Comments on: Women who are not my role models http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/ Advice at the intersection of work and life Thu, 09 Feb 2012 10:17:16 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v= By: mamasmouth.com :: Investors fund mostly men, which is fine for women :: http://www.mamasmouth.com http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/comment-page-1/#comment-265826 mamasmouth.com :: Investors fund mostly men, which is fine for women :: http://www.mamasmouth.com Mon, 12 Dec 2011 06:27:56 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/#comment-265826 [...] doing a great job. She also has two young kids, and a husband who works at a startup. I think you’d be really hard-pressed to find a mom with two young kids who wants Sandberg’s life. Which is why women are not [...] [...] doing a great job. She also has two young kids, and a husband who works at a startup. I think you’d be really hard-pressed to find a mom with two young kids who wants Sandberg’s life. Which is why women are not [...]

]]> By: Stop Telling Women To Do Startups | Bitmag http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/comment-page-1/#comment-265754 Stop Telling Women To Do Startups | Bitmag Sun, 11 Dec 2011 21:44:04 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/#comment-265754 [...] doing a great job. She also has two young kids, and a husband who works at a startup. I think you’d be really hard-pressed to find many moms with two young kids who wants Sandberg’s life. Which is why women are not [...] [...] doing a great job. She also has two young kids, and a husband who works at a startup. I think you’d be really hard-pressed to find many moms with two young kids who wants Sandberg’s life. Which is why women are not [...]

]]> By: Stop Telling Women To Do Startups | Diseño web económico http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/comment-page-1/#comment-265725 Stop Telling Women To Do Startups | Diseño web económico Sun, 11 Dec 2011 16:04:36 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/#comment-265725 [...] doing a great job. She also has two young kids, and a husband who works at a startup. I think you’d be really hard-pressed to find many moms with two young kids who wants Sandberg’s life. Which is why women are not [...] [...] doing a great job. She also has two young kids, and a husband who works at a startup. I think you’d be really hard-pressed to find many moms with two young kids who wants Sandberg’s life. Which is why women are not [...]

]]> By: Stop Telling Women To Do Startups http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/comment-page-1/#comment-265709 Stop Telling Women To Do Startups Sun, 11 Dec 2011 14:55:28 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/#comment-265709 [...] doing a great job. She also has two young kids, and a husband who works at a startup. I think you’d be really hard-pressed to find many moms with two young kids who wants Sandberg’s life. Which is why women are not [...] [...] doing a great job. She also has two young kids, and a husband who works at a startup. I think you’d be really hard-pressed to find many moms with two young kids who wants Sandberg’s life. Which is why women are not [...]

]]> By: anon http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/comment-page-1/#comment-263647 anon Tue, 25 Oct 2011 23:54:00 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/#comment-263647 To some people, it isn't work that means "giving up everything."  It's motherhood. Being an expert in artificial intelligence is not somehow missing out on life -- it IS life. To some people, it isn't work that means "giving up everything."  It's motherhood. Being an expert in artificial intelligence is not somehow missing out on life — it IS life.

]]> By: Career Guru Penelope Trunk: Founder of Brazen Careerist : The Next Women http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/comment-page-1/#comment-182734 Career Guru Penelope Trunk: Founder of Brazen Careerist : The Next Women Thu, 19 Mar 2009 09:38:16 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/#comment-182734 [...] post on your blog is on women who are not your role models. Are there any that you do [...] [...] post on your blog is on women who are not your role models. Are there any that you do [...]

]]> By: Laocoon142 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/comment-page-1/#comment-181794 Laocoon142 Tue, 03 Mar 2009 19:38:46 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/#comment-181794 No, this is not what boomers view as success. The skill sets are different for being successful in business vs. being successful in raising a family. The choices are hard. Providing financially, including having health insurance and some protection against bankruptcy, or having a life with more "time" for one's children while coping with the frustrations of one's own inadequacy when the bills can't get paid or when the children can't have what they need (and I mean, need, for their development, their education, and their health). I suggest that some of these posters take another look at the financial risks that are imposed on households today vs. the financial risks to households in earlier decades. I think you will see that more risk and responsibility is being shoved down to individuals and households. Boomers have learned that there is no one who will bail anyone out and we have defined success as making tough choices to try to ensure our future economic security. It's not about consumption. No, this is not what boomers view as success. The skill sets are different for being successful in business vs. being successful in raising a family. The choices are hard. Providing financially, including having health insurance and some protection against bankruptcy, or having a life with more "time" for one's children while coping with the frustrations of one's own inadequacy when the bills can't get paid or when the children can't have what they need (and I mean, need, for their development, their education, and their health). I suggest that some of these posters take another look at the financial risks that are imposed on households today vs. the financial risks to households in earlier decades. I think you will see that more risk and responsibility is being shoved down to individuals and households. Boomers have learned that there is no one who will bail anyone out and we have defined success as making tough choices to try to ensure our future economic security. It's not about consumption.

]]> By: Amy http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/comment-page-1/#comment-149786 Amy Thu, 03 Jul 2008 10:30:51 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/#comment-149786 I already decided if I'm not married and my buns & oven are not working when I turn 40, I'm adopting an older foster kid, like 7 or 8. Those kids are looking for a loving, stable home environmen and I think I can provide them that. That's why I'm not against transracial adoption or gay/lesiban couples adopting foster kids. I already decided if I'm not married and my buns & oven are not working when I turn 40, I'm adopting an older foster kid, like 7 or 8. Those kids are looking for a loving, stable home environmen and I think I can provide them that. That's why I'm not against transracial adoption or gay/lesiban couples adopting foster kids.

]]> By: Lisa http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/comment-page-1/#comment-136916 Lisa Fri, 29 Feb 2008 22:36:44 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/#comment-136916 Someone I don't respect is Sally Krawcheck. I work for Citigroup, and when she gave a speech to my Associate class, she said she was a great CFO but a terrible mother and wife. She shrugged it off - "you can't have everything." Not a woman to be admired from my perspective. Someone I don't respect is Sally Krawcheck. I work for Citigroup, and when she gave a speech to my Associate class, she said she was a great CFO but a terrible mother and wife. She shrugged it off – "you can't have everything." Not a woman to be admired from my perspective.

]]> By: Jake McKee http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/comment-page-1/#comment-107980 Jake McKee Sat, 15 Sep 2007 06:03:37 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/10/17/women-who-are-not-my-role-models/#comment-107980 Penelope, thanks for starting such a great conversation. It's a fantastic discussion, and one of the best comment threads I've read on a blog in a long time. SJ said: "you rarely hear someone chide men for putting off fatherhood, or worse, pursuing career goals to the exclusion of children they already have." SJ, if *you* don't hear it enough, let me chide away now for your listening pleasure. I'd say that this gets talked about more than you'd think. The "busy dad" is the subject of many movies, books, TV episodes, and news stories (remember the "Deadbeat Dad" stories? This was about more than JUST not paying child support). Is there balance in the men vs. women chiding? No, not really. But we're overcoming human history of the role of men vs. women, so it's not at all surprising that men and women don't have the same expectations heaped on them. One story that has stuck out to me since the day I heard about it was about CNN's Paula Zahn. A year or so after 9/11, I read interview with where she talked about hearing about the attacks, dropping her kids with someone (nanny?), and rushing to the site to start reporting (she actually hadn't officially started at CNN yet). This was lauded by the reporter and many who shared the story as being the brave Paula Zahn. I was in New York that day and I didn't have kids. I now have a 9mo baby and can't possibly imagine leave her while I rushed off, no matter how career related/relevant it would have been. We knew nothing about what was going on, what was happening next, or how dangerous the decision was. Her story turned my stomach (and still does to this day). I've struggled to understand, in my own head, would I have thought the same thing about a man? Would it have simply seemed brave? Do I have a double standard in my own head? I really don't know, but I'd like to believe that I'd agree that man or woman, dumping your kids and rushing into danger is a horrendous personality flaw. Penelope, thanks for starting such a great conversation. It's a fantastic discussion, and one of the best comment threads I've read on a blog in a long time.

SJ said: "you rarely hear someone chide men for putting off fatherhood, or worse, pursuing career goals to the exclusion of children they already have."

SJ, if *you* don't hear it enough, let me chide away now for your listening pleasure.

I'd say that this gets talked about more than you'd think. The "busy dad" is the subject of many movies, books, TV episodes, and news stories (remember the "Deadbeat Dad" stories? This was about more than JUST not paying child support).

Is there balance in the men vs. women chiding? No, not really. But we're overcoming human history of the role of men vs. women, so it's not at all surprising that men and women don't have the same expectations heaped on them.

One story that has stuck out to me since the day I heard about it was about CNN's Paula Zahn. A year or so after 9/11, I read interview with where she talked about hearing about the attacks, dropping her kids with someone (nanny?), and rushing to the site to start reporting (she actually hadn't officially started at CNN yet).

This was lauded by the reporter and many who shared the story as being the brave Paula Zahn. I was in New York that day and I didn't have kids. I now have a 9mo baby and can't possibly imagine leave her while I rushed off, no matter how career related/relevant it would have been. We knew nothing about what was going on, what was happening next, or how dangerous the decision was. Her story turned my stomach (and still does to this day).

I've struggled to understand, in my own head, would I have thought the same thing about a man? Would it have simply seemed brave? Do I have a double standard in my own head?

I really don't know, but I'd like to believe that I'd agree that man or woman, dumping your kids and rushing into danger is a horrendous personality flaw.

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