Comments on: Don’t report sexual harassment (in most cases)

By: Danielle

Danielle — Tue, 08 Apr 2008 20:01:35 +0000

Wow this post has been alive for a long time. Since I’m only extending it by a month and I have only been reading this blog for a few months I’ll put in my 2 cents.

I have heard this advice for women before and I think it holds true for men as well. There is a threshold of a number of things below “severe enough to hold up in court” that could easily be handled in this manner.

Remember this is “The Brazen Careerist” not “Do the Right Thing” so her advice is specifically tailored on how to address it with a minimal impact to your career.

By: sam

sam — Mon, 10 Mar 2008 06:03:37 +0000

When I was 19 years old I was sexually harrassed at work by three women. It hurt me greatly. Women do inappropriate things at work all the time. There is a terrible double standard. The quote “he did it to himself” reminds me. When I was fired for talking about what they were doing to me one of my harrassers told me “you did it to yourself”!

By: Cheryl Ahmed

Cheryl Ahmed — Sun, 09 Mar 2008 22:15:42 +0000

Good luck, Michelle. I sincerely hope you win. Please let us know how it goes.

By: michelle hayes

michelle hayes — Sat, 08 Mar 2008 01:16:09 +0000

win or lose …you have to do what you feel is right , sue the company or walk away

you are the one who has to live with your actions

i just chose to fight the company i worked for
and if i lose the case , oh well….

K.E.H Camera

By: Cheryl Ahmed

Cheryl Ahmed — Thu, 28 Feb 2008 09:37:12 +0000

To Big:
No one thinks that it is condoning; it is just reality that if you complain, the only person who will get hurt is you. As far as going to the police, well, I DID go to the police–three times. Which is how I ended up arrested on false charges. It turned out the police were being sued by their female officers for sexual harassment, and I walked in thinking they would protect me. So to teach me a lesson, they handcuffed me and took me to jail in front of my harassers to humiliate me. I lost my job, nearly lost my house, and now I have a criminal record. I have a very hard time finding work. There is no taking the police to court; they fabricate evidence, destroy the real evidence, and the judge ALWAYS sides with them.
Sexual harassers will ALWAYS falsley accuse the victim in order to discredit her, and it will usually have a permanent effect on her career and reputation.

By: big dick

big dick — Sat, 09 Feb 2008 09:23:47 +0000

wait wait. i understand, retaliation and i understand where you are coming from but i held out until i was fired because i did not go ahead and give some dude who was my supervisor blow jobs. seriously, i should have in the month i worked at this place, a job i loved, should have called the police. wtf are you condoming here? abuse? if it gets too weird then something needs to be done. if a person is all right with such abuse then that is up to them and i get the fear but this kind of stuff can really hurt people, both parties. one thinks its ok and progresses or keeps on and the other does not think its ok. there is a time to really find a moral compass again and i hope people reading what i have just wrote find their strength in doing what they need to do even if they are scared. honestly, this is the only way that people eventually are scared back enough to behave themselves on the job. i mean, who are you lady? are you some kind of prostitute to you labor? cmon cause prostitutes have choices even more than you do and probably make more money without the taxes. this site has made me kind of sick and i bet you feel sick for putting up with what you feel you have to do. basically and up front, you are sending the wrong message at this time and eventually in time people will see thru your denial.

By: Bill Cammack

Bill Cammack — Sun, 03 Feb 2008 14:20:37 +0000

@Chris: I don’t think the article was written to suggest that only women are victims of sexual harassment. It just so happens that it was written BY a woman, and her first paragraph says “having a plan to deal with the problem is a good idea for all women”. The replies have followed in line with the original article.

Having said that, if you’d like to contribute along the lines of males being sexually harassed in the workplace, I’m sure the ‘group’ would be willing to discuss your comments.

By: Chris

Chris — Sun, 03 Feb 2008 06:23:13 +0000

Why does the way this article was written suggest that only women are victims of sexual harassment?

By: Cheryl Ahmed

Cheryl Ahmed — Sun, 27 Jan 2008 16:32:13 +0000

Speaking from personal experience, I would have to agree that reporting harassment is only likely to result in retaliation. Employers will only try to find ways to get rid of you, including falsely accusing you in order to have an excuse to fire you and protect themselves.
In most cases, harassment cannot be proved in court. Even coworkers who have witnessed it will suddenly say they can’t remember it. Furthermore, sexual harassment (at least in Massachusetts) is only covered in certain circumstances. For example, the company must have at least 12 employees to be covered. So if a woman is working for a small company, she will not be allowed to file. Also, if a woman is a contractor working on a building project with other contractors, and the male contractors are harassing her, she cannot file. Cab drivers are exempt from sexual harassment law and are legally permitted to humiliate and degrade female cabbies. If a woman is being harassed by someone who does not work for her company, it is legal–for example, if a woman is being harassed by the bus driver while a passenger on the bus.

By: Patrick KIlhoffer

Patrick KIlhoffer — Thu, 29 Nov 2007 20:25:38 +0000

In this day of everyone having a cell phone, I would think this would be less of a problem. If he calls you into his office and he is standing there in his underwear, take a picture. If a guy is harrassing you constantly, make a recording. I’m guessing that would end the problem right there.