Comments on: Forget about asking yourself if you're likeable http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/ Advice at the intersection of work and life Thu, 09 Feb 2012 14:26:03 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v= By: sophiz http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/comment-page-1/#comment-261642 sophiz Thu, 29 Sep 2011 05:49:00 +0000 http://lolindrath.dyndns.org/lolindrath/wordpress/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/#comment-261642 #4 contradicts #5... if you have convictions, you're going to have judgments about them ..  #4 contradicts #5… if you have convictions, you're going to have judgments about them .. 

]]> By: Chris http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/comment-page-1/#comment-257536 Chris Mon, 08 Aug 2011 18:59:17 +0000 http://lolindrath.dyndns.org/lolindrath/wordpress/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/#comment-257536 "Judgmental means to me, not willing to lower expectations or standards in the face of perceived underperformance. If no one was ever judgmental, how would things ever improve? We'd all still be watching b&w television and driving old cars." That's not being judgmental. That's the meaning of integrity. Holding to one's integrity is performing to those standards. Judgmental people spend more of their time blaming others for not living up to their standards than they do actually acting on their standards themselves. "Judgmental means to me, not willing to lower expectations or standards in the face of perceived underperformance.

If no one was ever judgmental, how would things ever improve? We'd all still be watching b&w television and driving old cars."

That's not being judgmental. That's the meaning of integrity. Holding to one's integrity is performing to those standards.

Judgmental people spend more of their time blaming others for not living up to their standards than they do actually acting on their standards themselves.

]]> By: Chris http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/comment-page-1/#comment-257535 Chris Mon, 08 Aug 2011 18:55:03 +0000 http://lolindrath.dyndns.org/lolindrath/wordpress/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/#comment-257535 If it's not immediately obvious, spend more time thinking about it until it makes sense. Quote: "4. Eliminate all judgments 5. Become a person of conviction Hmmmm… how exactly is someone supposed to do both of those at the same time?" #4 can be reformulated as "Focus on results, not blame" #5 doesn't mean being judgmental either, but find out what you are passionate about and gives you lasting meaning at the end of the day If it's not immediately obvious, spend more time thinking about it until it makes sense.

Quote: "4. Eliminate all judgments
5. Become a person of conviction

Hmmmm… how exactly is someone supposed to do both of those at the same time?"

#4 can be reformulated as "Focus on results, not blame"
#5 doesn't mean being judgmental either, but find out what you are passionate about and gives you lasting meaning at the end of the day

]]> By: Chris Hansen http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/comment-page-1/#comment-252738 Chris Hansen Sat, 11 Jun 2011 03:19:33 +0000 http://lolindrath.dyndns.org/lolindrath/wordpress/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/#comment-252738 Judgmental means to me, not willing to lower expectations or standards in the face of perceived underperformance. If no one was ever judgmental, how would things ever improve? We'd all still be watching b&w television and driving old cars. Judgmental behavior (used appropriately) forces people to perform. So what we're really talking about then is the wisdom of experience and introspection to know when to use certain behaviors, and when to shut up. I like your list a lot. It's a good starting point for self-awareness. Judgmental means to me, not willing to lower expectations or standards in the face of perceived underperformance.

If no one was ever judgmental, how would things ever improve? We'd all still be watching b&w television and driving old cars.

Judgmental behavior (used appropriately) forces people to perform.

So what we're really talking about then is the wisdom of experience and introspection to know when to use certain behaviors, and when to shut up.

I like your list a lot. It's a good starting point for self-awareness.

]]> By: Lee Reynolds http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/comment-page-1/#comment-252169 Lee Reynolds Sat, 28 May 2011 23:41:34 +0000 http://lolindrath.dyndns.org/lolindrath/wordpress/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/#comment-252169 4. Eliminate all judgments 5. Become a person of conviction Hmmmm... how exactly is someone supposed to do both of those at the same time? 4. Eliminate all judgments
5. Become a person of conviction

Hmmmm… how exactly is someone supposed to do both of those at the same time?

]]> By: What to do if you think you’re getting fired http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/comment-page-1/#comment-252012 What to do if you think you’re getting fired Thu, 26 May 2011 05:31:12 +0000 http://lolindrath.dyndns.org/lolindrath/wordpress/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/#comment-252012 [...] reminds me of the research about how people who are incompetent but likable almost never get fired. I mean, Melissa refuses to work on my goat cheese startup, and she seems to [...] [...] reminds me of the research about how people who are incompetent but likable almost never get fired. I mean, Melissa refuses to work on my goat cheese startup, and she seems to [...]

]]> By: mariane http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/comment-page-1/#comment-251953 mariane Wed, 25 May 2011 16:25:22 +0000 http://lolindrath.dyndns.org/lolindrath/wordpress/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/#comment-251953 Rob, can I suggest something? it is abt value... the thing we all like the most is to have someone that cares and really... listen... when we talk abt something important... it does NOT matter if you have an answer, actulaly it is better if not / just to acknowledge / if that is so / that you are a searcher as well is enough... and if it is really really FAR from anything you have ever heard or thought of just say wow, that is an interesting/different/unusual/weird/cool whaddeva point of view, would you like to explain/explore/tell me more abt it? and then LISTEN you will have made a friend for ever \ Rob,
can I suggest something? it is abt value… the thing we all like the most is to have someone that cares and really… listen… when we talk abt something important… it does NOT matter if you have an answer, actulaly it is better if not / just to acknowledge / if that is so / that you are a searcher as well is enough… and if it is really really FAR from anything you have ever heard or thought of just say wow, that is an interesting/different/unusual/weird/cool whaddeva point of view, would you like to explain/explore/tell me more abt it?
and then LISTEN
you will have made a friend for ever
\

]]> By: Assech Omega http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/comment-page-1/#comment-248624 Assech Omega Tue, 12 Apr 2011 12:02:15 +0000 http://lolindrath.dyndns.org/lolindrath/wordpress/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/#comment-248624 <a href="http://www.chineseenergetics.com" rel="nofollow"> Energy Psychology </a> this is really amazing!!
Energy Psychology

this is really amazing!!

]]> By: alat sulap murah http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/comment-page-1/#comment-241568 alat sulap murah Tue, 18 Jan 2011 08:20:44 +0000 http://lolindrath.dyndns.org/lolindrath/wordpress/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/#comment-241568 for me being likeable are stressful.. everybody have their different point of view.. after read your article, i pick one i like 1. Be positive.. i will try to always positive Thanks, very helpful article for me being likeable are stressful.. everybody have their different point of view.. after read your article, i pick one i like 1. Be positive.. i will try to always positive
Thanks, very helpful article

]]> By: Bhavany http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/comment-page-1/#comment-227522 Bhavany Fri, 07 May 2010 12:12:58 +0000 http://lolindrath.dyndns.org/lolindrath/wordpress/2006/09/21/forget-about-asking-yourself-if-youre-likeable/#comment-227522 If I asks any one of my friends am I likeable immediately they asks me to first tell about them. Based on that they will tell their opinion. :-) If I asks any one of my friends am I likeable immediately they asks me to first tell about them. Based on that they will tell their opinion. :-)

]]>