6 Tips for being a CEO without ruining your kids' lives. I hope.
I get questions all the time about how I manage having kids and a startup at the same time. After trying to answer the question a few times, I realized that there’s the pretty-much-BS answer about how it’s all about being clear on your values. Or there's the complicated, too-long-for-interviews answer.
To really get tips for being a CEO with young kids, you’d have to hang out with me for a day. Like, last Tuesday. Which was just another day of being a parent and running a startup. Except this day starts at midnight. When I decide that I am not going to go to sleep because I have to get up at 3:30 a.m. to drive to Milwaukee to catch a plane to Atlanta at 7 a.m. And here's the first tip:
1. Get sleep. The kind that is not warm and sweet.
I decide I'll stay up late and work but what I find is that I'm mostly eating. First coffee. Then coffee doused in sugar. Then peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, which I covet each morning I make them for school lunches. But normally I restrain myself.
I see now I'm too stressed for normal restraint, so I go to bed.
My three-year-old is in my bed. If I get in, he will snuggle and whisper “I love you” in his sleep. But when I get up to go to the airport, he'll have a fit, because what kid wouldn't hate to wake to his mom leaving his house in the middle of the night?
To shield my son from childhood trauma I take him out of my bed and put him in bed with my ex husband, who is sleeping in the bedroom down the hall so that I can leave on business trips.
2. Be great at business travel. But get out of it whenever you can.
I set the Blackberry for 3:30 a.m. And when it wakes me I feel like I slept for ten seconds. But this crappy itinerary was my idea. Because I was so excited to go in and out in one day and not have to stay in a hotel.
At my gate I write a blog post, and I feel really good that I can do it at 5a.m. in an airport on no sleep. I send it to my editor and tell him I'm a star for sending it a day early — usually I send it an hour before I want to post it.
Then the flight is delayed. Then it's broken and delayed. Then it's probably not happening. Then I see that I will not get to my meeting if I wait for the next flight. But another airline has four, gloriously direct flights that get there in time. I am happy.
Until I hear that the cheapest ticket is $1200. So I call Atlanta to say that my flight was cancelled and I can't get another.
3. Go to the office when you could go home. Go home later with impunity.
I want to go home and sleep. But I go to the office because we are getting ready to pitch to VCs. We have a lot of great ideas for what we are building for the community. And we are obsessed with the news that Gen Y is not using social media at as high a rate as Gen X is.
I spew the statistics about how bloggers are higher earning and higher educated than most people, and the average Twitter user is nearly 40 years old. We see our spot in the world, and we draw on flip charts and make PowerPoint slides, and then the nanny calls.
And I remember that since I'm not in Atlanta, I can take my son to his T-ball game. So I leave. Here's something Gen Y really hates: when Gen Xers bolt out the door early to deal with their kids.
4. Prioritize. And keeping the kids from screaming comes first.
I pick up my sons and they want shorts for T-ball. I'm happy about this because I can run in the house for their shorts and check my twitter feed, which is hard to read on my Blackberry.
In the house I grab a diet Coke and the fridge light doesn't work. I am so focused on shorts that it takes me two more light switches to realize my electricity has been turned off.
Then I remember that paying the bill was on my to do list. Somewhere. Under blogging and investors and T-ball. Yes, I know this is totally irresponsible. But the bill got too big at the end of last year, when my company was not paying salaries and I was not paying most bills.
Also, last week I took half the money for the electric bill and bought my six-year-old a new violin. I told myself that was OK because the violin teacher said his fingers were missing the notes because the violin was too small, and solving that problem seemed more important than paying the electric bill on time.
So I go to T-ball. Because it's way easier to deal with no electricity when kids are consumed with swinging bats at each other.
5. Get as much help as you can afford. But there will never be enough.
I call the house manager, who has written “pay electric bill” on a post-it maybe ten days in a row, and I tell her the lights are off. She gives me a plan for getting electricity back the next day. Her plan entails paying the bill in person, and stopping at the grocery store for treats, and going to McDonald's Playland, so the kids are quiet while I'm on the phone with the electric company.
The six-year-old asks what we're doing. I say, “The Internet is turned off. I have to turn it on again.”
I know this is very serious to him. Because he is consumed with watching YouTube to find out how to win levels in Super Paper Mario on the Wii.
He explains to his younger brother, “This is serious. If we don't fix the Internet, Mommy won't be able to work. And neither will her helpers. And people will not see penelopetrunk.com.”
6. Don't be sneaky. Kids always catch it.
Once I pay the bill, the sun is almost setting, and I need a plan for being in the house in the dark. The house manager makes a plan: Go to a hotel.
But I don't want to because the kids will know something is wrong. I worry they will be messed up from living in an unstable household. They will grow up wanting to work at the same job at the same company for 60 years because my unstable startup life made them crazy.
So I get them very tired at Playland. They run and scream and I almost pass out on the table because now I am going on three hours of sleep in 24 hours.
Then I take them home to perfectly choreographed sequence of pajamas-book-bed just before the sun sets. They fall asleep and don't even notice there's no light.
Then I realize that I didn't get flashlights. So I get the Dora the Explorer flash light out of my six-year-old's room and wave it around a little to test it. He asks what I'm doing.
I ignore him.
He goes to the bathroom to pee. He says, “Hey. The lights don't work.”
“Yeah. I know. Just pee and go to bed.”
“Hey. My bedroom lights don't work.”
I ignore him. I tuck him in and kiss him and I tell him that it might be very dark if he wakes up in the middle of the night, but he can call me.
“Did you not pay the bill for the lights?”
WHAT??? How does he know this? Bills? He knows about bills?
I say, “Yeah. I forgot to pay the bill. But we paid it now. And the lights will be on tomorrow.”
“In time to play the Wii before school?”
“Well. Um. No.”
“You forget so many things. You never forget your work things and you always forget the house things. No mommy forgets more than you do.”
Then he says, “Mommy, I'm scared. I don't know how dark it's going to get. And the house will feel haunted. And what if I can't see you?”
I get the kids out of bed. I decide we'll go to a hotel.
I grab the essentials before the sun goes down in our house: Stuffed animals, my laptop, my purse, and gel from my dermatologist to squash breakouts. Because people like to read falling apart in stories and words. But people start to worry if they see the falling apart in your face.
It’s possible that whisking exhausted kids off to a hotel in the middle of the night created more trauma than it was worth — snuggling to sleep with mom at home would have done the trick. And that’s not even getting into the fact that you could have fallen asleep at the wheel getting to the hotel, given how tired you were. And that the money you saved could have gone toward your next electric bill.
You repeatedly ignored his basic questions, then dragged him out of bed to a hotel to compensate. Why not just answer and comfort him?
Teenagers wondering whether bills are paid is one thing. Six year olds, another. I think you need to be concerned about how much instability they’re seeing. Perhaps Gen Y needs to take a cue from Gen X about prioritizing the kids.
I think your children will appreciate that your decisions included their best welfare. And with any luck, at least one will inherit your writing skills so that, if they do carry some suffering into their adult lives, they can at least express that in an engaging way.
Otherwise, I’ll just echo the other comments–this was indeed one of your best.
I love your crazy life. However, I could never deal with it long-term.
If you ever relocate to the Minneapolis Area and need a personal assistant (that’s good with kids!) I would consider it.
Your life would AT LEAST be an organized mess, instead of just a mess. :)
I could cry from reading this post! Thank you! I thought I was the only one. I could list the things I haven’t done for my personal life for the sake of getting things done for work, but that would just take forever and I would definitely be in tears.
P,
This is wonderfully human and balanced; bravo. I believe in you and believe you are a good person, a good mother and a good executive.
The email about David and some earlier posts are being allocated to “perhaps not the best day for Penelope” category.
Your friend,
Peter
It’s truly amazing how much kids learn but observing. Sometimes we think they don’t know or won’t notice but they do. They know everything!! I love the fact that you post things about your life without a care in the world what others will say. I’m trying to do that in my blog so that people get to know me for who I really am.
Oh I forgot to suggest something. Actually, I’ll be doing a blog about it soon. I use my Blackberry for everything including the alarm for waking me up and I use the calendary reminders for even small things like “Call mom”. And sometimes, because I know I’ll end up dismissing that reminder, I setup a few of the same reminders so that I eventually do complete this task. So… perhaps to help you pay your bills on time or whatever else you need to do, setup a Calendar entry with a reminder and if you know you’re probably going to end up ignorning it, setup the same reminder for the next day at a different time or something and I guarantee that you will end up paying that bill or at least telling your house manager to do it.
Hope this helps.
Hi Penelope
After reading your blog and all of the amazing reactions to what you did and how you handled it, I decided to write a blog about how people have reacted to this blog. What I find most compelling is how diverse the reactions were. I believe the key to our personal growth lies in our reaction to the behavior and comments of others. Take care and you are amazing for being so transparent in your life.
Gerrianne
I think the bottom line is that family and high-level jobs don’t mix well. If you attempt both as a woman, you have to do some serious lifestyle gymnastics to make it work, as we’ve seen in your posts. I cannot imagine what it takes as a single mom of two young boys, one of which has autism. So I applaud your resolve and drive and energy. There are so few women climbing high still because it is hard to juggle family and work. It’s the nature of the beast.
Usually the man is the one who has that kind of job. He has a wife who usually stays at home to take care of house things ( with or without the help of a housekeeper, a nanny and a gardener), and he has an “assistant” to take care of other matters. How a single mom can fit into that well ordered formula I don’t know.
As far as your finances and personal life go, they are really none of our business. If you choose to share them, fine, but people love taking everything literally. It makes them feel superior to then chastise you.
One of my friends who is a teacher in a low-income school district asked her Kindergarten class to make a “list” of Christmas presents they wanted that year. None of the kids could understand what the list was supposed to be. When she said it could also be a list of bills you might pay, describing what a list was, she said they started firing off bills faster than she had ever heard. They knew every bill in their house that had to be paid and when it was due. So sad, they couldn’t think of Christmas presents but were happy to share that they had gas bills & electricity bills.
My kids think I’m the most forgetful mom ever. I think it comes with the territory, mom’s aren’t perfect.
My kids also know about bills and what happens when they are paid late. They also know how easy it is to get loans but how hard it can be to pay them off. I think it’s better that your kids know about real life, bills don’t pay themselves and money doesn’t grow on trees.
Shelly – Mom to 4 great kids! 18, 13, 11, & 9
Cheap Sewing Machines
So I think it’s ironic that you think you’re qualified to tell the public how to be a good mom and a CEO. Don’t you think you have to actually be a good mom first?
I’m sorry but detailing your SEX LIFE, complete with dialogue about how you wanted some guy to go down on you and got pissed when he didn’t bla bla bla is NOT OK. EVER.
I feel soo sorry and embarrassed for your kids.
You should know better.
And all the comments about how ‘well this is how Penelope writes, she’s just being honest’ is just bullshit. Your children should not have to deal with having their mom’s sexcapades detailed on this very public site. I understand that I have no authority and you can obviously do whatever you want, but think for a second about your kids.
Really think about your kids. Is the traffic worth it?
I highly doubt you’d get as much traffic if you left out your sex life details.
I get it!
its all a constant juggling act and I am forever grateful that there are no winners or losers in juggling. Just participants!
I totally understand the violin instead of the couch, and the “forgetting” of the electric bill. Or being flush one day and scrambling the next. And the days on end of no sleep…
Just wanted to let you know that you are not the only one disguising the “falling apart” because you are so busy putting everything back together again.
Balls will be dropped, bills wont get paid and choices will be made in a split second. But at the end of the day, or in the case of this post, at the end of life i dont think the totality of balls dropped will equate to your chidlrens ruined lives.
If i thought that for one second, i would be getting more sleep, because i wouldnt spend all those extra hours trying each and every day!
hello P
I have it on good advice – from my bro and sister in law who have four boys – that schedules and life only get more hectic as the babes grow up ….
My kids are your kids ages I think – six and four – and the only way we manage it is having one of us home most of the time.
If we lived close I would be happy to share MIC with you and we could go all BIG LOVE and share the burden and the good times – my best to your life, living it your way, le
You have a “house manager”, an ex-husband, and still you can’t manage to keep the lights on? Your start-up couldn’t meet payroll–not such a great business model.
Why would anyone take advice from you, except to do the exact opposite of whatever you suggest?
Penelope, reading your advice is hilarious! I’ll bet PB & J is banned at your kids’ school, and you just don’t know it.
This is going to sound mean. But you have a NANNY, a housecleaner, and a freaking HOUSE MANAGER, and you can’t keep the ‘lectricity on?
Why should we be listening to you for advice, again?
Wow. You need help. :-) If you get that VC funding do you want to hire me? I’m a Gen Y’er (27) who ducks out early to take care of his kids and just went freelance.
Seriously, I wouldn’t worry. I think the tips are good, especially about getting real sleep. You’re honest with your kids (and us) and you give a shit about giving them a good life without running it for them.
My father lost more jobs than I’ve ever had, then came home and took it out on me. THAT screws a kid up.
I liked your reply about the finances. It’s a give and take like everything else and sometimes it’s weird, but it’s what’s right for you.
I’m just disappointed in the other comments where people are bitching about how you’re shit because forgot to pay the bills. Life isn’t fucking perfect. It’s so far from it. I can only imagine the indelible dullness they experience under the delusion that perfection can be attained.
You sacrificed a couple days of electricity (short term) to buy your kid a violin to enrich his life (long term). How is that a bad thing?
Also, seriously, hire me. ;-)
@jennyg: Penelope is not giving you household management advice. If she was billing herself as a “Guru on managing your household” you would have a point. But she’s not.
“They will grow up wanting to work at the same job at the same company for 60 years because my unstable startup life made them crazy”
This is true. My mother had a schedule like yours, but not because of success. She always had a new job or supervisor, we moved a million times when I was a kid and I just got sick of all the crazy juggling.
Well, today as a grown up I have no kids no debt and are trying to get a govenment job. I lived your adult life but as a 5 year old boy through my teens. I think living that way just over a decade is long enough for anyone, child or adult. I just don’t have the stamina to deal with all the stress and juggling. Your kids will RUN from the life you have showed them, unless they find the benefits of such a lifestyle rewarding. But since your little kid is already saying “mommy you always forget things”, I doubt they will embrace your lifetysle choices as adults.
I am living proof of the outcome of such a parental situation.
Penelope – I recently started following you after a friend sent me the “David from Ada” post, which was one of the funniest things I have read in a while. I think you are whip smart funny – in that way that makes even the most awful day seem like a hilarious romp. And on top of that you make some good points. Today is the first time I have read the reader comments and I am reminded (once again, for about the 1000th time) of how very much some people hate smart, talented and funny women. And *especially* women who dare to work and have a life other than the OrganicJuneCleaver life. Keep it up!!! All the best to you.
I wonder that you feel you can give advice to anyone when you make the choice to buy a new violin for your child (who already has one) before paying the electric bill. And if your standard of parenting is to just keep them from screaming I feel very sorry for your kids.
Why don’t you just get a 9 to 5 job and provide some stability for your kids?
You are wrong on both points:
+Violins are like shoes. Kids outgrown them. Penelope clearly said that the old violin didn’t fit anymore. And yes.. her kid will benefit far more (intellectually, culturally and emotionally)from having that violin than ‘harmed’ by having the lights turned out for one night.
+Having a traditional 9-5 job is one of the least stable things you can do for your kids right now. Those people are the ones who are facing lay-offs, or too scared to take time off to care for sick kids. Entrepreneurs and parents with non-traditional schedules are far better suited to weather this rocky economy +and+ deal with all the unavoidable mini-dramas of family life.
I feel sorry for kids who grow up with judgmental parents.
why not, penelope. you should get a regular 9-5 like mimsey and teach your kids to slave and drone rather than follow their dreams… right-o mimsey! not.
Cindy,I think you are right about people being irked that Penelope is a successful woman. I try to imagine some of the negative comments being leveled at a man, and I just don’t see it happening. And Organic June Cleaver. What an image. Shudder ….
You crack me up. I love laughing at myself and you take it to a higher level Penelope! I really look forward to reading your updates – so great to laugh at it all than to whine and get depressed. Makes it more manageable I guess. Thanks!!!!
Nice Reading.
thanks.
Sports Nutritionist
Sports Nutrition
P
Don’t worry about the kids. I lost my car and everything I owned. I moved my familiy into government housing. Guess what, my kids (now in high school & college) frequently refer to the ‘good old days’ when they used to ride the city bus and walk everywhere. They laugh about the tinfoil on the TV rabbit ears, they joke about ketchup soup and thrift store clothes. If there is one thing I can promise you, kids love you, not your money.
I love the honesty of this post. But darling, violins can be rented (especially helpful when one’s kid needs to move from 1/2 to 3/4 to full). And old violins and other stuff can be sold for $ to pay for the lights (yay house manager, give her the task). I especially appreciate the “you forget more than any other mommy”. I suspect we all get that from the little buggers (at least I do).
Why is your son sleeping in your bed at 3 years old? Our daughter is 12 days and she’s in her own basonette and will soon be in her own crib, in her room.
No wonder they have so much anxiety, you are really doing THEM a big disservice by sleeping in the same bed, my God. Do you need super nanny?
Oh Dan, Dan, Dan. Check in with us in 3 years and let us know how it’s going when your child is mobile, and verbal, and headstrong, and you are tuckered out beyond your imagination. Or at least your wife is.
Dan, as someone else suggested, please check back in in about 2-3 years and let us know. I have 3 kids (11, 7 and 3), the 3 year old used to sleep in his crib, in his own room until about a few months ago. We keep bringing him back to his bed, but he keeps coming back in our bed every night.
It is nice to see that I am not the only one that deals with the struggles of balancing work and a family. I get so caught up in what needs to be done at my business that I sometimes forget the family things that need to be done. Thanks for sharing!
I don’t have kids. In fact, I really don’t plan on having children because there is no way I could keep it all together. What I do need to hire is a wife :). That was sexist. Not a wife. A household manager sounds lovely.
Because frankly even as a single person, responsible for no one but my self and a dog – I had to do very strange things to make sure my dog was taken care of when I was working 85 – 90 hours a week or more, and traveling 60 – 90% of the time. For example, I lived with my grandparents for a bit and groveled to doggie daycares to still take my dog even though he didn’t play nice with the other dogs :(. That probably sounds silly to all of you with children or 9 – 5 jobs where you punch your time card and go home with a star for the day. Or people that don’t have a 110 pound dog. It probably sounds silly to everyone.
I think its hilarious that people have nice, neat, organized lives. It seems magical, because I have never experienced that.
Five years ago, I lived in Little Rock, AR and worked in Washington DC. A very long commute. My best friend was staying in my apartment for a clinical rotation. I had the reminder to pay the electric bill in my email, but it was buried under about 150 other emails that seemed a lot more important. Actually, I had several electric bills in my email. I’m sure they were in my real mail too, but I hate paper and mail. And probably threw them away or put them in a pile to be forgotten. I got a call from my friend because the electricity was out. To get it turned on that night it cost extra money, and she had to run around town finding a place to pay it. It was a mess.
I understand that I could have been more organized and should have used automatic bill payment. Or I could have just asked my friend to take care of it, since she was living there for free. But frankly none of those things were anywhere near the top of my to do list. I was too busy trying to remember when I had to be at what airport and trying to do a good job at work. I can not fathom adding little people that depended on me to that. My head would explode.
I really appreciate hearing stories about other people whose lives are messy :) Its not a bad thing, its just the way some people are.
And as for your kids – my parents are like me and several times they forgot to schedule the oil in our heater to be refilled before it went out. I don’t really understand the kind of heater we had – we moved to that house when I was 15 and this is the first house we ever lived in where this was a necessity. But anyway, we lived in Indiana. It got cold for a night or two (because apparently these refills had to be scheduled in advance). But we were fine. It really wasn’t that big of a deal. I still insisted on sleeping in my room in the basement – even though it was colder. I had a million blankets.
I have not stayed at one job at somewhere like GE or anywhere for 60 years. I started in public accounting (accounting for people w/ personalities and ADD) and left after 5 years to fail my first business attempt (well, the first one after college, there were more before that). I then took 6 months off to take care of my dying grandma. And now I’m onto the next business venture :). And I am temporarily broke. But that is because caring for grandmas w/ brain cancer doesn’t pay well monetarily, but it does pay well in memories. :) OMG, that was the corniest thing I have ever written. And this is the longest blog comment ever written. That is a lot of records for one night.
I love just how kids notice things. How old did you say your kids are?
I think it’s pretty funny how your kids understand the importance of your job when your posted said this:
“He explains to his younger brother, "This is serious. If we don't fix the Internet, Mommy won't be able to work. And neither will her helpers. And people will not see penelopetrunk.com."”
I appreciate the honesty Penelope. I know you can handle things pretty well than you think you can.
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Hi,
Some people aspire to this lifestyle, but I can’t help thinking how you dont become run down and stressed after your day!
Mark
Oh how I love this post. You just wrote a story about my life. It appears as if it was writte a couple of years ago and I hope things are better. It will give me hope. ;) Anyway, I’m there and so appreciate the realistic nature of your words. Thank you!
I cant agree you more.
Tell your son that I remember work things and forget home things too. I have had the lights/water/phone turned off so many times…when the nanny calls at 5ish, i know what it is for.
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thank you for sharing. this happens to normal-working-for-someone-else moms too. :)
This topic was very useful. Thanks a lot.