Make a list of five things you want to do that you’re not doing. Now cross out all but one. Everyone can make change in our lives, but not that much change. And you’re not making the change you really want because you haven’t realized that you can’t do everything on your list. Read more
If you want to make a change in your life you need to change something in your routine. Gretchen Rubin writes a lot about this in her book about habits, which I read to figure out how to stop eating when I’m anxious. Read more
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I remember the shock of finding out I was an ENTJ. It’s so embarrassing to find out that all you care about is power. Well, power and money, because money is the measure of power. Well, and also with control, the more control I have over things I can build my power base with, and keep the money flowing. Read more
As someone who compulsively throws stuff out, I was thrilled to hear that the bestselling book worldwide right now is about throwing stuff out: The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up, by Marie Kondo. Read more
You should set goals because striving to meet a goal makes you happier. This is because a goal gives us structure and purpose, but also once you set a goal, your brain feels like you have already attained that goal. (This explains the euphoria we feel when we decide to “start a diet.”) Read more
The pressure is mounting for the New Year’s resolutions posts. First is the flurry of pitches from public relations firms that want to get their clients into the press. “Resolve to clean your house more thoroughly!”
Then come the academics weighing in with their research about how resolutions take willpower and how we only have a finite amount. Or how we need to make goals for ourselves that increase happiness. Or whatever will stick in mainstream media so the professors can get six-figure book deals for their research. Read more
The people who look like they have everything they want are actually the people who are most clear on what they are willing to give up. Do you ever feel sad that you have never visited the moon? Probably not. Because you just accept that you will not be doing that in your lifetime. We inadvertently start to think of other, less far-out things this way in an effort to make ourselves feel like we are living our best life. Read more
When I was trying to get on the national volleyball tour, that was the only thing I was focused on. So eventually, I played professional beach volleyball. When I was trying to get my memoir published, I was focused on that more than anything else, and eventually, University of Colorado Press came through. And when I was running my last startup, I was always focused on funding. That’s why my company never failed. Read more
I have never filed my taxes on time. Ever. It’s very annoying when people blame every little thing on their parents, so I’m not going to tell you that year after year my mom would let my dad do their taxes, my dad would wait until the last minute, and then he’d ask my mom to sign at 11:45 pm so he could drive to the post office and get it postmarked and she would say she has to read it and he would throw a fit. Then the police would come and stop the fight. Read more
Each of us is only as effective as the questions we ask. So understanding the process of asking good questions is essential to our success.
1. Ask questions about what you care about.
A great example of the importance of questions is the Justice Assistance Grant which gives states $400 million to fight crime. The JAG board asks for data on how many arrests were made and how much property was seized – questions that inadvertently encourage states to add to unacceptable rates of incarceration in the US. Read more