My financial history, and stop whining about your job

Articles like this inspire me on a daily basis to keep plugging away and I know I’ll be successful one day.

Thanks

I believe that if people did not tend to live beyond the means necessary to lead basically fulfilling lives, they would also feel free enough to not stay at a job they hate. I had been at a miserable job for almost two years, when I finally decided to quit without another job lined up. I’m not a terribly brave person, nor am I wealthy, but I was able to make the decision with the confidence that I would be able to survive because I had lived well within my means and had not started to incur expenses beyond my student loans. I realize that not everyone has this luxury, but I think more people could. I had no car, no property, no kids, and no credit card debt, so this put me at an advantage. My main expense was rent, and I had always kept this at a manageable rate.

I was tired of becoming the person who complained about their job all day, so I removed myself from the situation. Granted, the timing of this current economy was a driving factor because I felt that it was the only time in my life where I could take a long time to find a new job without raising a red flag for potential employers. I was without a job for about 4 months before I began some temp work, but I never felt as free as I did without a paycheck coming in. The temp job turned out to be with a great company that values its employees, and it landed me a much higher paying permanent position. Needless to say, I am in a much better place than I was a year ago, without feeling like I had to sacrifice at all. I think many others could do the same if they lived within the means of a salary that was less than what they actually bring in.

It’s funny because in my trade everyone is complaining about there job right now.

Despite it being the best job in the world.

I’m a weding photographer by trade, not by choice…that was pure circumstance but the industry as a whole is changing because everyone has a camera.

Everyone is complaining about how hard it is to make a living…yet they all refuse to do anything about it. Probably because they got too comfortable in the past.

For me, I love it. Being a part of a moment so special in someones life is quite amazing and to deliver images they will treasure forever is something unparalleled in the happiness it brings.

Yet, others in the same industry are refusing to lower their prices, refusing to accept change, yet that change is good.

I think one someone is in a repetetive routine either physically or emotionally it’s hard to change the behaviour and way of thinking, perhaps exaggerating the problem of accepting change more.

Great post btw.

Chris Giles

interesting writeup, i’ve got to mention this to a friend of mine

Just came over here and TOTALLY agree with your post.

There are always choices. Sometimes the alternative is really unappealing, but every decision to get up and go to work is a decision – and one that you didn’t have to make.

This article is interesting and I agree with the overall sentiment of not living beyond your means and making adult choices to get what you want. However, much of what is written here is too general and dependent on your specific circumstances to really be applicable to everyone or even most people.

There are always ways to improve one’s circumstances but most of the options you mentioned here are simply not available to the truly poor – those without savings, skills to start a job on the side, money or resources to advance or learn skills, 5$ extra dollars to print out flyers to promote their new business even if they did have skills, proper dental care, luxuries to cut out (seriously, just cut out all my 80$ bottles of wine? Girl, my luxury right now is toilet paper), a full stomach, bus passes, comfortable shoes, a job willing to give them a raise, someone to loan them start up money or take care of their children, knowledge of what options are available to them, resources to help them gain that knowledge etc. etc.

There are ways to overcome some of these obstacles but your article doesn’t touch on any of them. For those truly bereft, much of your advice here is useless.

This post is what I would call “Chicken Soup For the Upper-Middle-Class Soul.”

Your advice is frank and useful straight-talk for privileged folks who feel trapped. It’s something many Americans might find valuable if not so easy to hear. You can’t have it all, you have to choose. Awesome. And many people need to hear it – they need to grow the heck up and make the tough choices. Agreed.

But you seem *fantastically* unable to fathom what it’s like to be really poor. You apparently live so comfortably inside your class and race privilege that you can write these “tough love” sentiments and believe–I can see that you really BELIEVE–that they apply to everyone. You are clearly so committed to this position, based on your responses to the few objections that have been raised, that I’m not even sure that “getting out more” or “educating yourself” as a few people above have advised will do any good.

I won’t try to change your mind by describing the tough life situations of people I know that disprove your thesis, partly because doing so would go too far toward legitimizing it. Instead, I will suggest that maybe you inquire into the source of your profound investment in believing that all people have a great deal of “choice” about what their lives look like, and in believing that that choice involves things like being able to “change careers” and “pick up and move to another city.” Is it too painful to contemplate an America where some people don’t have these options? Are you so afraid to confront your own white privilege? Maybe you should also consider that the fact that your life “hasn’t been easy” and that you’ve had to make “sacrifices” does not in any way negate your privilege. Everyone’s own life feels real and hard to them – that’s normal and right. But we still all have to be able to recognize our structural position and advantages, and to think critically about them rather than resorting to flaccid and self-satisfied universalizing.

I am not trying to be harsh. As I said, I really value the things you have written and think they have great value and applicability to many if not most middle-class people. But your bizarre insistence that your proscriptions aren’t class-bound, that they’re essentially “universal”… it seems like you’re smarter, and should know better, so I have to conclude that you have some hang-up about confronting the fact that some people are actually poor, with everything that entails.

Finally, I just want to say that although, believe me, I would be the LAST person to defend the offensive lady above… despite this, I do feel that the smugness with which you and some of your readers mock her “bitterness” over her lack of options, your blindness to her structural, material realities… I’m not saying change is impossible for her – I don’t know anything about her life. But then, neither really do you. Call out the racism – by all means, call it out. But once that’s done, we might use this as an opportunity to try to think about, and take seriously, the ways in which people’s conditions of capital really can delimit their life options, rather than just mercilessly mock someone’s bitterness over their own personal tragedy of a life.

Thank you for sharing your experiences, which are doubtless inspiring to many.

This is so true.  I know a couple that upgraded their house recently, they both get paid a LOT of money but then complain all the time that they never see their kids, who are at home with the nanny.  They had the choice and decided to go for the bigger house, so why moan about hating their jobs and not seeing the kids?  It really frustrates me.

Great topic! I myself recently switched career paths in pursuit of true happiness. At some point we must trust in God that we will indeed survive, for He is our Provider (not money or a job)!