Comments on: Feeling special is just as important as fitting in

By: Thoughts on ‘otherness’/ How to emulate Obama « La Vie Quotidienne

Wed, 05 Nov 2008 12:43:04 +0000

[...] Penelope Trunk on Feeling Special Is Just As Important As Fitting In [...]

By: Dale

Dale — Wed, 22 Oct 2008 18:49:39 +0000

Sometimes though one gets so tired of being special…

and having to fit in :(

By: Bob Dobbs

Bob Dobbs — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 19:26:14 +0000

being jewish is not about feeling special, its a responsibility to make the world a better place, as commanded by god "justice, justice you shall pursue" and 612 other commandments in the torah…

you and kids should be worrying about how you improved the world, not how you feel- that is what being jewish is all about

questions? see the torah, and a good teacher. the rest will follow

By: aceofsomething

aceofsomething — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 21:11:01 +0000

I grew up in Madison and while I admit there isn't the jewish community of New York or Chicago but there is a community. In all my years of being a student at Madison schools there was always an awareness of jewish holidays, and I went to the catholic schools!! Perhaps it's less of an issue of a lack of community than a lack of desire to find it. I will not be one of those noble-madisonians who say the city is perfect and has everything anyone could ever want or even think to want, but there is far more community than you give it credit for.

By: Caitlin

Caitlin — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 20:00:26 +0000

As I said before, there's plenty going on in the world markets to affect the US, even when the US markets are themselves quiet.

I have been thinking about this and I would also like to add that it's possibly a bit dangerous to point out that the Jews dominate Wall Street, or indeed that any ethnic group dominates any industry. Some people will seize on anything as a problem and it's depressingly easy to stir up sentiments, especially at a time like this. Be careful.

By: Nancy

Nancy — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 20:03:07 +0000

Nice post.

I think today's religions are more about that sense of belonging and identity than they are about creeds. Thanks to education, we've moved on from creeds. Now what's left is a kind of loyalty to roots.

This is the only way I can explain why wonderful, powerful, educated Muslim women wear headscarves and overclothes. It's not to be modest. (How can you be modest when you make yourself stand out?) It's about marking one's identity and maintaining a sense of belonging to something.

The same applies to religious rules about what you can and can't do on holidays, what you wear, what you eat, and all the little rituals of daily life. All of them are restrictions and inconveniences, none of them logical, but all reinforcing that belonging to the group.

It's the flight from anomie and alienation, the struggle against the organized lovelessness and flatness of Western life.

It's a way of shouting out what we are still human.

Have a very human holiday.

By: Doug

Doug — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 17:35:05 +0000

I'm Jewish, but stopped practicing because I found the religion itself limited most Jews' spiritual development. Most secular Reform & Conservatice Jews view religion as a Hebrew chants, challah, shofars, and other rituals with little connection to daily life. It's one reason I think so many Jews take meds for psych conditions.

I found Penelope's post to be yet another example of how Judaism is just a series of rituals to most Jews, and does little to expand them spiritually. After a big holiday, or any Sunday for that matter, if I ask, most Protestants will share with me their pastor's sermons, and discuss how their clergy's words could or couldn't impact their lives personally. But after Yom Kippur, most Jews will tell me they don't remember the Rabbi's sermon, they slept through it, or that he said something obvious about being good or performing a kind gesture.

If you read business motivators like Napoleon Hill or Robert Collier, much of what they say is very similar to what's in the New Testament. Many Jews feel left out on Christmas, but really what they're missing is not a decorated tree or Santa, but the chance to experience and interpret bible readings that can be applied to everyday life, not just a once a year ritual.

By: Susan Greene

Susan Greene — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 16:01:55 +0000

All these suggestions are fine — dipping apples in honey, cooking potato latkas, lighting candles — but what bothers me is that these are nothing more than fun family traditions. How does all this tie into Judaism as a religion? What is the significance?

More importantly, how does this teach our children to be better people? Isn't that what the focus of religion should be?

By: Mark F.

Mark F. — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 15:52:34 +0000

Happy Holidays, you did the right thing!
Chanukah is next and easier because its been watered down by american culture, and coincides with christmas, besides presents you can light candles (make sure you get a nice menorah if you don't already have one, and make it a tradition to light candles each night with your children). Also potatoe latka's are a nice treat, they will always remember something like that. I can still remember the smell of wonderful food as I entered my grand mothers apt. during the holidays many yrs ago…just a suggestion!

By: Dara

Dara — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 15:19:19 +0000

I have always been curious about this and your post just brings it to mind again. Do you view being Jewish more as a race or a religion? You talk about race at the workplace, but then also mention asking off for religious holidays in the same breath. Arabs and Muslims are not necessarily the same thing. Yet, I know some Jewish people who view it to be both…and some who didn't seem to be practicing the religion, but were also Jews. Perhaps Jewish is also unique because of the blurring of lines between race and religion.