Announcing another live video chat and something else.


It is not lost on me that my blog is slowly becoming a platform to announce video chats. So I think I’m going to have to do some fast confessing so that you guys don’t all unsubscribe.

I’m getting married to the farmer. Yep. April 17. Well, not really. I mean, I can’t totally get married because at the beginning of Brazen Careerist, I funded the company by not paying my taxes, so I owe a ton of taxes, and if the farmer and I got married, the IRS would put a lien on his farm.

So we are having an unofficial wedding. Very small. I would tell you how small, but I am not allowed to write details about the farmer’s family. Suffice it to say that on my side, only two people are coming.

And my kids. The kids really want to see a wedding. They would actually like to see me dressed like Cinderella. Because that’s what they know about weddings and princesses, two things that my kids are pretty sure go together. Instead, we will just go out to dinner and bring a wedding cake. The cake will be extravagant, and that’s what will let the kids know something big has happened.

The event will be in Iowa. Well, sort of. In Iowa, if you just exchange rings, with no vows, you are still legally married. In Wisconsin, there’s no common law marriage. So we are exchanging rings in Wisconsin and having dinner in Iowa. It’s like bar hopping, midwest style.

So anyway, I want to tell you that I’m not the kind of girl who stops working to plan my wedding. And it’s true, I’m not. But the kids and I are moving to the farm in the middle of May. And it’s a big move. And we’re remodeling the kitchen and bathroom. And that’s why I’m not posting on the blog.

I wish I were posting on the blog. Because my dream life is living on the farm and posting on my blog.

But right now, it’s true, I’m only announcing webinars and then praying that I don’t do anything inappropriate when I’m actually doing the webinar. I promise I will start posting again. I just need to pick out a bathtub and a sink.

Meanwhile, in webinar land, the topic is how to interview. I think it’s actually something catchy like three things to do in an interview to get the job. I told Ryan Paugh the catchy topic, and then I promptly forgot it when the electrician came. I wonder if when I don’t answer the phone because I’m with the electrician, Ryan Paugh thinks I don’t answer the phone because I’m thinking really hard about doing a great webinar.

Wait. I almost forgot a link! Here: Sign up for the webinar here. It’s Thursday, March 25 at 9pm eastern.

Here’s why you should go to the webinar. Because the people who hate me most hate me because they say I don’t really do anything, I just talk a good game.

So let’s say they’re right. Then all of them should be listening to this webinar because I’m going to tell you how to talk a good game. After all, what else is the interview? It’s convincing people they are gonna love working with you. I’m great at that.

Also, we’ll run through questions that I get asked all the time. How to negotiate salary, how to deal with getting fired from the last job, how to deal with references when your boss doesn’t know your job hunting. And I’ll answer your questions, as you ask them in the webinar.

And you guys can also tell me if you think that pink in the bedroom is emasculating. The farmer says it is. He says that he read about a football team that painted the opposing team’s locker room pink. That’s his evidence. I think that pink is good feng shui — it makes the relationship better. This would be a good time for links to the pink locker room and links to feng shui sites. But instead, here’s a link to the rosebushes I just bought for the garden.

160 replies
« Older CommentsNewer Comments »
  1. Desdemona
    Desdemona says:

    Don’t put pink in your bedroom if he doesn’t want it. At least not in any glaring way. Get away with soft (SOFT) pink cushions, a pink throw, a pink curtain-tie, some pink flowers on the dresser. Make it a subtle accent color, and only if you really feel you need it. Going with a color he isn’t comfortable with is BAD for the relationship, feng shui or not.

  2. Jackie
    Jackie says:

    Congratulations P! So happy for you and look forward to reading about your new life on the farm (when you blog again). Best wishes to your family!!

  3. neko
    neko says:

    So, after youre married (for real or otherwise), then what do we call The Farmer? “Mr. Trunk”? (Sorry, dude: couldnt resist.)

    Seriously: Will he ever by referred to by his (real) name? Or, at least by a new blog moniker given his new status in your life? (If we spent so much time carping on your paint choices, surely you’d think your Gentle Readers could help you pick out a new pen name for your man!)

    • Penelope Trunk
      Penelope Trunk says:

      It’s part of the deal with him. I can write about him, but he doesn’t want me to use his name. And, as you can imagine, there will be no wedding photos with him in them. I don’t think he’d like that, either.


  4. Darcy
    Darcy says:

    Re: feng shui color choices for the bedroom, here’s what I learned when studying feng shui: base it on the compass direction that the windows of the room face (for instance, green if they face east) and the astrological five element make up of the people who will be living in the room (say you’ve got a predominantly water person and a predominantly wood person, choose a color like blue associated with water element because then the water person would be in his/her element and the wood person would be in a nourishing element). In this example, maybe a blue-ish green would be a good choice.

    A color that makes one of the people who is going to sleep there uncomfortable, though, isn’t a great choice. The bedroom is a sanctuary and should rejuvenate people whenever they go in it. Congratulations on your wedding and good luck!

    • Penelope Trunk
      Penelope Trunk says:

      Thanks for the tips, Darcy. I actually love feng shui. I don’t know why I believe that it works, but my instinct just tells me that it’s right. I tried it once in LA — redid my whole apartment based on feng shui. And in some odd way, it all made sense.


  5. Mark W.
    Mark W. says:

    Congratulations Penelope. One day at a time and before you know it, you and the kids will be moved in with the farmer.
    A few less posts over the next couple of months will give you plenty of material to write about as the summer progresses. Somehow we’ll also manage to survive the dearth of posts. :)
    “And we’re remodeling the kitchen and bathroom.”
    Really? I thought the kitchen was off limits.
    Are you wearing him down and getting your way?

  6. Green
    Green says:

    Mazel tov! And although I like you a lot, I agree with the farmer about the pink. If you’re going to have an office, make that pink. Or make a bathroom pink.

  7. Ryan Hart
    Ryan Hart says:

    I can’t believe that all of the comments are about the pink colored bedroom, yet no complaints about your posting hiatus. Hope you get back to posting soon!

  8. jinky miclat
    jinky miclat says:

    The older computer with PC2600 DDR SDRAM memory is an HP Pavilion 552w, and the new computer I want to put it into RAM is an HP Pavilion m1170n.ddr pc3200 is more useful as for today. They seem both 184-pin DIMM compatible.

  9. Andrew McBride
    Andrew McBride says:


    Congratulations on your upcoming “wedding.” Your fans are happy for you.

    From a gentleman’s perspective, I would say don’t do pink in the bedroom… especially if it’s not mutually agreed upon. Not a good way to start your new life together. How about a more neutral color? Maybe look through some home improvement books and color schemes?

    And regarding your detractors, you hit the nail on the head… landing that job is about building a relationship. It’s ALL about talking and building a connection.

    Miss you.

    Looking forward to seeing you back soon.


    P.S. I think refering to your husband as “the farmer” and giving him that anonymity is interesting. It reminds me of the Jay Leno show. Jay often refers to his wife, but have you ever SEEN her? Or do you know her name? He never mentions it on the air. (I suppose you could probably Google it…) It adds another element of mystique to your blog. :-)

    • prklypr
      prklypr says:

      Her name is Mavis, pretty common knowledge. Lots of photos of her around from awards shows and the like. Jay just does a good job of keeping his private life PRIVATE.

      • KateNonymous
        KateNonymous says:

        And I have seen her–she’s been featured in magazines for her opposition to forcing women to wear burkhas (Mavis Leno was involved in this long, long before the mainstream media started reporting on it post-9/11). She’s even appeared on the Tonight Show at least once, though not as a guest.

  10. Carina
    Carina says:

    Wow, congratulations. I am really so very happy for you. I’ve become a big fan of your blog over the last few months and visit whenever I need a dose of wit, insight, and authenticity. You do good work and I’m glad good karma has come your way. Best wishes from SF!

  11. Nowgirl
    Nowgirl says:

    Who’s doing the cake?

    Perfect choice of signifier for the kids!

    Would love to see a cake pic… Are you designing it for their taste or yours?

    • Penelope Trunk
      Penelope Trunk says:

      That’s a good idea. A photo of the cake. I always think I’m on the cusp of putting photos on my blog. I really want to do more photos. Photo of the cake is a good goal.


  12. Annabel Candy, Get In the Hot Spot
    Annabel Candy, Get In the Hot Spot says:

    Congrats on your impending nuptials. My hubby and I got married in Vanuatu with only our 3 kids in attendance. It was fun – cake, champagne, honeymoon – I recommend it. My laywer in Costa Rica said it wasn’t a valid marriage but I don’t care about that. As far as I’m concerned we’re married and who cares about the paperwork? So am I officially married or not? Probably but maybe not…

    Yes, I like a pink bedroom too but my husband doesn’t. He’s not in charge of the decorating though and always seems to sleep easy no matter what color it is:)

    Don’t kill yourself with the reno anyway. Remember the things you hate now you won’t even notice in a few months time. And most of the time you’ll be in the bedroom with the lights turned out anyway…

    You are well on your way to achieving your dream, webinars or no:) Yipppeeeee.

  13. Vicky
    Vicky says:

    I’m married 25 years. The times I had flower sheets that I loved, and my husband hated, he didn’t spend extra time in the bedroom. When I purchased plain (to me) gold cotton sateen sheets, my husband absolutely loved them and spent extra time in the bedroom. And if there is any place you want your man to spend his extra time, it’s the bedroom!

  14. Vicki
    Vicki says:

    As new reader, very much enjoying your blog.

    we compromised on a deepish mauve bedroom, with bubble gum pink en suite bathroom. (we reckoned it was very small, and if we hated it, it wouldn’t be such a big deal to repaint!)

  15. Maureen Sharib
    Maureen Sharib says:

    I read your piece on credit card financing (Ode to…)
    and don’t remember seeing the past due tax trick. For the guy who called you a tax cheat tell him to look up the definition. It would be interesting to see an article form you about ingenious financing methods (like this one) and to have you reveal more about what pound of flesh one must give up in exchange for financing (I think you mentioned in your first start-up investors took 90% equity).

    That stuff is interesting and helps to keep it real for people thinking about starting (or purchasing) businesses. There’s a lot of delusional thinking out there about owning your own business.

  16. Alison Rodriguez
    Alison Rodriguez says:

    RED – Red makes the relationship better, not pink. (what were you thinking?) Apparently even some red clothes in your closet are good relationship feng-shui. Well it’s a start. I’m not talking Ferrari Red (what’s the opposite of emasculating? No, don’t answer that…) I mean like Rasberry Red or something. Surely you can find a red you agree on. Something in between pink and Ferrari … huge scope there….
    Good Luck!

  17. zbigenew
    zbigenew says:

    Taxes unpaid and remaining so intentionally? How does that not undermine your credibility and character as someone who advises people about how to forge ahead / transform their lives? The implication is cheat your way to a better life and once better, stay cheatin’…

    • Penelope Trunk
      Penelope Trunk says:

      Newsflash: It’s not cheating if you tell the IRS how much you owe. It’s cheating if you don’t report how much you owe. You can check a box on your tax form that says you are not sending in the whole amount and you’d like a payment plan. Anyone can do it. The IRS tells you what deal they’ll cut. I made a deal.


      • Mike
        Mike says:


        Spin it however you want, but failure to pay your taxes on time is wrong and unethical. It is a responsibility of all Americans who live under the protection of the US Federal Government to pay their share. Without that protection, people like you would be wearing burqas and bowing down every day to bad men with guns. And to top it off, you are attempting to evade IRS collection efforts with this sham non-marriage “marriage.”

      • pickaduck
        pickaduck says:

        Exactly, Mike. I am bewildered by this entire thing. What are all of these people gushing with congratualtions about? “OH, good for you, not paying your taxes and trying to fool your kids with a pretend wedding!” I’d really like some clarification.

      • Elizabeth
        Elizabeth says:

        Haha! I like that the people criticising you for not paying their taxes haven’t yet figured out how capitalism works. Rich people make the rules for rich people. The fact that the IRS has that check-box is one in a long line of systems that enable you to make your fortune in a capitalist country.

        I’m not rich, but at least I know that it is only my own inability to play the game that is holding me back – not some righteousness about doing the right thing.

  18. Lose Diets
    Lose Diets says:

    Wow…my dream was to live on a farm and blog. Now I am doing both. Just moved to a farm in Missouri and love it. I am sure you will, too. It is very rewarding to go out and get your hands dirty when you want to get physical and stay inside on the computer when you don’t.

    Congrats on the wedding and dinner, no matter state you are in (dual application, there).

  19. Carol
    Carol says:

    Congrats on the almost-wedding!
    Regarding pink: Stuff like paint color is not worth conflict. This single guy is accepting you and your kids in his bachelorpad home. You may be wonderful people, but it will still be a huge adjustment.

    Re the webinar: You guys have got to archive. Luv you guys but, it looks very lame to omit this. How is this: record your audio and put it out as a podcast on itunes. You will be able to edit-down your audio as you see fit before releasing it. It is worth it.

    Wishing you much happiness.

  20. d
    d says:

    I have a grayish pink bedroom and I have a boyfriend that doesn’t live with me, he just comes over a lot. I asked his thoughts on the pink bedroom:

    Well, it’s a given that a woman needs a comfort zone in her “nest,” and color is part of that comfort zone.

    My own thoughts are this: As long a a man has something of his own–either inside, outside, or both–then I don’t see what the fuss is all about. After all you can put a few Car and Driver or Golf Digests in the magazine rack. He can sit and read and ignore all the estrogen. It ‘s not as though his buddies will be hanging around teasing him while taking a dump, right?
    Emasculation by definition suggests that other males are around to goad the emascula-tee, and they’re at home w/ their wives–in her pink bathroom!

    Besides, if the lady of the house is happy maybe she’ll invite Mr. Testosterone into the shower to scrub her back once in awhile. I know that will make up in a hurry any bad feelings he has about the color scheme:) And even if she doesn’t she still need a place to feel good about herself, and traditionally the bedroom and bathroom are feminine zones. In short, he’ll get over it. After all, he loves her, doesn’t he? And despite all his chest-bumping and beer-swilling w/ his buddies he still loves all the little “feminine” touches she brings into the house. It’s why he’s with her and moved out of the frat house years ago.

    If the husband is gay or leaning in that direction then there’s no problem, either, unless he insists on his own vanity and powder area. And there may be some disagreement over the shade of pink. On the plus side she won’t have to put the Car and Driver magazines in the reading rack:)

  21. J
    J says:


    Pale pale green, or white, or sandstone for the bathroom. Pink will date really quickly.

  22. Lauren
    Lauren says:

    Congratulations on your impending wedding!

    I have a question, though. Have you gotten actual legal advice on the tax issue? Although I see that Wisconsin is a community property state (which I assume is why the IRS could go after the farmer’s property), even in community property states you can get a prenup or post-nup that states that certain debts or property are solely yours.

    And if you haven’t already set up a payment plan with the IRS, you should do so. They’re a lot more accommodating when they know you’re willing to work with them.

  23. Liza
    Liza says:

    I TOLD YOU!!! :D I knew that you guys weren’t over with, and that all you needed to do was not worry about rushing things.

    Congrats! I would go for a color that exists naturally-like green, yellow..but not pink. C’mon, be an adult-accent the room with pink towels! ;)

    I wish there was a recording for tonights webinar, these are the questions I’ve been asking myself for months!!

  24. Andrea V. Lewis
    Andrea V. Lewis says:

    I too have dreams of living on a farm. One filled with both farm and domestic critters running around on open land. Where life is simpler and sweeter. Congratulations Penelope!

    Oh yeah, I hate to side with the farmer, but please don’t paint your room pink. Not only is it emasculating for him, but you’ll be annoyed as time goes on.

  25. Chaely
    Chaely says:

    Congratulations on your re-engagement and impending marriage! I’ve been bad at keeping up with your blog lately but I’m glad to hear that you two ironed everything out. It seems like he really makes you happy & I’m glad you came to a compromise that works for everyone. He’s a very lucky man.

  26. pickaduck
    pickaduck says:

    I’m glad that you’re happy and everything, but what are we congratulating you for – wearing a dress and going out to dinner? If you want to get married, why don’t you wait until you can, and then, you know, have that wedding. Am I missing something?

  27. Jon
    Jon says:

    Here you go – it is the university of Iowa.

    It pisses people off, so there is a nay to it. It’s also in the Iowa sports hall of fame, however, so a yay to that.

    I guess that means that it will be emasculating and annoying for decades, but eventually, it will attain legendary status (in maybe the state of Wisconsin). So, depends what you’re going for then.

  28. Kyle
    Kyle says:

    Congratulations Penelope!

    If you need an awesome photographer for the wedding — I’m awesome and I’m a photographer.

  29. Erin
    Erin says:

    Well, pink is a calming color, used to promote relaxation and acceptance. It’s also a color of love :) So tell the farmer it’s to keep you guys calm. Congratulations on your upcoming wedding!

  30. Silicon Valley Warrior
    Silicon Valley Warrior says:


    The old “I am in my own business” gambit.

    Let’s see. I make money. Don’t send in quarterly taxes. Spend it and now the IRS comes a knocking.

    You are quite a find. The Farmer in the dell. Or is it hell?

    Makes us tax payers pale in comparison.

  31. fern
    fern says:

    Congratulations! You have such a lowkey way of making big announcements, or at least that’s how they come across on paper.

    I know things with the farmer have been kind of topsy-turvey, but I’m really very glad you guys are tying the knot. I think things will end up very well for you.

    best wishes.

    • Pickaduck
      Pickaduck says:

      OK, except they are not. They are pretending to get married – Penelope, what are we all supposed to be getting excited about? If it’s that you’re all moving in together, then that’s great – just say that. But you’re not having a wedding. I think you’re trying to convince your kids that you are.

  32. neko
    neko says:

    Re The Farmer: Fair enough; we respect his desire for privacy & his right to continue on as an International Man of Intrigue.

    But. I’m still thinking he needs an upgraded blog moniker after the wedding ….

    How about calling him “TOM” (“The Old Man”) ?

  33. Shannon Coffey
    Shannon Coffey says:

    Best wishes to you, and big congratulations to the farmer. I’m sure your new adventures will make for fantastic reading.

    And yes, photos please! You should get a solid camera that you’re comfortable with and just start shooting. That really is the missing element of your blog. What do all these people and places you talk about look like?

    And we definitely need at least one nice shot from the wedding. ;^)

  34. Elena
    Elena says:

    I think I like you even more after that webinar. Will definitely be in attendance for the next one. Best piece of advice: “Do you have any reservations about hiring me for this job?”

  35. Melissa
    Melissa says:

    PT – Trust me on this – pink for the bathroom is a bad idea. The house my parents live in, where I grew up, has a pink bathroom. Only, it’s been there longer than I’ve been alive, so now it’s pink and brown. Which looks awful.
    Then a few years ago my mother tried to make the pink toilet, sink and tub less ugly by changing the wall paper. It didn’t work. So she painted the walls. It still looks awful.
    Even if it seems like a good idea at the time, several years down the road it won’t. Maybe there is a sexy maroon or eggplant that can be paired with black for a modern look that will make you both happy?

  36. Ian
    Ian says:

    Congratulations! It just so happens that April 17 is also my wedding day. Mine will be on the beach amongst a small group of family and close friends. It’s all very exciting. It sounds as though you are beginning another exciting time in your life, too. Good luck to you both and be well.

  37. Leon
    Leon says:

    Purple. The bedroom should be purple (or blood red if yr under 25).
    But only if yr prepared to then act on the mood of sexual frustration yr immersed in.
    How about a post on gender roles and which side of the bed you take in relation to the door?

  38. Jon
    Jon says:

    I hope the farm life works out for you. My wife grew up on a farm and I have a blast when we go home to visit her parents. But I don’t know if I could live like they do.

    But there is definitely a lot to be said about that kind of lifestyle.

  39. Shannon
    Shannon says:

    It’s annoying how many people have commented on pink in the bathroom. It’s BEDroom, people.

  40. Courtney
    Courtney says:

    Congrats on your almost-sorta-kinda wedding. I sincerely mean that. After my former husband strongly attempted to take me for everything I own, I think an almost-sorta-kinda wedding is a wonderful alternative to the real, legally binding type of wedding that got me into my current messy situation.

    All mushy goodness aside, we really wish you would post your webinars to a site so we can view them later. I know. You know this already. It’s just that I read your blog daily and I wish that I could attend your webinars but I am nearly always working during your webinars because I currently hold three jobs due to the aforementioned divorce situation.

    So, for those of us that love you but are going through a divorce and have three jobs, could you please post webinars for us to view later? Pretty please with rose gardens on top?

« Older CommentsNewer Comments »

Comments are closed.