Comments on: 4 Types of questions get us in trouble http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/ Advice at the intersection of work and life Fri, 19 Mar 2010 10:48:49 -0600 http://wordpress.org/?v=abc hourly 1 By: The most important question for any blogger… http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/comment-page-1/#comment-223239 The most important question for any blogger… Wed, 10 Mar 2010 03:41:21 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/?p=4062#comment-223239 [...] of Brazen Careerist did a great post about asking the right questions, the post really got me thinking, actually, it was gold…for me all because of one question it [...] [...] of Brazen Careerist did a great post about asking the right questions, the post really got me thinking, actually, it was gold…for me all because of one question it [...]

]]> By: Jonasfreebies http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/comment-page-1/#comment-220988 Jonasfreebies Wed, 17 Feb 2010 02:39:51 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/?p=4062#comment-220988 I would be more interested in finding out what motivates someone to ask specific question in the first place, one can ask questions to make other people feel miserable, arouses curiosity even chaos. Sometimes people ask question not because they want to get smarter, because they already knew the answer, but they want to challenge you, they tested your limit and hit your soft spot in the gut and leaves you bewildered. Jonas I would be more interested in finding out what motivates someone to ask specific question in the first place, one can ask questions to make other people feel miserable, arouses curiosity even chaos. Sometimes people ask question not because they want to get smarter, because they already knew the answer, but they want to challenge you, they tested your limit and hit your soft spot in the gut and leaves you bewildered.

Jonas

]]> By: jesse http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/comment-page-1/#comment-215067 jesse Mon, 30 Nov 2009 20:23:14 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/?p=4062#comment-215067 Regarding the first question: there is no meaning to life. Only symbols and signs carry meaning, and life is not a symbol. Being a symbol is a difficult weight to shoulder; the human act of representing must be accompanied with increased power and resources in order to be worthwhile to most unless one is a masochist or some other something-or-other. Life is meaningless. Have fun or die. Regarding the first question: there is no meaning to life. Only symbols and signs carry meaning, and life is not a symbol. Being a symbol is a difficult weight to shoulder; the human act of representing must be accompanied with increased power and resources in order to be worthwhile to most unless one is a masochist or some other something-or-other.

Life is meaningless. Have fun or die.

]]> By: MikeK http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/comment-page-1/#comment-213877 MikeK Wed, 11 Nov 2009 00:16:53 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/?p=4062#comment-213877 Interesting post. My question to you is what makes a good question? I think there's a trap in being too analytical. Being afraid to ask questions is not a good predicament to be in. Interesting post. My question to you is what makes a good question? I think there's a trap in being too analytical. Being afraid to ask questions is not a good predicament to be in.

]]> By: Ads Don’t Trick You, You Trick You « http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/comment-page-1/#comment-212766 Ads Don’t Trick You, You Trick You « Tue, 27 Oct 2009 21:47:35 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/?p=4062#comment-212766 [...] play a trick on myself occasionally that I learned from Penelope Trunk. Instead of telling myself I am going to the gym after work, I say I will drive around the block [...] [...] play a trick on myself occasionally that I learned from Penelope Trunk. Instead of telling myself I am going to the gym after work, I say I will drive around the block [...]

]]> By: oldfeminist http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/comment-page-1/#comment-211987 oldfeminist Sun, 18 Oct 2009 03:39:54 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/?p=4062#comment-211987 I'm fairly new to this blog, and I must say I'm a little surprised how many people spend their time admonishing PT to be nicer to everyone all the time. The degree of handholding expected here seems absurd to me. Jim, I guess you have time to answer every single detailed question anyone asks you with a series of incisive, deeply-thought-through questions, and then spend time lovingly crafting a long, detailed guru-like answer that will change the questioner's mind? I don't think you have the slightest idea how much time it would take for PT to do this with every single question someone asks her -- and expects her to answer <i>for free</i>. You're <I>someone's</i> special snowflake, sure, but not hers. If you want emotional validation or in-depth individual career counseling, you're in the wrong place. I'm fairly new to this blog, and I must say I'm a little surprised how many people spend their time admonishing PT to be nicer to everyone all the time. The degree of handholding expected here seems absurd to me.

Jim, I guess you have time to answer every single detailed question anyone asks you with a series of incisive, deeply-thought-through questions, and then spend time lovingly crafting a long, detailed guru-like answer that will change the questioner's mind?

I don't think you have the slightest idea how much time it would take for PT to do this with every single question someone asks her — and expects her to answer for free.

You're someone's special snowflake, sure, but not hers. If you want emotional validation or in-depth individual career counseling, you're in the wrong place.

]]> By: maeve http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/comment-page-1/#comment-211907 maeve Fri, 16 Oct 2009 21:10:30 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/?p=4062#comment-211907 Sick, sad, slutty narcissist. Yuck. Bye, "brazen opportunist, oops- "brazen careerist." I could just puke at all of the "way to go, thank you for opening up a dialogue to empower women" comments, just loved the really intelligent interview on CNN- really? Really, people? Are you that stupid? Don't answer that, please. I've read enough comments about the hair to know. -maeve Sick, sad, slutty narcissist. Yuck. Bye, "brazen opportunist, oops- "brazen careerist." I could just puke at all of the "way to go, thank you for opening up a dialogue to empower women" comments, just loved the really intelligent interview on CNN- really? Really, people? Are you that stupid? Don't answer that, please. I've read enough comments about the hair to know.
-maeve

]]> By: S. http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/comment-page-1/#comment-211494 S. Fri, 16 Oct 2009 06:12:13 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/?p=4062#comment-211494 Penelope, What are the two best questions you've ever asked people, and what are the two best questions anybody has ever asked you? Thanks. Penelope,

What are the two best questions you've ever asked people, and what are the two best questions anybody has ever asked you?

Thanks.

]]> By: Lea http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/comment-page-1/#comment-211273 Lea Thu, 15 Oct 2009 16:42:52 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/?p=4062#comment-211273 "Advice is what you ask for when you already know the answer but wish you didn't." -- Erica Jong, novelist Interesting post, and even more interesting comments. I think the people who are complaining about how you shunted aside the writer of the "bad e-mail" are missing the point. Cultural differences aside, YOU are not here to serve as a career counselor to everyone who writes to you. You help people who help themselves, and you've given us many, many, many tools in your blog posts. You're an expert in this topic, and by this point, you should be picking and choosing which questions you answer. Good questions get answered. Makes sense. The writer of the e-mail needs to do his/her research and reading and make decisions about what he/she wants out of life, work and career. Those are things no one can help with anyway. "Advice is what you ask for when you already know the answer but wish you didn't."
– Erica Jong, novelist

Interesting post, and even more interesting comments. I think the people who are complaining about how you shunted aside the writer of the "bad e-mail" are missing the point. Cultural differences aside, YOU are not here to serve as a career counselor to everyone who writes to you. You help people who help themselves, and you've given us many, many, many tools in your blog posts. You're an expert in this topic, and by this point, you should be picking and choosing which questions you answer. Good questions get answered. Makes sense.

The writer of the e-mail needs to do his/her research and reading and make decisions about what he/she wants out of life, work and career. Those are things no one can help with anyway.

]]> By: Wang Moli http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2009/10/12/how-to-ask-good-questions/comment-page-1/#comment-211254 Wang Moli Thu, 15 Oct 2009 14:23:14 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/?p=4062#comment-211254 Do people really not know the answers to the questions they ask? Most of the time in our adult life when we ask a question, we already know the answer. Q: Why did you do that? Q: Did you get my email? (Did you get my voice mail?) Q: Is this job for me? Q: Should I ask for a raise? Q: Should I vaccinate my kids? Q: Is my spouse cheating? 99% of the time, we already know the answer. Many times the purpose of asking a question is to force the respondent to verbalize the answer. As an attorney, you learn very early on that you should never ask a question you don't already know the answer to. ;) Do people really not know the answers to the questions they ask? Most of the time in our adult life when we ask a question, we already know the answer.

Q: Why did you do that?

Q: Did you get my email? (Did you get my voice mail?)

Q: Is this job for me?

Q: Should I ask for a raise?

Q: Should I vaccinate my kids?

Q: Is my spouse cheating?

99% of the time, we already know the answer. Many times the purpose of asking a question is to force the respondent to verbalize the answer. As an attorney, you learn very early on that you should never ask a question you don't already know the answer to. ;)

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