Vaginal rejuvenation, feminism, dog whistle, dog whistle

Vaginal rejuvination, feminism, dog whistle, dog whistle

The first time I heard about vaginal rejuvenation surgery was at a brunch when I was in my late 30s. I love brunch because it feels Jewish. After I typed this I googled it to make sure I wasn’t crazy. And it turns out that while there is no causation, there is correlation: the more Jews there are in location in the US, the more brunches there are.

Maybe Jews do brunch on Sunday like we do Chinese food on Christmas: we need to entertain ourselves while the Christians are in church.  Maybe we like brunch because so many Jewish foods are breakfast foods, so there’s no point in straying too far from that meal.

Of course along with loads of lox and blintzes there are always loads of doctors and lawyers. So I was not surprised to meet a plastic surgeon who asked me how many children I have. I was surprised when he asked me, “Do you have vaginal leakage?”

Thoughts raced through my head: He is insane. Maybe so what. Should I fight with him? Would everyone hate me? Should I be his friend to learn something? Do I have vaginal leakage?

“Yeah, I do,” I said, “Does everyone?”

“Yes. I do surgery to fix that. I don’t think women should suffer in silence any longer.”

Thoughts: Oh. He’s marketing to me. The lox need more capers. He’s still talking. Are there blintzes. Talking. Rugelach is going fast. Must walk away.

My next close encounter with vaginal rejuvenation was today. There’s an ad on my blog for vaginal rejuvenation which I would normally just squash in spam, but lately I’ve been doing a lot of work with sex trafficking, so this ad stood out to me.

Sex traffickers frequently use feminist language as a way to lure women. Crafty use of phrases like taking power back or female oppression tend to attract women who feel like they are victims. And using dog whistle tactics makes women feel like they can be part of a group because they use the same language.

The place where this is a major problem is human trafficking on college campuses. I tell you this from deep knowledge. No link here. Just a lot of hours of pain. I’m not saying the company that spammed my site is trafficking, but I’m saying this is how insidious it is. If one person clicks, and calls up to get the surgery, it’s likely the person has low self-esteem. The ad that person left on my site is at the top of their human trafficking funnel. They sort for:

a. someone who needs feminism to help themselves feel their power
b. someone who wants external validation about their vagina
c. someone susceptible to being pushed one step further

There is way more money in trafficking than vaginal rejuvenation. Most trafficking operations work in teams. The first person gets a photo of the woman’s vagina. They pass the woman to someone who gets her a clear estimate of costs. This person has her send pictures doing a lot of different things, and moves talk about the vagina from clinical to intimate. They pass the woman to someone who tells her she’s pathetic for all the things she revealed to them and they blackmail her. This person is the one who controls her.

It’s an expensive business to run. But she’s worth tens of thousands of dollars because they can take special orders for porn and she’ll do it. She’ll even edit the pictures herself. She’s being trafficked without ever leaving her house.

Gen Z will not be surprised that traffickers have co-opted feminist language.  Gen Z sees “choice feminism” as having outlived its purpose. Women have lots of choices now, which narrows the application of “choice,” and for Gen Z choice and sex have become too fused for comfort. Many in Gen Z question placing licentious pleasure over empathy. As they see it, feminism made vanilla sex antiquated, and porn made sex violent. Together choice feminism in the age of porn makes all choices support the patriarchy. So Gen Z has put the breaks on sex.

I have written before about how as women gain more equality they want more difference between men and women. Amazing as this may sound, women who have power do not want to act out male sex fantasies. But it’s more than that. Choice feminism applies to brunch as well.

There’s a great study about women who kill. We know women don’t kill as often as men do, but when women do kill, they kill people they live with and men kill people they don’t live with. Even when it comes to domestic violence. Men kill female partners when the women have kicked them out or tried to leave. And women do not kill more often when they are married, they kill more often when they are living in a family, because they kill family members.

The conclusion is that women are only passionate enough about issues of home life that they would kill. And men are only passionate enough to kill when it comes to issues outside the home. The more equality women have the more likely they are to spend more time at home, where they have more passion. My conversation with Mr. Vagina is a microcosm of this. I am thinking about food and what works best at a Jewish brunch and what I would like to make and how the party is going, while he is looking for a way to make money.

7 replies
  1. Jane Carnell
    Jane Carnell says:

    I love how this piece welded the quasi anthropological origins of brunch as a sex-linked Jewish cultural trait with all these buzz woke-words that nudge us into the direction of generational thinking SEX-GOOD, NO, SEX BAD. Strange world we live in lately. Many of us grew up thinking the more sex we had the better our lives were. Now, of course, as you pointed out, definitely not. As for brunch, I didn’t realize I was fulfilling my ethnic destiny by my love of brunch. But there it is, or was.

    As for sex trafficking, it seems to be coming up a lot lately, especially in connection with politics as we will see closer to the next big election. By chance, I did see a very powerful sex trafficking movie via Netflix DVD last week called THE WHISTLEBLOWER, starring Rachel Weisz. Knowing virtually nothing about the topic, the movie was an education for me. Thanks for always expanding my awareness.

  2. Saira khan
    Saira khan says:

    My first reaction is P! I thought you were always looking to monetize, your blog persona certainly paints that portrait. But I do agree that as women get older/gain more power they want to be and feel more like a woman, return to the feminine bulwarks of beauty, nurture and relaxation.

    Vaginal toning is something other countries like France have baked into postpartum care to avoid leakage and such. I wouldn’t devalue a vaginal rejuvenation provider, but your 3rd point is key – women willing to take the next step – i.e. women trained in their childhoods to be abused and used like objects.

    Lovely structure

  3. B.
    B. says:

    This is the most fascinating article you’ve ever written. At least among the hundred or so I’ve read… Thank you.

    • Taken Aback
      Taken Aback says:

      I just clicked on the link for it and re read.It’s frightening. In the past it happened with Catholic priests in several countries. Did they join to be close to kids or were they sent their by their parents who did know what to do with them and thought the Church would ‘fix’ them or just not make it their problem anymore?
      And I have a habit of tuning out ,sometimes mid conversatio .My daughter calls me out on it.It can be so uncomfortable to be present. We text each often in the same room because my boyfriend or baby would interupt.But also we like it.It gives you a chance to think and then answer.I used to hide alot from my parents. I feel she doesn’t do that.She used to tell me about the drama in Secondary school ,who was fighting,who was vaping .I didn’t quiz her .I left it up to herself.I used to feel interrogated by adults and that lots if questions were traps.As in they knew the answer or were waiting to for you to say a certain thing so they could lecture
      I wonder about women killing family.Is it they are mentally ill or there’s a last straw that makes them do it?

  4. Julia
    Julia says:

    Look for Jessica Pin on Twitter or Instagram. Vaginal rejuvenation is quackery. They really really don’t know what they’re doing and even their premises about what looks young or normal are off.

  5. Tqp
    Tqp says:

    Do you know what particular issues those vulnerable people are dealing with, and if there are certain fertile grounds? You mentioned low self esteem, emotional neglect (from the other article on education blog)… And how can they ask for help or change?

  6. Taken Aback
    Taken Aback says:

    How bizarre.How did he know you wouldn’t tell him to fuck off or did he care?France does have a programme to help Moms with this.Here they tell you to do Kegels but it’s left to you.I have a daughter and son .It frightens me that she potentially could be targeted by this and my son by video games.You had another post about that.Horrifying .And we give them Smart phones ‘ for ‘safety’ but really to occupy them.Maybe your son is right flip phones are a sign of enlightenment and the rst will keep strolling away.
    They talk about enthusiastic consent in Irish schools.It’s disgusting how we can twist anything to suit us.So many damaged by repression but also by the idea we should be up for anything all the time,Anywhere with anyone.From what I see my daughters age group( she’s 18 ) friends seem to be more important than being in a relationship.Where as when I was her age it veered from you being a slut to you being frigid depenon if you kissed too many boys ir not enough It wasn’t even about sex.Has too much just turned them off ut?

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