My miscarriage — on CNN, ABC and AOL
I don’t usually post clips of myself when I go on TV. But I’m posting this one, where I talk about trying to get an abortion in Wisconsin and end up with a miscarriage at work instead. It was a difficult interview, which is why I like it. And, remarkably, I have good hair without trying, which is another reason I like watching the clip.
For those of you who have no idea what I’m talking about. Here’s my twitter that caused uproar. And here’s my post about it. To give you an idea of the recent coverage, here’s the link that is, right now, on the front page of AOL, and here’s a link to an article by Lara Salahi at ABC News — I really like that one.
If you are new to my blog, and you’ve gotten this far, maybe you’ll like staying here for a while. Here’s a good page to begin on: About this blog.
I know I said that that this week is Asperger’s at work week on my blog. Maybe me talking about my miscarriage to newscasters is part of this series. I’m not sure. But I’ve been learning a lot about women from the comments about the miscarriage twitter — on my blog and on other sites. So I’m sure that other people are learning a lot about the lives of women — at work and at home. And that has to be good.
This will be my last post on this debate.
“a variety of social programs designed to remedy ills which can be attributed, directly or indirectly, to the misuse of human sexuality.”
Exactly. Abortion should not be treated like an instant remedy for irresponsible behavior that results in an unwanted pregnancy. It should be treated like an absolute last resort in the case of an emergency or crisis.
There should be more social programs that teach people to abstain from sex until they are in a committed relationship. Teaching them to use contraception is not really good enough since it’s not 100% effective. If you’re in a committed and monogamous relationship then it’s much easier to deal with an accidental pregnancy (and the chances of seeking an abortion are probably much lower).
“one of the main deterrents to succumbing to the temptation has been the fear of an unwanted pregnancy.”
I agree that this is a major deterrent. STDs are an even bigger deterrent (And this effects both men and women). Some of these diseases cannot be cured and can lead to death. So why don’t people make wiser choices about their sexual desires when they know that they could either get an STD or have to have an abortion?
Abortion is not a cure. It comes with many consequences. Even today, there is still the risk of damaging a woman’s reproductive system permanently. Having had an abortion can also make a women less desirable in the eyes of a potential future husband (although this may seem unfair).
I would hope that people would think twice about having careless sexual relations if they knew that it could lead to an STD, an abortion, or an unwanted pregnancy.
The problem is that a lot of people are not educated enough about these life-changing consequences in the first place.
I think the problem that many people are having with you, Penelope, is that they have never met someone with Asperger’s. One of my parents has it, although I don’t. I have struggled my whole life trying to understand this one parent and failing most of the time. But I feel I can understand your actions maybe better than some of these “upset” people. What you have basically said is what every logical, proud to be a woman, feminist woman feels about miscarriage and abortion. The problem is that most women, perhaps without Asperger’, are keenly aware of the shadowy fear patriarchal society has towards women and censor/limit themselves to only speak their most honest and deep emotions and ideas to the people they know will understand them. You seem to have an amazing ability to speak without a hint of a blush or tremble of nervousness about your honest thoughts. And this is in no way a bad thing! It is a great thing. It’s just that most people EXPECT a woman to speak, when she is speaking about something even slightly taboo, with some amount of blushing, trembling or nervous emotion. This is because this is how society EXPECTS women to behave. And the thing is is that, allied with your Asperger’s, you are able to not behave as society is EXPECTING you to behave, (but not because your trying to be rebellious), and then very, very honestly not understand when they tell you that you have misbehaved. But the thing is, I believe you behaved greatly because you were being honest. Your behavior was completely honest and your not understanding of the criticism is completely honest. And people who have never met someone with Asperger’s and do not understand it are just going to continue to not understand you in the same way I have struggled my whole life to understand my father and the way he behaves. But I am very glad for what you said regarding miscarriage and abortion and I believe it has shed a great light on very important ideas that need to be brought out into the open and discussed. I thank you for that.
I’m a guy that has Aspergers and It has struck me that a number of the women that broke into so called male professions had aspie traits at least, engineers scientist ect. I lot of them were doing what suited them, what they were good at. Unprogrammed to hide there abilities and talents.
I was confused at first when reading through some of your more recent posts about whether you actually had a miscarriage–or whether it was a figure of speech. I now realize that I was confused because I didn’t realize that a miscarriage is a gradual process–not a tragic gush of blood in the middle of the night like on the movies. As a 26-year-old woman who has never been pregnant, I would likely have NEVER known this–probably until I was pregnant myself. Of all the miscarriages people who I have known had, none of them every described what happens. So in a way, your tweet about miscarrying educated me quite a bit. And I have two Masters degrees from Harvard–so that’s quite a lot of education. You looked and sounded great on video too! Time for a PT Talk Show?
I discovered you through your article on the Guardian and I can only say one thing: “You Go Girl!!” While I was not at first that convinced of the necessity of tweeting about a miscarriage, I found the CNN interview totally appalling and you won my full support… The douchebag CNN anchor proved that abortion and female rights in general need to be talked about and defended at every opportunity.. Thank you Penelope, you rock!
I commend your bravery, Penelope. You are being honest and standing behind your convictions. You handled Rick Sanchez’s questions with grace (and big smile!). I love that you refused to speak about guilt in regard to abortion,he is an idiot. People say there are no dumb questions…I beg to differ.
I would like to see him have a miscarriage or abortion and then bring God into the conversation. If men were the ones who carried babies and had their period monthly we wouldn’t even be addressing your tweet because guaranteed it would be no big deal. If people are taking the time to huff and puff about your tweet and speak publicly about being offended by it then they don’t have enough to do and should maybe focus some of that energy into making a more positive contribution to society.
As a young woman looking for balance and direction in the world you made me very proud to be a supporter! Rock on Penelope!
I don’t know who you are other than your web site, but I like you. You’re brazen and real and compassionate and funny. Keep living your life with you at forefront. I look forward to our paths crossing some day. Kind regards to you.
I TOO HAD LOVE TO GIVE
I’d have been there for you
when you were grey and old.
Now all that you will have
is pain and remorse untold.
Was it not in Earthly pleasure
that you and daddy made me?
Why then for wordly treasure
the farewell that you bade me?
When you killed me, no tears,
just a sigh of relief.
But one day, dearest mother,
you will know the deepest grief.
Why was I not adopted?
Could not someone else enjoy
watching me grow up to be
a delightful girl or boy?
Why did you slay me, mother?
Why not let me live?
You would have loved me, mother,
I too had Love to Give.
-Rick Christensen
Oh my goodness, this “reporter” — what’s his name, Rick Sanchez? — he is the biggest jerk! I plan to boycott his program.
Good for you, Penelope! I have so much respect for you.
All the best to you.
That was a beautiful display of unflappability. :-)
If you do not believe that Life Begins at Conception, you are left with the moral obligation to pinpoint the exact moment Life does begin.
If you do not believe that Life Begins at Conception, you are left with the simple intellectual obligation to realize that “Life” is a process, not something with a tidy and obvious beginning and end. It’s inconvenient for those who want to have hard & fast rules to build legislation on, but reality is messy.
We know this instinctively; no one behaves the same towards an infant, a human cheek cell, an infant, a fertilized egg, a fully-functional adult, an irrevocably brain-dead adult, etc. etc.. They are all different; we accord them different rights and different levels of respect/reverence, and expect different things from them.
Does anyone *really* believe that life starts at conception? I doubt that there are many women collecting every period they have while sexually active, filtering it for any non-implanted or otherwise failed (but fertilized) egg so they can have a funeral and be scarred for life at how they lost these “children”.
Miscarriage/Period = no choice
Abortion = Personal Choice
Murder = Personal Choice
What moment in pregnancy do you think a woman should be allowed by law to abort? Up until the moment of birth? Since life is a process and we all grow in different ways and at different speeds, you are still left with the moral obligation to pinpoint a moment during pregnancy. You avoided that.
Why does defending a women’s right to abortion so concern you? Pro-choice women tell you it’s none of your concern. You wouldn’t have pressured/payed for any abortion(s)in your life process have you? You wouldn’t happen to profit in any way from the abortion industry, would you? Otherwise, really, why do you care so much?
I really do believe Life Begins at Conception and I’m someone.
P.S.
Rob, Periods are not Miscarriages or vice-versa.
Barb, most eggs that are fertilized do not implant — even viable, normal embryos often simply don’t manage to implant in time. Where do you think they go? To even know these “lives” existed you’d have to filter every period to check for them.
I’ll respond to your other questions later as time permits — does this much make sense to you, though?
The stage your talking about is when most women abort right?
No. A pregnancy test would still be negative at this point. Most embryos just wash out in the woman’s next period — and die — before they manage to implant in the uterus wall. Some of those didn’t implant because they were defective (about half, I think?); some were normal but just had bad luck. It’s only if the embryo successfully implants (usually about a week after fertilization) that all of the hormone changes take place that stop the period from happening, pregnancy tests will start being positive, etc..
Are you following me now? (Of course you should feel free to research this in whatever source of biology info you trust).
My point is simply, do you *really* believe those human lives — viable human embryos dying while they soak into a tampon — are equal to an adult human life? If you do, there’s a silent holocaust going on every day all around the world, and it’s time to start filtering periods to try to rescue any viable embryos. If not, well, maybe you’re starting to actual engage this issue.
Rob,
My point exactly.
You seem to miss by miles the point I am trying to make i.e. by the time a women confirms she is pregnant, Life has now reached yet another stage. But maybe this allows you to live in your reality.
Interesting to note you use the words “bad luck”. Why would it be bad luck if what was being lost was not something of importance in the first place?
Having had 4 biological children and one miscarriage (that I was aware of), I do know a bit about conception, fertility, periods, etc., etc., etc. so please don’t feel the need to patronize. You have no clue about my profession but you talk as if I am too simple to understand elementary biology.
Since you use the word “viable”, I can already predict your beliefs on this subject. You believe humans are worth more or less depending on what stage or condition they are in, I don’t. You believe abortion is a biology issue and I believe it is a humanity issue.
I will never agree with you on this issue and have heard (and listened to) pro-abortion argument my whole life. We all have to live with our own thoughts and behaviors and in the end we are only left with how our lives impacted others’.
Are you following me now? (Of course, you should feel free to research my beliefs in whatever Higher Power you trust — and if you are that HP then feel free to answer to yourself).
When you fully research and understand why I care so much, then maybe you’ll start to actually engage this issue. The reality of abortion really is messy, isn’t it?
I look forward to hearing your answers to my above questions. If you just come back with patronizing comments, don’t waste my time. I can only hope to someday become the advanced adult human life form that you are.
I hope this makes sense to you.
[sidenote: it’s funny you called out my use of “viable” as revealing my views, since I notice I used it wrongly… oh well.]
Okay, so tune down the snark, and I’ll try to avoid sounding patronizing. But I heard no sarcastic tone in your “this is when most women abort, right?” so I thought you were seriously confused about the basic process… and wasted time explaining it. Huh.
Anyway:
Sure, but this isn’t actually what we were discussing.
In super-short form:
Maybe I’m misunderstanding what you mean by “life” and what rights that deserves? How do you value a newly fertilized egg? (I’m noticing that “life begins at conception” doesn’t actually express much by itself).
My personal beliefs are not entirely fixed; abortion is a strange conflict of the rights of the mother vs. developing fetus, and weighing the value of “potential” is also tricky. I’m not sure I’d personally ever want to abort a fetus I’d fathered, and I’m very much in favor of services/education/etc. to minimize needless abortions, but I’m quite sure they should not be illegal in early stages, and possibly not later stages either (though here’s where my views get fuzzy — I can imagine legal limits on late-term abortion as long as there were exceptions possible for late-discovered serious medical reasons to abort).
So those are my views; nothing too amazing. I’m not trying to convince you to adopt them. I’m just trying to figure out what you mean by this, for example:
What does “worth” mean, here? Suppose a genetic defect kills X: we ALL react quite differently if X is 8 days after conception, 8 months after conception, 8 years after birth, or 80 years after birth. How much time & money will we spend mourning each of these losses (to use the basic concept of “worth”)? How traumatized will we be? Our reactions seem to suggest we value them very differently.
“I’m not sure I’d personally ever want to abort a fetus I fathered”? Why would you consider yourself a parent to what you do not consider life? Or is it you believe the unborn are human life, just a ‘lower’ human life form than you, so you justify killing them?
Anyway, this doesn’t matter for you. As a male, your opinions don’t matter in the least on this issue and you have ABSOLUTELY no legal say in whether your unborn child (fetus, blob, number 7974, product of conception, potential miscarriage, whatever current term you want to call Life to take away his/her humanity) is allowed to continue it’s life process. The only way you would be allowed to be involved in the process is if you are an abortionist. Then you could actually abort your own child. Otherwise, like your unborn child, you don’t “personally” have a CHOICE.
“We ALL treat/respect it differently based on stage and form.” No WE don’t. And should any of us?
“Exceptions possible for late-discovered serious medical reasons”? I had a friend with severe medical/physical(chair, breathing tube, etc.) handicaps that understood and went through more pain than anyone else I’ve ever met. He took me to a pro-choice rally over 20 years ago and told anyone there who would listen regarding aborting the “severely” disabled (because we all are in one way or another you know), “Why do you think it is your place to decide that someone like myself should be aborted based on your perception of ‘Quality of Life’?” He was one of the most wonderful people I have ever met.
I can’t comprehend “fuzzy” when it comes to the inherent right we ALL have to live from Conception to Natural Death.
“Time and Money” “How traumatized will we be?” Equating humans with any of these is a very frightening concept. However, it continues to happen over and over in history. (many people did not see the Holocaust and Slavery when it was happening as the least bit traumatizing although we now know differently). We are slow-learning.
[I didn’t feel a need to point out your obvious misuse of the word “viable” The fact that you attempted to use it was enough to paint a clearer picture of your views. You never answered the question of Why do you care? Just maybe you care because you actually should. :)
Interesting YouTube Video: Requiem for the Disappeared
The above response was one of several of mine to a patronizing pro-abortion man named Rob. We were going back and forth regarding our beliefs behind legal abortion but he has now pulled his former comments and my responses to them. Rob refused to answer my question of why he cared so much about a woman’s right to choose abortion. I am left to surmise he was not able to come up with a plausible answer.
Hi, Barb –
I’m happy to answer more of your questions, but do you plan to just avoid my single original point indefinitely? I’ve been giving examples of how we all treat different forms/stages of human life differently, and each time you say “No I don’t” or “that would be frightening” without addressing the actual examples at all. And you move on to insinuating that I’m an “abortionist”, etc..
I’m not interested in some kind of logic trap or word game; we can agree that people use words differently to try to sway the debate (like “clump of cells” vs. “newly-conceived baby”); but the reality is unaffected by the vocabulary.
So it seems like a simple but real observation that we DO treat human life differently at different stages; I’d like to figure out from there the actual difference in our viewpoints. This initial basic point is pretty obvious (and doesn’t force you to compromise your views on sanctity of life); if you’re intentionally avoiding it, why?
How about just discussing the reaction you’d give to a death from genetic defect at 8 days after conception, 8 months after conception, 8 years after birth, or 80 years after birth?
Hi Rob,
We both know my original question came first and was asked several times, that being. . .
WHY DO YOU CARE? If you’re intentionally avoiding it, why?
Answer my question or otherwise, Rob, you win.
My sincere best wishes to you.
Hi, Barb —
Phillip made a post on 1/25 about life beginning with conception; I responded to that with my single point, and you’ve been responding to me since then (but still avoiding addressing my point).
“Why I care” isn’t anything unusual anyway, and I doubt includes any ideas new to you — I don’t believe that I have the right to force any woman (including my wife) to go through pregnancy and childbirth against her will, and the difficulty of getting an abortion in many parts of the US and world causes a lot of unjust suffering by denying adult women’s rights in favor of granting rights to developing fetuses; I think the women’s rights must have priority. There’s a lot more to add and clarify but this is still a tangent.
So — now you’ll address my initial point, about why we treat different stages/forms of human life differently? I have plenty more examples if you need them. [Alternative: you’ll just pick something to attack in the paragraph above and race down the tangent full speed.]
Trying again….
Barb, I don’t run this blog any more than you do, and have no control over comments disappearing and (my experience recently) being blocked by a spam filter and/or server errors.
If this works, I’ll try reposting my latest comment; the others just seem to be lost.
Hi Rob,
I never meant to insinuated that you were an abortionist –I was trying to point out that the other person involved in making the baby has no legal say about whether the baby is allowed to be born or not and the only way a man can be involved with the decision to abort or not is if he is the actual abortionist. However, the father will be forced by law to financially help support the child if the mother chooses to give birth. I do not see this as equal rights and sincerely believe abortion has further set women back rather than brought the gender gap closer. I really don’t understand how, even if someone did insinuate that you are an abortionist, this statement could possibly offend you being you see nothing wrong with abortion.
I see it as commendable that you respect your wife and don’t want to force her into something she does not want. However, my belief is that the right to choose was made before conception (excluding of course rape or the couple who truly did not know what causes pregnancy).
In reference to your question of why we treat different stages/forms of human life differently: I’m guessing by ‘we’, you mean our country, laws, majority, society, etc. because not everyone, myself included, agrees with our country’s laws on the Life issues (abortion, death penalty, stem cells, euthanasia, torture, etc.). Our laws are a result of the beliefs of those in leadership positions (which I realize are put there by the majority) but we do know from examples in history (slavery, Holocaust) that humans can be terribly wrong. Truth is never dependent upon consensus of opinion.
When you imply that one feels different about an 8-day-after-conception life, 8-month after conception life, 8 year old life, etc. you are correct. You bring emotions into whether a human life has a inherent right to live. I’m sure I would feel differenly if my 15 year old passed away than I did when I miscarried her sibling. I would feel differently about your death than I would about my father’s passing. However, I don’t believe any one of these four human lives has more “worth” than any of the others.
Father Tad Pacholczyk (doctorate in neuroscience from Yale University, four undergraduate degrees — in molecular and cellular biology, chemistry, biochemistry and philosophy –and two degrees in advanced theology from the Pontifical Gregorian University in Rome)explains my beliefs better than I could so I will quote part of an article of his:
“If morality were merely about your and my moral opinions, the results would be disastrous. If I believe racism against blacks and the institution of slavery built upon it are wrong, but you believe they’re okay, can we both go our merry ways and live according to our own morality? Clearly not, and the United States had to undergo a terrible civil war to address this very question.
If I believe serial murder and rape are wrong, but you believe they’re okay, can we both go off and live according to our own positions? Clearly not, since both positions cannot be true.
These obvious examples illustrate what each of us already knows, namely, that in the real world “relative” truth doesn’t work. Suppose you and I each drive towards an intersection with a traffic light. If it were up to you and me to make up our own minds about what color the light is, without any reference to its real color, there would certainly be a lot of accidents at our intersections.
What many fail to realize is that the moral world works similarly. Many people’s moral lives are crashing and burning because they fail to respect the non-arbitrary markers of the moral roadmap guiding our human journey. They’ve slipped into thinking that they can make up their own rules as they go along, and that it’s all relative to their own desires or circumstances.
There are certain important truths and universal moral absolutes which speak powerfully to us as humans about how we must relate to ourselves, to others, and to society.”
There are more paragraphs in this article and you can find out more about Fr. Pacholczyk on the internet. I don’t believe I can more fully explain my position on abortion because it is just not what you want to hear. If you think there is an argument out there supporting abortion that I have not already heard, please share it with me.
I agree with Phillip: If you do not believe that Life Begins at Conception, you are left with the moral obligation to pinpoint the exact moment Life does begin.
When it comes to a person’s Right to Life, ‘fuzzy’ doesn’t work for me but since it has the support of our government, it must be okay. (Sarcasm intended):)
Hey, now this feels more like a conversation (and certainly more interesting). I have a very long plane ride tomorrow (off to visit the in-laws) so a proper reply will have to wait a bit, but I’ll on the plus side I’ll have the time to think it over properly. You’re still making a lot of odd assumptions about my views (i.e., you seem to think that being pro-choice means thinking abortion is great and/or totally free from any moral consideration? Huh) but I can clear those up pretty quickly and dig into this a bit deeper.
Hi, Barb —
I wrote out a longer message replying to everything you discussed, but I’ll save that for now so I can focus on the most interesting difference between our views (and cut to the heart of this whole debate, I think! Hooray for long plane rides and time to think). If I just throw this in there at the end, it’ll get lost. I saved the other stuff, anyway (you’re arguing against some things I don’t actually believe, is the gist), so if the conversation goes there I can use it.
Anyway: your opinions aren’t something I “don’t want to hear” — they’re logically built on assumptions that I don’t share. You believe that:
* Human rights are inherent: i.e., not a concept invented by humans, but a universal truth that humans have been gradually figuring out. [I’m not sure if you’d include just the right to life here, or other rights]
* Because there’s an outside/non-human source for the right to life, our duty is simply to search for clues to the single correct answer to how we’re intended to apply the rule.
* In a discussion of abortion, the rule is something like “human beings have the right to life”, so our moral duty is just to figure out what the rule intends by “human being”.
* The crispest line that can be drawn between “not a human being” and “human being” is fertilization — so that must be the correct answer to “when do we apply the human right to life?”
I’ll stop there; let me know if this is generally accurate, so I don’t waste time responding to words that I put in your mouth.
Rob,
Your opinions are based on assumptions and quite wishy-washy to boot. You statements about what you think I believe and why are not accurate. You state my opinions are “logically built on assumptions.” I don’t believe one can “logically” build opinions on “assumptions.” I respectfully ask you to read the following article entitled A Logical Argument Against Abortion:
http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/resource.php?n=401
This author better explains my position so if you want to continue to argue my beliefs against your own, start by arguing against each point made in his article.
I still contend my arguments against abortion are just not what you want to hear (or think too hard about).
Hi Rob,
I am sure you do realize that we can’t both be right on this issue. From what you have said, the gist of your reason for support of abortion is, “I don’t believe that I have the right to force any woman (including my wife) to go through pregnancy and childbirth against her will, and the difficulty of getting an abortion in many parts of the US and world causes a lot of unjust suffering by denying adult women’s rights in favor of granting rights to developing fetuses; I think the women’s rights must have priority.”
The gist of my point is that life begins at conception and no one has a right to murder anyone else. Some family, friends, co-workers and strangers have caused me unjust suffering but I have never considered killing any of them –well, maybe I did consider one of them but just for a minute(:
Anyway, the statements you list as what I believe are not accurate reflections of my views and it would take me some time to argue the whats and whys of each. You state these inaccurate points are “logically built on assumptions” that you don’t share with me. One cannot “logically” build points on “assumptions” in the first place. I’m too am not interested in some kind of logic trap or word game. A great article that I respectfully request you read that further explains my reasoning is found at:
http://www.peterkreeft.com/topics-more/personhood_apple.htm
I hope you take the time to read and reflect on this article and further search the reasons behind the pro-life position. We are polar opposite on our views regarding abortion and that is something we both need to admit. However, I do believe that there are reasons we came across each others paths.
There is zero chance that I will ever support your beliefs on this issue and I think I have heard all of the arguments in favor of abortion over the years. These arguments will not become any more rational when you re-state them.
I hope all is well with you and your family.
http://www.peterkreeft.com/topics-more/personhood_apple.htm
Does anyone find it ironic that Penelope is a huge supporter of Planned Parenthood but still finds herself in want of abortion after abortion? What is Planned Parenthood suggesting for birth control? hmmmm……
Bravo!
I shouldn’t be surprised, but I was disappointed at the lack of actual reporting; Sanchez was condescending and smug. His privilege as a man was evident, as was his embarrassingly vast lack of knowledge about reproduction. I have to say that even as a woman I didn’t know miscarriages in the earlier stages last that long, but he mentioned “birth of a human being” which is CLEARLY not what a miscarriage is. Maybe it was a simple mistake, but it was evident he wanted to impose his religious ideals onto you and your decision. I think he was also caught off guard that you were so open about your abortion. And the “hormones are actually god!” thing was absurd. I don’t even think he realizes that there are billions of non-Christians/non-Catholics that exist in the world, but that’s another post for another day.
I think you (Ms. Trunk) have become an unexpected and eloquent spokesperson for the most basic of feminist tenants- right of all human beings to bodily autonomy and the right for women to decide what is best for their own bodies, families, and children.
Sanchez was arrogant and unprofessional from the beginning- when he “complimented” you for coming on, he wasn’t even looking at the camera- he was fiddling with his papers to highlight his insincerity. He didn’t have a leg to stand on, and you took his near-attacks and nonthinking arguments with grace and class.
Women shouldn’t be ashamed of miscarriage or abortion. We shouldn’t be ashamed of our bodies, and we certainly shouldn’t be told we must feel a certain way about our reproductive lives. Thank you for being so open. I really believe that you helped a lot of women with this interview.
Thank you for braving the clueless, privileged mind of Mr. Sanchez.
Not all miscarriages last as long as Penelope stated.
You don’t think women should be told that “we must feel a certain way about our reproductive lives.” But IMMEDIATELY before that you state “women shouldn’t be ashamed of miscarriage or abortion.” Are the feelings of shame that many women have regarding aborting their babies wrong? Your statements are the ultimate in hypocrisy. Maybe you are in denial over feelings of your own abortion(s).
Planned Parenthood has covered up the sexual abuse of young girls by men of age from the beginning. Should women feel any shame for supporting Planned Parenthood? If you realize as I do that the Catholic Church was wrong in covering up and not assisting in prosecuting the abusers of children for years, why do you not expect and demand the same of Planned Parenthood?
Shameful hypocrites.
Huh, Barb, you did reply to my comments above (well, sort of..), but I didn’t get the email notification.
Anyway, I’ll get back to your comments once I’ve had the chance to review the links you posted.
I suppose it’s of no interest to you, but I don’t think any belief I hold has a 0% chance of changing in the future. For some the chances are pretty small, but hey, who knows. If there’s a serious flaw in the foundations of my understanding of the world, I want to know. Sorry to hear that you wouldn’t; not much else to say on that point.
I already have.
You arrogant, vain bitch.
First you’re stipid enough to get pregnant in the first place, then you cheer your miscarriage in a Tweet. Then, you flatter yourself about your appearance, and hair, on CNN about your Tweet and miscarriage.
You enjoyed your 15 minutes. Now, you can go back to wallowing in your pathetic, career-obsessed ego.
You’re disgusting.
Just seeing this here in 2010… I doubt anyone pays attention to these comments, but I can’t help leaving one.
I am not a supporter of abortion. Period.
That having been said, I see nothing wrong with the original tweet and applaud PT’s directness and honesty. Personally, I think the details on medical issues of any kind need not be shared with your coworkers, boss, or anyone outside your family. To a certain extent, that’s also just about being respectful to them. No one should have to hear about your challenging medical issues if they don’t want to, no matter whether they are broadly understood or not.
However, PT is a different animal. She makes her living online and in public. She shares things with the world that many people wouldn’t share with their closest friends. It’s part of her brand, and part of what makes her who she is.
There is nothing wrong with being relieved at a miscarriage, even though there may be thousands of women who want a baby and can’t have one. The attitude of the CNN interviewer was a perfect foil for PT’s calm responses. “Have you no shame?” And he got an education, and ended up showing everyone why it’s important to discuss these things.
Well done Penelope.
What a bitch. End of story. She couldn’t get a real career, she couldn’t even finish a degree! So now she pretends to be some expert about careers? What a joke. You can’t even use a reliable method of birth control? And the reason you are upset is because you have to drive to Chicago? Yes, you are a total adult hahahahahha
“This is the reason women should tweet about their miscarriages.”
crazy woman lets stop paying attention to her, please.
I know I’m a little late here but I just have to say that I think you handled the interview well. The host (I don’t care enough about him to look up his name) was rude to you from the start (“young lady”!?) and showed a basic lack of understanding about miscarriages. Is it not his job to do a little research on the topic prior to sitting down for the interview? I like that you stated the fact about 75% of women are having miscarriages. It is important to realize that this is happening to so many women, often multiple times. The sheer fact that it is happening so often means we should talk about it. I also agree with you about your thoughts on abortion. Regardless of whether some person or state does not believe in abortion, federal does not prohibit it. I would be upset if any right of mine was taken away for all intents and purposes by state rules and red tape simply because that state did not want to uphold federal law.
shame on you !!
you are far beyond disgusting… a life is something precious an abortion is want to admit it or not killing a human being… u are sooo disrespectful in so many levels but hey as long ur hair looks good and u are relieved u lost ur baby at work so u dint have to spend time to kill it yourself – yuk u make me feel like throwing up!
it shocks me even more that u have kids, cos honestly I really dont think you deserve them not even a husband!
You know, I was going to come up with some clever reply for this, but I’m just gonna say that I think in love with you.
Cheers!
I guess that miscarriage was not the easiest and most joyous moment in your life, but the way you handle it and talk about it – very cool, very valuable! I came across your blog yesterday, and was taken aback at first, as it’s so radical and outspoken – but the more I read and learn about you, the more I LOVE you! You are an asset to this world, which is full of stereotypes and constraints.
Great post. I appreciate how you deflected his offensive behavior and were honest about what’s going on instead of pretending like what happened was shameful, or like your choices are shameful.
I LOVE this post! You are wonderful! It is time that people understood that miscarriages are part of many if not most women’s lives. Thank you so much for doing this TV interview. I feel you struck just the right tone – sensible, rational, calm, even smiling and NOT emotional, angry, defensive. I love your blog – thank you thank you thank you.
I appreciate the openness here, but I don’t understand – you say in another post that you were basically devastated when you found out that you were miscarrying and that you wanted the baby, but then in another you say you wanted an abortion because you didn’t want another baby. Can you sort that out for me? Did you change your mind at some point?
OH. I just checked the date on the post. Obviously you’re talking about 2 different miscarriages. That super-sucks, on a variety of levels. Anywho. Love the blog.
Every weekend i used to visit this web site, for the reason that i wish for enjoyment,
since this this website conations actually nice funny data too.