It is well known in the sex research arena that the more educated a woman is the more often she will receive oral sex.

I have always wondered if this is true for salary as well. For example, if your salary goes up by $50,000, how much more likely are you to receive oral sex?

I cannot find research to support that women who earn more receive more oral sex, which is why I am conducting my own research on this week's poll.

But I have a hunch, based on a string of research that I have cobbled together:

People who are open to new experiences live in big cities (except for Chicago), and high-earning women do best in big cities.

High earning women do well dating because they are better looking than average, and because men prefer dating women who make a lot of money.

The highest earning women tend to be single, and women who are single and high earning tend to look harder to find those who are good in bed.

So, it goes to reason that women who make a lot of money receive more oral sex than women who do not make a lot of money.

Whenever I mention the fact that I have an editor for my blog, people ask why. Today is a good example: You cannot be a CEO writing about how much oral sex your own demographic receives without having someone take a look at the post to see if it's okay to run.

And, for those of you who doubt the usefulness of my editor, here is his input on the topic:

“Let’s assume that men give oral sex only because women ask for it. That’s probably 95% true. Then who asks for it? Women who consider themselves at least equally deserving of that sort of consideration -the women who are going to be better earners because they are educated enough to know that they deserve it (both the income and the oral.) So I think they are coincidental, not causal. A woman who earns more has the self-confidence (and the self-worth, boosted by external factors like earning ability, education, etc.) to ask for oral.”

I'm hoping that his comment is the first in a string of insightful comments on the causal or not causal relationship between salary and sex.

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205 replies
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  1. Neil C.
    Neil C. says:

    I find this post to be useless & boring but not as depressing as many of the recent ones have been. I read this blog to be entertained & to get info that will help me in life & work while getting differing viewpoints. Since I am not getting this I am going to unsubscribe but before I do I want to share some thoughts.

    I am the type of person that most readers of this blog despise. I am a pro-life, NRA member, creationist, Ronald Reagan loving conservative but I do like to hear opposing views (unlike the progressive haters on the left & Gen Y conservatives can listen to those that they disagree with) You people & Penelope depress me so I can’t go on listening to you. You are selfish, unhappy people. It’s pretty simple. Work hard, love your family, take personal responsibility & be positive & good things will happen. I don’t hear dick on this blog about helping other people or sacrificing for your family-it’s just about trying to make yourself happy doing whatever feels good to you at the expense of anyone else. (See the entry on Ashley Dupre prasing her initiative)

    I am going to read other blogs & continue my work as a member of the vast right wing conspiracy as we expose the hoax of man-made global warming. So long suckers.

  2. K
    K says:

    Is your editor a man or a woman? I, too, find the 95% calculation ridiculous. Over almost twenty years of having and talking with other women about sex, I have personally experienced or heard of two men who were not enthusiastic about giving oral. One of them was 20 years old; presumably, he may have grown up a bit since then. I am from a very poor background but got scholarships, worked hard, etc. and now work and have worked for several academic institutions, so my experience spans over several socioeconomic groups. Good in bed/bad in bed has little to do with income or class, as I see it.

  3. jim
    jim says:

    I’m married with two young kids I’ve had no sleep for 2 years now because they wake up all the time.

    I think I remember oral sex !!! Is that that thing you do before kids come in to you’re life.

    Oh well, maybe 2009 will be my lucky year or my wife’s luck year….zzzzzzz

  4. JoAnn
    JoAnn says:

    Your editor is telling us something about himself that makes me think I would not date him.
    I would say there is a coincidental connection between income and oral sex. I have always enjoyed great oral sex from partners who shared my sense of adventure, curiosity and sensuality. Those are the same guys who are the most interesting out in the world as well. It took much longer for my academic and professional experience to develop, but in those arenas I have also benefited from my openness to new opportunities and experiences. At 56, I’m amazed to find myself defined as an “ultra-achieving woman.” Wow. And I’m still enjoying great oral sex too.

  5. Sydney
    Sydney says:

    I think the combination of you and your editor could be potentially lethal. To the people that can’t see the correlation between work and personal life here, let me make it simple for you – ask and you shall receive. In the bedroom and the office – those who ask, get what they ask for.

    I wouldn’t have been promoted if I didn’t express my interest in the position. I wouldn’t have you as a mentor if I didn’t ask you to be at the PRSSA Conference. In past relationships, I wouldn’t have gotten oral if I didn’t ask for it. Luckily for me, that isn’t a problem with this relationship.

    People that ask for what they want are star performers. Star performers are more fun to be around, better to work with, get better jobs and I would imagine they are better in bed as well.

    Keep it up, you’re incredible.

  6. Monique
    Monique says:

    It may be my (somewhat prudish) upbringing working against me here, but I felt a bit manipulated by this post. Sex sells — or at least drives up site traffic. I didn’t really find the post offensive, but it seemed like the oral sex angle was strictly a pretty transparent attention grabber. For some reason, if it had just talked about successful women and sex in general, I would not have been at all irked. I guess I just found the content a little thin, and felt oral sex was used to distract from that fact. Just me ….

  7. Chris
    Chris says:

    Interesting poll question.

    But I find that usuallt none of the possible answers fall in line with my experiances. You should always add the option of “I don’t care about this poll, I just love voting” which will allow people to participate, but give you a chance at a more meaning ful result. And probably another another option of, “I thought hard about the question, but I have a hard time relating to the narrow choices of answers you have limited me to.”

    just a thought

  8. Matt
    Matt says:

    I heard Penelope on a talk show in Madison recently complaining about how she was offended by the interviewer’s calendar of vintage pin-ups. It’s nice to see that she practices the same level of classiness as she demands.

  9. deepali
    deepali says:

    Interesting. Never had to ask, never had a problem receiving. I tend to find that the men I date are interested in my pleasure, to heighten their own. I suspect *that* is your correlate with income/education.

  10. Dani
    Dani says:

    I’m surprised that, with all the comments so far, I’m the first one saying this, but: This should really say “High-income straight women get more oral sex. Maybe.”

    Because it makes perfect sense if I automatically translate it to mainstreamese as I read it – assume that women are all having sex with men, and that therefore oral sex is a rare and special occasion like Sex And The City tells me it is.

    But reading it from my own perspective, as a bisexual woman engaged to another woman, I find that it doesn’t make much sense at all. Because in my experience, most people in this community consider oral sex to be a given. It might not be everyone’s cup of tea, but the default is that people generally like it and do it, that it’s right there on the table of at least equal importance with other potential sexual acts.

    I wonder what we’d do to the statistics there? Seems like examining this community would reveal SOMETHING about straight people and oral sex that would be useful to the original question here.

    I’m also surprised your editor didn’t catch the accidental heterosexualizing of the whole world here ;)

    • Penelope Trunk
      Penelope Trunk says:

      I actually thought a lot about the heterosexual issue in this post. You will notice that I worded the poll so that a gay woman or straight woman could answer. I had to do some verbal gymnastics to make that happen. It also occurred to me that gay women should get to vote twice — once as giver and once as receiver.


  11. James Galdorf
    James Galdorf says:

    I dunno if I can agree with this. Just take a look at a successful woman! She works harder and longer hours and is alot more focused on her career. As a result of this she will have very little time for sex and that translates into slam bam thank you ma’am. The unsuccesful women now probably just want to leave work early since they do not care about their job. As a result they will be “dined” on more often.

    anyways to sum it up…men dont get enough head, successful or unsuccessful

  12. Reality Check
    Reality Check says:

    Yeah, Penny really deserves all of that funding she desperately needs to run this blog and her company. How could a world with a horrible economy do without such fantastic career advice? Such meaningful thoughts and advice — wow!

    All that aside, all men enjoy pleasuring women. Big surprise. It has nothing to do with money or career success. For all you women out there: (at the most basic level) men don’t care about your money or success in the workplace. It is enough that you are naked and ready to go. It really helps if you are good looking and if you don’t stink.

    This is really low brow even for Penny. Investors, this is truly where the shark has been jumped. Truly tasteless material.

  13. Mark S.
    Mark S. says:

    A speed dating study? Phooey!

    High income men get more oral sex. Definitely.

    Great looking women get more oral sex. Definitely.

    The rest are maybe’s.

  14. Lindsey
    Lindsey says:

    P, no. I usually love to read your blog, and I am often astounded by your insights, but this was straight blog porn. Not okay.

  15. Huck Finn
    Huck Finn says:


    Given you’ve been on both ends of the spectrum (high income, low income), have you noticed a correlation in the frequency of oral in your life?

    During your high earning years, did you get more?
    In your low earning years, did you get less?

    I’m not in a position to offer an opinion (wife stays at home) other than she never has to ask for it. The assumption that 95% of men DON’T like to do it is off by a mile, methinks.

  16. GenerationXpert
    GenerationXpert says:

    Therefore, if I want to make more money, maybe I should get me some more oral sex?

    You know I think you’re great, P., but I think you’re better than writing about this stuff.

  17. Natski
    Natski says:

    Never really thought about it, BUT it made me come to a realization that I just had to share…I had been seeing my BF for a little over a year and he hardly ever performed oral sex on me; I’m talking maybe 5 times in the entire year. Then, I received an increase of about $12,000 a year and let’s just say the frequency has increase dramatically…and I DON’T have to ask for it…hmmm…maybe there is something to your hypothesis.

  18. Danny
    Danny says:

    LOL, you all are toooooooottttaaaaallly over thinking this.

    High Income = More money to spend on yourself.

    1. Expensive Clothing
    2. Physical Trainer
    3. Better Diet / food
    4. Manicure / Pedicure
    5. Expensive Hair
    6. Skin treatments

    You have all those to work with, you would have to be pretty ugly to start with to not be hot.

    Take Penelope for example. Above average looking, athletic build woman. With the money she spends on herself, you get a sophisticated beautiful looking woman that any man would be honored to submit to (call me anytime Penelope :-)))))

  19. Michele
    Michele says:


    Love reading you. You’re funny, brilliant and such an unconventional thinker you always make me see work/life in a different way – send my your address and I’ll be a $5 angel – (I’m older, getting divorced and work for the old world media so I’m counting the days til I’m as stressed about money as you, or I’d send more.) Michele

  20. Chris Yeh
    Chris Yeh says:

    Best. Post. Title. Ever.

    Of course, the real secret here is to buck the odds and figure out how to get more oral sex than your earning power actually merits.

  21. Gregor
    Gregor says:

    Good post. It’s a shame that observations such as these will so typically and predictably draw puerile remarks in the comments section. I actually think this topic has lots of important, economic implications.

    Time to RSS you.


  22. Hayli
    Hayli says:

    The first place I ever heard mention of oral sex for women was in the kitchen of a Cracker Barrel. No, it’s not as bad as it sounds. Heard from a veteran waitress to a younger waitress (not me): “Honey, if he ain’t petting the cat, I don’t wag the dog.” And I know veteran waitresses aren’t high income earners, but they are often the sole income earner for their household (so maybe financial independence plays a part?). Veteran waitresses are also often slightly off their rocker, Cracker Barrel pun not intended.

  23. fanf
    fanf says:

    Just discovering your blog with some of your entries.
    This one made me smile :)
    Thank you !

    I like to feel I’m part of some of a 5% interesting population :P
    Hope you a new year full of tongue play ! (meaning you’ll be rich so ^^)
    And let’s go subscribe to your blog now.

  24. James
    James says:

    If it is true, that a more successful woman receives more oral sex, I think it may be that that type of professional is more aggressive, outgoing, and probably has a higher risk tolerance. These traits would most likely not be limited to her career, but instead permeate her entire life, making her more open and expressive in the bedroom as well.

    My contention here is that it probably isn’t the successful career, or how much money is made, that correlates to more oral sex, but instead the “type A” personality.

    I believe that Outgoing women receive more oral sex and being outgoing correlates strongly with being successful, however not every outgoing person is successful.

  25. Raven
    Raven says:

    Good Lord. I just think that women who are comfortable with oral sex are more comfortable sexually, professionally, etc. There are actually some women who are uncomfortable with their bodies, therefore, less likely to explore certain types of sexual activities. So, in a general sense, women who are professionally successful are more likely to have more education (therefore, more of a sense of entitlement) and probably speak up for themselves in the bedroom and “demand” that a “cunning linguist” perform for them.

  26. Kate
    Kate says:

    Seems pretty simple to me – better educated women tend to date better educated men; better educated men are more likely to give oral sex because culturally it’s more expected of them. The intelligensia consider it an ordinary part of sex. The working classes often think that it’s a sign of being under your girlfriend’s thumb. I don’t think it’s anything to do with the women’s position at all – it’s all about the guy’s background.

  27. Alora
    Alora says:

    I think this merely gets back to a long-standing point you’ve made a hundred times: being a Rock Star at work gives you more options in life, because it builds your own personal power. A woman with a strong and well-paid career is more likely to have the confidence to go after what she wants, and is usually accustomed enough to success that she is less likely to take being rebuffed for long. On top of which, oral sex is more common among higher levels of education of both men and women, and higher educated (and better earning) women are more likely to be with men of the same category. So while I think you’re probably right, I think the question is a bit like shooting fish in a barrel: there is enough related and confirmed evidence to suggest that you’re hypothesis is valid — so much so that it is probably a bit of a no brainer.

  28. E
    E says:

    As a man who has in the past held various “low rent” jobs and is now not an above average earner, I can only commment on my personal experience. I have always enjoyed giving and receiving oral sex. Some women enjoy receiving, some don’t. I have found that the latter is less often the case then the former but see absolutely no correlation to the level of income of the woman. So maybe I am one of the few odd cases that your editor is talking about. How I feel about myself has nothing to do with whether I want or dont want to partake in either form of oral sex. Just my $.02 for what it’s worth.

  29. KN
    KN says:

    Interesting the way you put idea 1 together with idea 2 and 3 to come up with your conclusion about oral sex–I think politicians do this frequently to say that research says THIS on a subject, when in fact it is just putting together commonly held beliefs, then those beliefs are suddenly related as FACT, when all they are is putting ideas together.

    Now to the topic at hand. As a middle-aged man my experience with women of varying education and income levels is that some women just want and enjoy oral sex more (maybe the others don’t know what they are missing). My girlfriend/fiance and I are more comfortable in bed than any other woman I’ve been with so it ALL is better. I think this has to do with our compatibility and desire to please each other, and we come from vastly different backgrounds. I will tell you that women who are smart and are able to apply their talents at work (my girlfriend is a small business owner) are great to work with, as long as they don’t try to be men in the workplace! I’m monogamous but it is still nice to work with the opposite sex.

  30. Dale
    Dale says:

    This makes for sensational blogging, but does this post really highlight anything new? Sure the wealthy, successful, or attractive (male or female) are more likely to get what they want from life. It only stands to reason. Aren’t we just beating a dead horse here for S and Gs?

  31. Alicia
    Alicia says:

    The only way a richer woman is going to be more confident asking for oral sex is if she somehow feels that because she has money she has the right to ask for it. Women don’t think that way! If a woman wants oral sex, she’s going to ask for it regardless of how much money she makes! I guess I should just wait until I’m a millionaire to ask for oral sex then, right? Because apparently we don’t feel “worthy enough” already?
    Perhaps she has enough money to PAY for oral sex….ever think of that???

  32. Jerry M
    Jerry M says:

    This is by far the stupidest post I’ve read. I love when writers like you have this need to write some stream of conciousness crap as if 1) we really care 2) there is some degree of value.

    Sounds like that editor was asleep at the switch.

    Keep the crap coming!

  33. Jennifer
    Jennifer says:

    Wanted to wish you all the best because you will lose a lot of your followers (myself included) after this nonsense.

    You are so much better than this garbage you have posted!

    At what point did you think this would be relevant?

    Oh well. Should make for a great case study on how to screw up your credibility!

  34. Dani
    Dani says:

    I am fascinated by the number of people who seem to think that they should be the arbiters of what you write. Don’t like one post? Then chuck Penelope and her blog out entirely! Or at the very least post something rude about the post! You’re in charge here after all, right? – not the author! It’s up to HER to cater to YOUR personal tastes and your ideas of what her blog should contain. That’s business!

    It reminds me of Comic Book Guy, on the Simpsons:
    CBG: Last night’s Itchy & Scratchy was, without a doubt, the worst episode ever. Rest assured I was on the internet within minutes registering my disgust throughout the world.
    Bart: Hey, I know it wasn’t great, but what right do you
    have to complain?
    CBG: As a loyal viewer, I feel they owe me.
    Bart: What? They’re giving you thousands of hours of
    entertainment for free. What could they possibly owe
    you? I mean, if anything, you owe them.
    CBG: ….Worst episode EVER.

  35. The Anti Dani
    The Anti Dani says:

    Actually, Dani I beg to differ. It’s about the customer or in this case the readers. They are the ones who decide if value is provided or if it was a waste of their time.

    Forgive me for disagreeing but that is actually business.

    You have a very familiar writing style. I wonder if, no it couldn’t be.

    I’ll let you get back to the Simpsons!

  36. Janice Wong
    Janice Wong says:

    Unless I’m the 5% who never asks, every man I’ve gone to bed with has offered/given without asking and even without me giving first. In my case, income is irrelevant, because it was the same when I was a student and now that I’m making six-figures. So definitely interesting, but not necessarily linked…

  37. Zach
    Zach says:

    This is drivel. Unfortunately for all the rich, ambitious hags out there, you can really can’t buy beauty, or talent in bed. Those of us who’ve experienced plenty of different women from different walks of life know that a prada bag and expensive make up don’t mean anything when it comes to the good stuff.

    Of course that would be nice, wouldn’t it? Work hard, make network connections, make alot of money, have more orgasms, buy whatever you want, it’s the American dream baby.

    You have to be asleep to believe it.

  38. Thor
    Thor says:

    I read this and had to laugh. It’s because they put relationships off until too late in life, when Mr. Graybeard, Liberal Lifetime Mate, has bought two tickets on the Flaccid Express. There’s an old joke, and poor country girls know how true it is: What’s the difference between an uptown girl and a country girl? The country girl has fake diamonds and real orgasms. Give me a break! If you have to stick your face in her crotch all the time you are doing something wrong.

  39. ashok
    ashok says:

    More salary means more sense of independence, authority and control. And also to some extent more stress.Going oral is sort-of- reflection of any or of all the above.
    Research can also be revealing when it is conducted to find out about the ‘nature of oral sex’ and its link to the nature of job, salay and perk structure. For a highly paid woman scientist may prefer a relatively ‘softer or less wilder oral sex’ than a high paid marketing or military professional. The idea is may be the nature of job, being less aggressive or more aggressive help professionals develop ‘related traits’ and that may ‘express’ itself in oral sex making it ‘soft’ or ‘hard’
    The idea is the more the microscopic research, the more the revealation. And that is more ‘knowledge’ more understanding ‘ and more fulfilments.
    Yes, positive research increases life’s happiness level.

  40. AN  INDIAN
    AN INDIAN says:

    Hi Penelope,
    You seem to be an intellegient woman. I think there are lot of better things and topics we can discuss ‘HERE’.

  41. Jane
    Jane says:

    I think about your post the other way around. I am the mother of 2 kids and work full time. So, at the end of the day I have given all my energy to the job, kids and house and cannot summon up the desire to be with my husband. However, if he contributed to making my life easier (such as earning more money, allowing me to be a stay at home mom, resulting in getting dinner cooked, homework done, kids to activities, etc, before 6pm), then I would have the energy and desire to be with him at night. In my opinion, men who make their wive’s lives easy deserve and get more sex.

  42. Jiz Monkey
    Jiz Monkey says:

    How about this one…. the higher income women bathe more frequently, thus presenting a more tantalizing set of goods. I LOVE going down on a freshly bathed woman – can’t get enough of it. However, quite the opposite is true for a less-than-hygienic woman. I’m still trying to get the taste out of my mouth from my college girlfriend… nasty.

  43. hunter
    hunter says:

    At a singles seminar, I heard the therapist say, “A man that goes down on a woman, and does not demand reciprocity, is, god.”

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