Comments on: Send: 4 words that sound nice when spoken, but not in email http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/ Advice at the intersection of work and life Mon, 08 Sep 2008 05:29:59 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.1 By: Chris Peters: Web Developer » Don’t use these 4 words in email http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-139399 Chris Peters: Web Developer » Don’t use these 4 words in email Sat, 29 Mar 2008 16:51:30 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-139399 [...] Trunk wrote an interesting post on 4 words that sound nice when spoken, but not in email. Man, they make a lot of sense too, especially when she explains context. Here they [...] [...] Trunk wrote an interesting post on 4 words that sound nice when spoken, but not in email. Man, they make a lot of sense too, especially when she explains context. Here they [...]

]]> By: nara http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-104720 nara Tue, 24 Jul 2007 12:13:12 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-104720 thats grit thats grit

]]> By: Chris Peters Web Marketer Blog » Blog Archive » Don’t use these 4 words in email http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-75528 Chris Peters Web Marketer Blog » Blog Archive » Don’t use these 4 words in email Wed, 23 May 2007 17:46:03 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-75528 [...] Penelope Trunk wrote an interesting post on 4 words that sound nice when spoken, but not in email. Man, they make a lot of sense too, especially when she explains context. Here they be: [...] [...] Penelope Trunk wrote an interesting post on 4 words that sound nice when spoken, but not in email. Man, they make a lot of sense too, especially when she explains context. Here they be: [...]

]]> By: May 7, 2007 - MTB - HR News Feed - All about human resources http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-72416 May 7, 2007 - MTB - HR News Feed - All about human resources Thu, 17 May 2007 15:18:32 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-72416 [...] 4 words that sound nice when spoken, but not in email [...] [...] 4 words that sound nice when spoken, but not in email [...]

]]> By: Will Schwalbe http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66647 Will Schwalbe Fri, 04 May 2007 10:06:26 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66647 <I>Lots of interesting things to ponder. This seems to be one of the areas where intent really does come through. So when you genuinely mean to be polite, it may well read that way on screen. Part of the problem may be people who use these words when they mean to be anything but polite -- so use them in a sarcastic manner. So I don't disagree at all that these are great words when used politely and that's clear -- but so often they aren't or it isn't. I think "please let me know" is probably almost always okay -- unless it's a reprimand. For example, "In the future, please let me know before you take a vacation day" strikes my eye as ruder than "in the future, let me know before you take a vacation day." Others? I totally agree that "okay" or "fine" from your boss is cold but TO your boss may look borderline insubordinate. "No prob" or "Will do" seem far better. Nice suggestions. And "can you" is a great phrase...I'll have to use that more. Also, I totally agree about the syntax but can't figure out why it looks/sounds so much more polite to have the "please" at the end. It does, though. Any ideas? And the "thank you for your time" at the end of an email is a great signature idea. I'm going to try that. I'll also make better use of "appreciate," an excellent and underused word. Love the "hey" story. Whenever I used to say "hey" as a kid, some adult (can't remember who!) used to say, "Hay is for horses." I stopped saying it...to adults. --Will</I> Lots of interesting things to ponder. This seems to be one of the areas where intent really does come through. So when you genuinely mean to be polite, it may well read that way on screen. Part of the problem may be people who use these words when they mean to be anything but polite — so use them in a sarcastic manner. So I don't disagree at all that these are great words when used politely and that's clear — but so often they aren't or it isn't. I think "please let me know" is probably almost always okay — unless it's a reprimand. For example, "In the future, please let me know before you take a vacation day" strikes my eye as ruder than "in the future, let me know before you take a vacation day." Others?

I totally agree that "okay" or "fine" from your boss is cold but TO your boss may look borderline insubordinate. "No prob" or "Will do" seem far better. Nice suggestions. And "can you" is a great phrase…I'll have to use that more. Also, I totally agree about the syntax but can't figure out why it looks/sounds so much more polite to have the "please" at the end. It does, though. Any ideas? And the "thank you for your time" at the end of an email is a great signature idea. I'm going to try that. I'll also make better use of "appreciate," an excellent and underused word.

Love the "hey" story. Whenever I used to say "hey" as a kid, some adult (can't remember who!) used to say, "Hay is for horses." I stopped saying it…to adults.

–Will

]]> By: tamar http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66533 tamar Fri, 04 May 2007 00:20:36 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66533 I'll be the one spoil sport here. In a society more and more brutal, with deafening vulgarity, I notice with delight when someone says or writes or tap dances or does anything expressing, "Please" or "Thank You." I am too grateful for the break from rudeness that I don't quibble with the occasional imperfect timing or inappropriate medium. Spare me perfect manners and awful behaviors or attitudes. I'll be the one spoil sport here. In a society more and more brutal, with deafening vulgarity, I notice with delight when someone says or writes or tap dances or does anything expressing, "Please" or "Thank You." I am too grateful for the break from rudeness that I don't quibble with the occasional imperfect timing or inappropriate medium. Spare me perfect manners and awful behaviors or attitudes.

]]> By: JB http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66457 JB Thu, 03 May 2007 17:40:42 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66457 What about "please let me know"? I use that all the time. What about "please let me know"? I use that all the time.

]]> By: Erik http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66434 Erik Thu, 03 May 2007 15:18:52 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66434 A problem I sometimes have is when my boss sends an email asking me to do something for him that will take a couple of days. Usually these emails don't actually require an immediate response, but my boss will want to know that I've read the email and am able to complete the request. If I respond with just a simple "Okay" or "Fine", I worry that it will seem like I am not too happy with the request, so I have taken to using a more casual approach: I will usually respond to such a request with "No prob" or "Will do" figuring that a casual approach implies that I'm on good terms with my boss and not upset about the request. A problem I sometimes have is when my boss sends an email asking me to do something for him that will take a couple of days. Usually these emails don't actually require an immediate response, but my boss will want to know that I've read the email and am able to complete the request.

If I respond with just a simple "Okay" or "Fine", I worry that it will seem like I am not too happy with the request, so I have taken to using a more casual approach: I will usually respond to such a request with "No prob" or "Will do" figuring that a casual approach implies that I'm on good terms with my boss and not upset about the request.

]]> By: Alexandra Levit http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66421 Alexandra Levit Thu, 03 May 2007 14:35:54 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66421 You know, I've noticed this about the word "please." I've actually stopped saying it, thinking that it sounds less obnoxious just to say "can you?" I love these tips, by the way. They are things you never think of, but affect your communication every day. Alexandra Levit You know, I've noticed this about the word "please." I've actually stopped saying it, thinking that it sounds less obnoxious just to say "can you?" I love these tips, by the way. They are things you never think of, but affect your communication every day.

Alexandra Levit

]]> By: Caitlin http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66409 Caitlin Thu, 03 May 2007 13:57:19 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/05/03/send-4-words-that-sound-nice-when-spoken-but-not-in-email/#comment-66409 I think syntax has a role to play. "Could you bring donuts to the meeting, please?" sounds better than "could you please bring donuts to the meeting". Worst of all is "please bring donuts to the meeting", which is a command not a request. I agree that you don't thank someone for a specific action before they've done it, and especially not the dreaded "thank you in advance". But you can thank someone for what they _have_ done. I always write "thank you for your time" at the bottom of an email, before signing off. If they've got that far, they've given me their time and I am grateful for it. I think syntax has a role to play.

"Could you bring donuts to the meeting, please?" sounds better than "could you please bring donuts to the meeting". Worst of all is "please bring donuts to the meeting", which is a command not a request.

I agree that you don't thank someone for a specific action before they've done it, and especially not the dreaded "thank you in advance". But you can thank someone for what they _have_ done. I always write "thank you for your time" at the bottom of an email, before signing off. If they've got that far, they've given me their time and I am grateful for it.

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