make me some money." Well, just five years into it I realize that the people who control what I do and how I spend most of my time (and how much money I make) went ahead and got that PhD. Now I am left wondering 'what if?' because I know that my current path will not allow me to leap-frog these individuals and hence I will ALWAYS play second-fiddle to someone with more credentials. I didn't know this when I threw away my opportunity. You learn as you go – and things change as you see what's really out there. I do believe that if you have the opportunity to REALLY do something that most people can't – give it a fair shot and don't worry about the critics: they don't believe in you and never will. Believe in yourself. You can always work a second job (e.g., deliver pizzas, work a night job, etc.) which can pay the bills while you hone the skills for greatness. At least if you fail you can say "I tried" and put aside the demons of regret which appear as a result of planned mediocrity.

I'm a strong believer in Joseph Campbell's advice to follow your bliss. He even claims that when you do that opportunities will arrise as if by magic. He says to do what you love with no consideration of practicality. His version of Hell is doing what everyone else expects you to do; he tells us we can do what we want to do.

In my life it has worked out. Growing up I was a science and electronics geek but I excelled at high school band and jazz ensemble and my director thought I could be a successful musician. As soon as I thought it a possibility my dream was to be a jazz trombonist and I busted my tail for years toward that dream. When this wasn't happening (even with all my hard work I just wasn't good enough) I found myself working my way through college in unskilled jobs. I didn't have a car so I bought a bicycle for transportation but learning more about bikes I got bit by that bug and started to hang out a lot at my bike shop. Eventually I was spending so much time there that the owner just hired me. I did that for years as well as riding every free moment and racing as often as my finances allowed. Then one of my customers sold me his Atari 800 computer when he got an Apple ][. I was figuring out BASIC and took a computer science class just for fun and did so well there that my professor recommended I take some more classes. After a few classes I found myself being recommended for a research assistant position and from there became a systems administrator. While doing all of this I discovered this thing called the Internet. This was years before the World Wide Web took off but Usenet News, anonymous ftp, gopher, archie, veronica, WAIS, and Internet BBS's started taking up way too much of my time. I was attracted to UNIX and C when the smart students were learning MVS, Cobol, Ada, RPG, etc. When the Web took off I was well positioned.

I consider myself to be a living example of being able to follow your bliss and do well. I have to admit that computers and networks are getting stale. I still don't know what I want to do when I grow up.

brilliant!!!!!!!!!!

If I followed this advice (do what you love) I would be a porn star

I feel like you know me. You just captured everything that was wrong with my last job and my quest for a new more meaningful one. Do what you love is so overused and doesn't work! You expressed what I have been struggling to communicate to those who don't understand this notion. THANK YOU. I am addicted to your writing- can't wait for a rainy day to read every single post…maybe a rainy weekend.

Okay, I just said I'm ready to jump start the job hunt, but honestly, I don't know how.

This is bull crap. You have to LOVE your job, or else you will go into burnout and quit. You should just say that this article is made for losers with no specific talent- so yes, they need to take ANY JOB. However, if you are any bit crative, then be an entrepreneur. If you are funny, use it. If you want to find a job, a job that suits you, just CREATE IT. We have one life to live and sorry lady, but 40 hours a week in MY LIFE, not just a part of my life. We must love, chersih and grow with our jobs. Maybe if you enjoyed your job more and took chances, your sex life would be better and you would be less eager to give dumb advice.

Penelope,

Just found your blog today and read a few of your posts. This one caught my eye as you say because everyone tells you this is the way to go and yes I've succumbed to this advice too. I wanted to see what you had to say about why it was bad advice as I had never read or heard anyone take this tack on this advice.

I absolutely loved your honesty in this posts and the others that I have read and plan to keep reading.

Good stuff.
Chris

Arghhhhhhh! It bothers me that I know that my expectations of finding a perfect career are insane… and that I should stop putting that kind of pressure on myself in my late 20s.

It's a terrifying thing to accept and let go of. At the same time, I've been pushing myself to 'find' my dream job for a few years now… it's only made me miserable at my current job.

I’ll read the book you suggested. Perhaps the idea will stick!

Great post!

Azi