Comments on: Your family would be better off with a housewife (so would mine) http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/ Advice at the intersection of work and life Thu, 09 Feb 2012 16:29:23 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v= By: L http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/comment-page-1/#comment-270324 L Sun, 29 Jan 2012 21:37:05 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/#comment-270324 28 years youthful and await marriage. Gaining family and love is more compelling than my B.A. that I'd like to use in less stress environment. Ladies keep your heads up and I hope that you are fulfillied as I klnow being without and simply dreaming can hurt. 28 years youthful and await marriage. Gaining family and love is more compelling than my B.A. that I'd like to use in less stress environment.

Ladies keep your heads up and I hope that you are fulfillied as I klnow being without and simply dreaming can hurt.

]]> By: A http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/comment-page-1/#comment-270314 A Sun, 29 Jan 2012 15:00:30 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/#comment-270314 There is no right way, is there? As a 25 year old female, I would absolutely love to be a stay at home mom. I'm well-educated, and worked in marketing for a bit. I would much, much prefer to get married, work part-time at a beauty salon or a perfume shop, and otherwise take care of kids and a house. But its certainly a bind! Most men, even if thats what they want, are not able to support someone in this economy. And as someone who thinks it is important to marry for love, there are other factors involved as well. Not to mention the horrible potential for physical and emotional abuse. Making the decision to trust someone enough to subjugate career paths before marriage, and nowadays, even after marriage, seems like folly to me. And romance in this day and age is so fraught with difficulty as it is! We all have such high expectations in every aspect of our life, that it seems like something is going to not work, and certainly at some point. But really, working very hard for an advanced degree in something that I'm hoping to barely use? It seems like a waste of time and money, although very good insurance. Strange, strange times on planet earth. There is no right way, is there?

As a 25 year old female, I would absolutely love to be a stay at home mom. I'm well-educated, and worked in marketing for a bit. I would much, much prefer to get married, work part-time at a beauty salon or a perfume shop, and otherwise take care of kids and a house.

But its certainly a bind! Most men, even if thats what they want, are not able to support someone in this economy. And as someone who thinks it is important to marry for love, there are other factors involved as well. Not to mention the horrible potential for physical and emotional abuse.

Making the decision to trust someone enough to subjugate career paths before marriage, and nowadays, even after marriage, seems like folly to me. And romance in this day and age is so fraught with difficulty as it is! We all have such high expectations in every aspect of our life, that it seems like something is going to not work, and certainly at some point.

But really, working very hard for an advanced degree in something that I'm hoping to barely use? It seems like a waste of time and money, although very good insurance.

Strange, strange times on planet earth.

]]> By: OnlineMagazine » Blog Archive » How to know when to leave your startup http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/comment-page-1/#comment-263034 OnlineMagazine » Blog Archive » How to know when to leave your startup Mon, 24 Oct 2011 19:45:56 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/#comment-263034 [...] Marital exhaustion The dirty secret about startup founders is they can’t keep marriages together. Part of the reason for this is they are crazy to begin with. And part of the reason is that you have to be married to your company to do a startup. So divorce rates are high, especially among women, because they are much less likely to have a spouse who is wiling to stay home and keep the family intact. [...] [...] Marital exhaustion The dirty secret about startup founders is they can’t keep marriages together. Part of the reason for this is they are crazy to begin with. And part of the reason is that you have to be married to your company to do a startup. So divorce rates are high, especially among women, because they are much less likely to have a spouse who is wiling to stay home and keep the family intact. [...]

]]> By: MiMi http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/comment-page-1/#comment-262613 MiMi Tue, 11 Oct 2011 20:01:00 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/#comment-262613 Great article,I understand what the author was trying to say. One thing I got from her article was sacrifice, I believe sometimes we forget that in order to build strong family relationships it takes sacrifice and what we sacrifice is dependent upon whats most important to us. I grew up with both parents having careers and somehow they managed to make it to everything i did from playing an instrument to competing in track meets, all after a hard days work. Now that I am married I cannot imagine having children and maintaining a career. I applaud all mothers who do. Great article,I understand what the author was trying to say. One thing I got from her article was sacrifice, I believe sometimes we forget that in order to build strong family relationships it takes sacrifice and what we sacrifice is dependent upon whats most important to us. I grew up with both parents having careers and somehow they managed to make it to everything i did from playing an instrument to competing in track meets, all after a hard days work. Now that I am married I cannot imagine having children and maintaining a career. I applaud all mothers who do.

]]> By: MiMi http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/comment-page-1/#comment-262614 MiMi Tue, 11 Oct 2011 20:01:00 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/#comment-262614 Great article,I understand what the author was trying to say. One thing I got from her article was sacrifice, I believe sometimes we forget that in order to build strong family relationships it takes sacrifice and what we sacrifice is dependent upon whats most important to us. I grew up with both parents having careers and somehow they managed to make it to everything i did from playing an instrument to competing in track meets, all after a hard days work. Now that I am married I cannot imagine having children and maintaining a career. I applaud all mothers who do. Great article,I understand what the author was trying to say. One thing I got from her article was sacrifice, I believe sometimes we forget that in order to build strong family relationships it takes sacrifice and what we sacrifice is dependent upon whats most important to us. I grew up with both parents having careers and somehow they managed to make it to everything i did from playing an instrument to competing in track meets, all after a hard days work. Now that I am married I cannot imagine having children and maintaining a career. I applaud all mothers who do.

]]> By: Happy@Home http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/comment-page-1/#comment-262529 Happy@Home Tue, 11 Oct 2011 01:10:00 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/#comment-262529 Depression and isolation only happen if you want them to.  There are plenty of ways to maintain social skills and self esteam while raising your kids at home.  Play dates, running errands, or a scheduled Mom's day off are all simple way for a woman to maintian her sense of self.  The thought that a man wanting his wife to stay home so he can control her is ludicris.  If he wanted to control her it would start way before child-bearing.  Then to also mention because a woman stays home she will end up obese?!? really do you think she will be sitting around eating bon bons and watching soaps? No more likely running around chasing kids and making sure her house is wonderful for her hard working man to return home.  I would like to mention that I have been blessed with the gift of a husband who can allow me to stay home with our 5 and 3 year old children.  I have a happy an fulfilling social life, and fit nicely into a size eight jean.  So your mis-guided stereotype is embarassing.    Depression and isolation only happen if you want them to.  There are plenty of ways to maintain social skills and self esteam while raising your kids at home.  Play dates, running errands, or a scheduled Mom's day off are all simple way for a woman to maintian her sense of self.  The thought that a man wanting his wife to stay home so he can control her is ludicris.  If he wanted to control her it would start way before child-bearing.  Then to also mention because a woman stays home she will end up obese?!? really do you think she will be sitting around eating bon bons and watching soaps? No more likely running around chasing kids and making sure her house is wonderful for her hard working man to return home.  I would like to mention that I have been blessed with the gift of a husband who can allow me to stay home with our 5 and 3 year old children.  I have a happy an fulfilling social life, and fit nicely into a size eight jean.  So your mis-guided stereotype is embarassing.   

]]> By: Kitejones http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/comment-page-1/#comment-261741 Kitejones Fri, 30 Sep 2011 13:43:00 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/#comment-261741 I was a career oriented woman.  I gave up my job 3 years ago to raise my children- I do not regret my choice.  My husband and I were exhausted and hated life because of the exhaustion while I worked.  Our house was a mess, and we barely felt like having family time.  Now we spend more family time together and our family is closer than ever.  We don't have the nicest clothes or have the greatest material things in life, but kids are only small once and I would hate to lose that time with my children.  I was depressed at first when staying at home because I am very social, but I had to get off my butt and find social networks.  There are a  lot of free networks.  Through those networks, I have a lot of playdates and exercise partners.  I am more fit than ever- I never had to time to work out when I was at work. My days of working were filled with getting kids ready, going to work,commute and then going to bed. I also trade afternoons off with other women so i can have kid-free time for myself.  I am not saying that women shouldn't work.  I am saying that for my family, I had the opportunity to stay home and it works very well for us.  I was a career oriented woman.  I gave up my job 3 years ago to raise my children- I do not regret my choice.  My husband and I were exhausted and hated life because of the exhaustion while I worked.  Our house was a mess, and we barely felt like having family time.  Now we spend more family time together and our family is closer than ever.  We don't have the nicest clothes or have the greatest material things in life, but kids are only small once and I would hate to lose that time with my children.  I was depressed at first when staying at home because I am very social, but I had to get off my butt and find social networks.  There are a  lot of free networks.  Through those networks, I have a lot of playdates and exercise partners.  I am more fit than ever- I never had to time to work out when I was at work. My days of working were filled with getting kids ready, going to work,commute and then going to bed. I also trade afternoons off with other women so i can have kid-free time for myself.  I am not saying that women shouldn't work.  I am saying that for my family, I had the opportunity to stay home and it works very well for us. 

]]> By: LiterateReader http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/comment-page-1/#comment-261722 LiterateReader Fri, 30 Sep 2011 02:25:00 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/#comment-261722 I doubt most men have the capacity to juggle the duties of a house wife like most women can. Have you ever thought that some of these men think so because they know can't do a better job? If a house wife is too stupid to learn how to make her own social appointments with other house wives during the day or hang out with her friends after work, she is victimizing herself and has no one else to blame. The author is giving suggestions based on observations. Had you read the article more carefully you would realize that it is not necessary for the 'housewife' to be a woman if the man is willing; however, the odds of that is slim. The requirement is that someone is needed to fill that role, whether it be the husband, wife or a professional caregiver. Your sweeping general statements makes it quite clear that you have issues with male control and power, and make a poor argument. I doubt most men have the capacity to juggle the duties of a house wife like most women can. Have you ever thought that some of these men think so because they know can't do a better job?

If a house wife is too stupid to learn how to make her own social appointments with other house wives during the day or hang out with her friends after work, she is victimizing herself and has no one else to blame.

The author is giving suggestions based on observations. Had you read the article more carefully you would realize that it is not necessary for the 'housewife' to be a woman if the man is willing; however, the odds of that is slim. The requirement is that someone is needed to fill that role, whether it be the husband, wife or a professional caregiver.

Your sweeping general statements makes it quite clear that you have
issues with male control and power, and make a poor argument.

]]> By: Hobbit http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/comment-page-1/#comment-260264 Hobbit Sat, 17 Sep 2011 01:16:00 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/#comment-260264 People advocating the stay at home wife forget to mention the depression and isolation that comes with it. women are the most social of humans, making them stay at home will cause serious depression mental illness and lead to obesity and other problems. do this: stay at home while all your friends are working and see how you deal with the isolation. men asking wives to stay at home just want to control them, and risk ending up with a seriously obese and mentally damaged wife People advocating the stay at home wife forget to mention the depression and isolation that comes with it.
women are the most social of humans, making them stay at home will cause serious depression mental illness and lead to obesity and other problems.
do this: stay at home while all your friends are working and see how you deal with the isolation.
men asking wives to stay at home just want to control them, and risk ending up with a seriously obese and mentally damaged wife

]]> By: Blueprint for a Woman’s Life http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/comment-page-1/#comment-258929 Blueprint for a Woman’s Life Fri, 26 Aug 2011 18:37:15 +0000 http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2006/08/27/your-family-would-be-better-off-with-a-housewife-so-would-mine/#comment-258929 [...] means that the wife needs to just bite the bullet and maintain the marriage. Stay-at-home spouses keep marriages together more effectively . I know: this is not popular, and not fair, but you do not need to make a crusade out of your [...] [...] means that the wife needs to just bite the bullet and maintain the marriage. Stay-at-home spouses keep marriages together more effectively . I know: this is not popular, and not fair, but you do not need to make a crusade out of your [...]

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