I’m getting married on Saturday. We will talk about that in a minute. First, I want to address the recent onslaught of complainers who have entered my life.

  1. People who tell me I’ve jumped the shark. Honestly, I had never even heard this idiom until people started writing it in my comments section. But I’ve been writing about my personal life for ten years, and anyway, the people who complain that I don’t write enough career advice are always the people who most love to read my posts about sex.
  2. People who tell me I should record the webinars. Look. I know I should. But I don’t control it. Ryan Paugh does. Fortunately, we have a bitch session network on Brazen Careerist, and Ryan is in charge of it. So you should go there and tell him to record the webinar this Friday.
  3. People at my office who wonder why I’m not there. Have I ever told you guys how much I love waking up every day and having a wide span of time to be by myself? I wish I had paid more attention to recess. I always spent recess alone. Just to get a break from everyone. Nothing has changed since fourth grade except that it’s not the playground, it’s Starbucks.

Now. For the wedding. Here’s what I’m wearing:

I am obsessed with boots, and I buy a new pair of boots at Target every month. I think it’s because if I wear heavy socks with them then they squeeze my feet the way a hug machine might, and it helps me relax. Also, I never knew about how important weights are for self-regulation until I took my son to occupational therapy. Now I’m convinced that the boots are a little heavier than shoes, and that also are somehow is helping me focus. So I’ve pretty much stopped wearing shoes. And I was thinking of going back to shoes for the wedding, but we’re getting married on the farm, and the farmer always tells me to wear boots on the farm.

I don’t have the dress yet, but I’ll find one tomorrow. I think white will match well. I wasn’t going to get white, but my sons are suspicious that it’s not a real wedding if there is not white dress.

The second important thing you need to know is that this week’s webinar is Friday, April 14, at 1pm central. Sign up here. The topic is How to Figure Out Where to Live. I have written about this topic a lot. How where you live affects your happiness. How it affects your career, but I’ve never written about how it affects your boots.

These are the last pair of boots I bought when I lived in New York City. They were from Banana Republic.

People really underestimate how much cheaper it is to live in the boondocks than in a major city. It’s not just that the prices are lower for things you’d normally buy. It’s not just that there are no expensive stores. It’s that you stop valuing expensive stuff because no one else has it.

I never bought clothes at Target before I lived in Madison, but there are simply no high-end stores here, so there is no drive to have high-end clothes (until I fly in to NY or LA.) So I buy a lot less of everything, and I buy much cheaper versions of a lot of things than I would ever dream of buying if I lived in a larger city.

More on that in the webinar, of course. And, by the way, here are the boots I’ll be wearing in the webinar, because in video land, no one knows what you’re wearing below your waist:

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  1. Valter
    Valter says:

    Go girl! :-D
    Have an happy marriage and a wonderful,joyful, loveful life afterwards!

    PS: Love the wedding boots. You rock! :-)

    PS2: Keep us informed!
    We are awaiting news and pictures… ;-D

  2. lucinda
    lucinda says:

    Congratulations on your marriage, though I thought you and the farmer were already married. Guess I’ll follow more closely. Regarding the webinar- I think your post states a 1 pm CST start time, Vokle gives a 12 pm CST start time. Please clarify. Thanks!

  3. Roberta
    Roberta says:

    I’m with you on the ‘recess’ time alone! Hope you have a beautiful farm wedding with your new farmer hubby and farmkids!! All my best!! xo
    hope to see pics!

  4. Caitlin
    Caitlin says:

    Congrats on the wedding. I maintain that I’ll be barefoot at mine, but thats a whole ‘nother issue.
    I liked your comment about wearing boots that feel tight on the feet. It reminded me of the Jonathan Safran Foer novel, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. The little boy in it just lost his father in 9/11 and he describes things that upset him as giving him ‘heavy boots’. I’ve always liked that description.

    Wishing you the lightest of boots throughout your marriage to the farmer.

  5. Gondalf
    Gondalf says:

    Best wishes on your wedding Penelope! I pray you all the happiness and I trust your wedding to be very memorable. And by the way, thanks for the information about the boots.


  6. Barchbo
    Barchbo says:

    Cheers to you and The Farmer! How wonderful! Have a fabulous, joyful weekend – the boots are an inspired choice!

    Great point about hug machines – we were just dicussing them yesterday at work! Temple Grandin rocks. Have you ever seen one? They’re a bit industrial in appearance, but I have always wondered if they could be helpful for my some of my ASD students.

    PS: I am pretty sure that anyone who thinks that someone’s life can “jump the shark” lacks imagination and critical thinking skills. This is underscored by the fact that he/she used an outdated sitcom scenario to make his/her point.

  7. prklypr
    prklypr says:

    Congrats, Penelope. I haven’t commented in awhile, I’ve been reading and absorbing but no time for pithy comments. I have to say that the colorful pictures – be it boots or butterflies – really liven up your post. Enjoy your day, don’t stress. Despite what some bridezillas think, the wedding is NOT the most important part – it’s what comes after.

  8. Lisa Romeo
    Lisa Romeo says:

    Many good wishes on your wedding day!

    I almost choked when I read: “Also, I never knew about how important weights are for self-regulation until I took my son to occupational therapy. Now I'm convinced that the boots are a little heavier than shoes, and that also are somehow is helping me focus.”

    This exact thing happened to me years ago when my son was in OT. Once I understood this concept, it suddenly made perfect sense to me why I had, my whole life, gravitated toward heavy, solid shoes AND boots, as well as constructed clothing in fabrics with heft.

    Thanks for articulating it!

  9. Joselle
    Joselle says:

    Penelope, YAY! Congratulations. I want to see pictures of you in your dress! I love all those boots. I am a boots girl myself. Funny, the highlight of my afternoon will probably be going to Target later on. Even though I live in a city, Philly is not fancy so I love not feeling self-conscious about clothes like I do in NYC.

    I have missed your blog so much because I have not had internet access at home for two months and I have a stupidphone instead of a smart one. But you know what? I really only missed you when I got back online today. Not that you and the internet are not wonderful but in these two months without it, I’ve realized life is just as great without it. Maybe better because I am now procrastinating online instead of going on a long, rambling walk with the dog.

    While I was gone, I set my wedding date, kicked ass in my first prerequisite for nursing school, went from being the girl who said, “I don’t do math and science,” to liking it and kicking ASS in chemistry, made peace with not being a professional writer right now (and have been writing more because of that), and am looking forward to being a nurse-midwife in a few years because it’s very caretake-y (co-dependent bossy boots like me love that) but also all about solving problems and juggling. And babies and sex and way more money than editing. All good stuff.

    This is about an earlier post I just read but I’ll leave the comment here: I don’t think I’ll cheat when I’m a nurse because I’ll be an advanced practice one, which isn’t far from being a physician in many ways. Oh, so maybe I will cheat.


  10. Joselle
    Joselle says:

    PS: I shared all that stuff about me not to detract from you but because your blog and the way you think about career and life really impacted my decisions. Thank you.

    Congratulations again.

  11. Jessica
    Jessica says:

    I wore blue fuzzy snow boots to my wedding, and bought my wedding dress three days before the ceremony. The wedding worked out just great (as has the marriage, so far!). Congratulations and enjoy your day!

  12. Harshi
    Harshi says:

    Hi Penelope!
    The boots are adorable. I rarely wear them, and now I am so tempted to have them! They look delicious.

    Have a Perfect D-day. Congratulations and I wish you and The Farmer, Love Forever.

  13. Mark W.
    Mark W. says:

    I had to wear boots out of necessity in the winter and early Spring while I went to college here in the Northeast. I did a lot of walking around campus. Now I’m wondering if those boots somehow helped me to focus on my studies. :) I checked out the applicable links above – I’m always learning on this blog.

  14. Ellen
    Ellen says:

    Penelope – I’ve just started reading your blog recently, and in addition to teaching me stuff, it occasionally reassures me. This is one of those occasions: there really is someone out there more laid back about her wedding than I was! Best wishes and congrats to you and your farmer!

  15. Penelope Trunk
    Penelope Trunk says:

    Thank you so much for all the nice comments, you guys. It’s a very small wedding, but your comments make me feel like the wedding is much bigger — with tons of friends sharing in the fun.


  16. Jonha @ Happiness
    Jonha @ Happiness says:

    Hi Penelope,

    Congratulations in advance! I love how you wrap eveything up in a single post and you’re good at distracting me! I have been a away (not reading or commenting on your blog) for a day and visited others and was shocked at how fast you’ve made these posts. I mean, look at you, all too excited for the wedding and the webinar and still able to manage to write a post. Could there be much more superwoman than that! haha Or maybe you’ve been drafting this all of those times and waited for this moment. It doesn’t matter, I love hearing your updates. I’m not a boots or heels fan. I love loafers more. I think it’s fresh that you’re wearing a boots on your wedding, haha. Would it be a garden, er, farm wedding, that is. lol


  17. Niki
    Niki says:

    I’m beginning to think you are an INTJ instead of ENTJ. ;) I always took your word on the extrovert part, but the more you write, the more I think you may be mistaken! Spending time alone at recess in elementary school to recharge – totally a sign of introversion. Just something to consider. ;)

    Best wishes on your wedding weekend & always.

  18. Truly
    Truly says:

    Wish I would have read this sooner, as I’m too late for the webinar this afternoon. Will the webinar be archived? This is EXACTLY the type of thing I need to sit down and watch with my husband as we negotiate how/if we continue to live on our wages (he’s a writer, I work at a not-for-profit arts org) in Chicago now that we have a lovely new baby. Also: CONGRATS on the wedding. Rock those boots.

  19. jean
    jean says:

    Penelope, I am so happy for you, the Farmer and the children.
    This was a good post to read tonight, a very good post.


  20. Jeff Donovan
    Jeff Donovan says:

    Best wishes on your wedding day! Hope you will live happily ever after.

    I just dont know if this advise will work out in all situations :-)

    “Just be nice to her and everything will work out fine.”

    well, i still hope it will work for you.. god bless!

  21. Cheryl Gill
    Cheryl Gill says:

    It’s not true that there are no high end stores in Madison (I was in several today!) but it is true that Target is great! Embrace you inner midwestern!

  22. Paula
    Paula says:

    I find your stories about your personal life authentic and vaguely charming even when your point-of-view is completely different from mine, and even when your values seem to be different from mine. At least you are thinking about your life, and trying to share that process with others.

  23. Amy
    Amy says:

    The content of your blogs never bothers me. Whether it’s a webinar announcement or personal, It’s just nice to read to them. Your honesty, openness, and style of writing is refreshing.

  24. Sue
    Sue says:

    soo good to see this. i thought, it was a very cool and great day at the farm with the family. Happy for the fam and more blessings. :-)

  25. Lori
    Lori says:

    so true that people underestimate the cheapness of living in the boonies. congratulations x a billion on your marriage. i think you are finding your happiness at last!

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