Stop telling me that I don’t have Aspergers

I am so sick of people telling me I don’t have Aspergers. I am also so sick of people not listening to me when I tell them their daughter has Aspergers.

Women who have Aspergers do not look like men who have Aspergers. Men who have Aspergers look like socially retarded men. Women who have Aspergers look like neurotypical men. Of course, this is just a nice way of saying that women with Aspergers are retarded women. But the truth is that neurotypical men still look like social retards compared to neurotypical women.
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Commitment is essential for doing something that matters

For my next career, I decided I want to be a professional gamer. My kids will grow up and move out and I’ll get great internet and stock my apartment with all the food gamers want. And I’ll recruit an awesome team because they can live rent-free and play together in one room.
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Melissa is getting married

I confess that she got engaged way earlier than just now. I had to get used to the idea. It’s a big change and of course I’m happy for her, but I’m nervous about the change.
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Misogynist conversations women have all the time

Maybe you have not said all of these phrases, but you have said one of these, and you need to own up to it. Because all the #metoos of the world are not going to change things without you taking personal responsibility for the ways you put down other women.
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The problem with personality types: testing yourself rarely works

A few months ago I did an experiment. I usually charge $350 for a coaching session, and at that fee I let people pick the time they want to talk. But then I said that if people booked the session at 7am or 10pm I would discount the cost to $150. Nearly overnight I was booked for three months solid. Here’s what I’ve learned:
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5 Types of underperformers who get an MBA

Business school applications are due at the beginning of January. Now is the time to withdraw your application.

Because you should not go to business school. If you want to start a company, you should start a company. And if you want to climb the corporate ladder you should do that. An MBA does not help you with either of those goals.
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How to make anyone adore you

This week Melissa is working with clients in New York during the day and sleeping at my apartment in Swarthmore. I wait for her to return each night at 9pm like I am like the cranky wife frustrated by her spouse’s long commute. My kids wait to light Chanukah candles with her like they are the cranky four-year-olds frustrated by the long wait for gifts.
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Children’s books that made me rethink careers

When Squarespace contacted me and asked me to collaborate with them, I said yes. I usually say no to everybody. But, everybody I know uses them for their sites and their sites all look so good. And I thought it would be really good for my brand to be working with Squarespace. So I said yes. Then I did a lot of thinking about the best way to do the partnership with them, because I had a million ideas and you can do anything on Squarespace.

My grandma had a children’s book store. I helped her do the book buying to open the store. I got to pick the books for the kids my age.

I remember thinking this is so fun. And also, why does she get to have a store and I don’t?
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An open letter to everyone who is concerned about the wage gap

First of all, a confession: I think the wage gap is fine. I am paid much less than men with my experience and track record, and I don’t care, because I want to be with my kids.

Still, I know many people are passionate about closing the gap. In this post, I will tell you what you can do to close the wage gap.
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Online course: What INFJs need most (I know because I’ve coached almost all of them)

This course includes four days of video sessions and email-based course materials about the issues INFJs face that no other type has to deal with. You can purchase this course for anytime, on-demand access. 

Sign up now

Melissa and I have a love/hate relationship with INFJs. We hate them because they are so judgy. And we are not judgy because we are too uncaring to be judgy. But actually we spend a lot of time being judgy about the INFJs for being so judgy.

Two days ago I was pacing my living room coaching an INFJ and it went like many coaching sessions with INFJs. I said, “To get started, what’s your personality type and how old are you?”

The person answered, “I’m an INTJ and I’m old.”


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