I’m a 24-year-old with a bachelor’s from a top school, currently highly marginally employed (avidly job-seeking) and living on a friend’s couch because I could no longer afford my rent with what I was making. I’ve sent out hundreds of resumes, but it’s so true that a master’s degree today is what a bachelor’s degree was to the Baby Boomers; more than half the postings I’ve seen on Craigslist for administrative assistants (not, mind you, executive assistants) ask for bachelor’s degrees, whereas thirty years ago secretarial work was often completed by those with only a high school education.

It doesn’t help that my brother, only a year older than I am, just finished his PhD from A School in Boston and has already gotten junior faculty offers from prestigious offers, or that most of my friends are enrolled in or about to start graduate or professional school, most at absolutely top-notch programs (one close friend is about to graduate law school with an offer from the top firm in the country for her specialty).

The bottom line is that I’m trying to get my ducks in a row to go to grad school for the professional degree that I want, but that’s no easy feat either. It’s looking like I might have to move back to my parents’ house for the summer (I live thousands of miles away at present) to regroup and keep applying to jobs. Just what somebody wants to do on the eve of her twenty-fifth birthday!

And my expectations aren’t overwhelmingly high; at this point, all I ask is for a job that’s (a) tolerable and (b) pays me enough to live. “Tolerable” doesn’t mean perfect; there’s no such thing as a perfect job — I just want one that doesn’t make me want to get drunk the moment I come home five nights a week. As for paying me enough to live, I don’t need exorbitance. I did Americorps and lived just fine on what I made there, although I wasn’t able to save anything. I’m fine with roommates and an un-swanky apartment, plan on driving my current car until it gives out, have no need for a Wii, love to cook for myself instead of eating out… If I could find a tolerable job that paid me $30k, I’d be in!

But where the hell are those jobs? Or, rather, because I see them every day on Craigslist — why the hell can’t I get one of those jobs?

This “quarter life crisis” has been playing out in my life for 2 years now… Maybe even longer… I am only 26 (just turned in March). I graduated with an electrical engineering degree and an IT degree in 2006. I was confused to where I wanted to go, and took the first job that came my way (due to pressures from above). It was even into a career that I knew I did not want to get into. I have been unhappy for 2 years now, not being able to move out or buy a new car or do what I want to do and getting minimal job satisfaction.

My frustration crept into my everyday life and affected my social life and relationship until my girlfriend decided to break up with me in November (she is going through the same way, just handling it a different way). I tell you that there is nothing like a breakup to but the fire of hell back into the heart. Since then I have overcome my frustrations and decided that I am the only one that can make me happy. So I am finally making a career change into something that I feel is right, and moving overseas to pursue my dreams.

I think a big part of the “quarter life crisis” is “existential angst”, maybe its the same thing, or at least for now it is.

Part of my frustrations was the expectations I had going into the working world, that is absolute freedom (financially and socially) as well as going into a career / job that the company would take certain responsibilities upon themselves, like career development and training. We have also grown up with hard working (and mostly miserable) parents, and I know that I don’t want to be in their shoes, I want to find a career where I will be satisfied 80% of the time, challenged 80% of the time and miserable 20% of the time…

I also think that with all the knowledge that has been accumulated over the past 20plus years we have so much information at our fingertips, and with that so many excuses… We don’t just get on with things anymore like our grandparents, we analyze and excuse. Not that it’s a bad thing, I think its great! Having this experience has grown me into a stronger person, a more driven and motivated soul. I will no longer accept 2nd best and no longer accept a job that I am not satisfied with. I think that employers see this in me as lately I have been offered many great jobs, on totally different career paths, but now come the angst…
What to do? Where to go?

For me, this all culminated in the proverbial quarter-life crisis when I was 23. I had hung all of my hopes on a promising job opportunity at Microsoft when I graduated college, and when that didn’t come through, I wound up working a horrible job for a small company in my hometown. They underpaid me horribly and generally treated me like crap. I finally got sick of it, gave notice, and decided that I had always enjoyed cooking, so I was determined to find a job in a gourmet restaurant. I guess it was one of those ‘find out now or regret it forever’ moments that many of my generation seem to be willing to pursue.

Now, after almost four years of grueling (but rewarding) labor in kitchens, I feel like I have finally started to receive the education that I paid so much for in college. The difference is the relationships built and especially the mentoring that occurs in the kitchen. I feel like this is the most lacking aspect of the education received by my generation. Most college education has become so impersonal that there is little chance of picking up anything more than the bare technical skills in a field of study, which is hardly enough in the real world.

After four years in kitchens, I generally feel much more prepared to pursue any career I may chose in the future (provided I ever tire of cooking).

I think an educational (not to mention parenting) model that focused more on mentoring would alleviate much of the potential job-angst of the upcoming generation. I also think that is a tall order to fill, considering the ratio of students to teachers is only getting worse, which is a tremendous shame.

Generations before us didn’t have the priviledge to hit this point of discontentment and dwell on it because they had families to worry about. Majority of my peers don’t have a reasonable prospect to even consider marriage and/or a family. So what else do you have left at this point? Your career which unfortunately is a huge part of your life. Fulfillment is and should be number one. Having a career is far different from just obtaining a job. I just want those out there who feel HIGH EXPECTATIONS is the problem, you’re absolutely wrong.

Thank you so much for letting me know that i’m not insane (lol). I am now better equipped to deal with my emotions and move to the next stage.

Thank you for the advice. I am sure, you are right, that my new co-worker has never had to think on his feet, and I am sure the fact that he is the owner’s nephew doesn’t hurt. I do notice that he spends a lot of time getting sidetracked on Instant messaging and personal calls, and if it doesn’t come easy, he gets stuck. This is certainly a different group, but I am working on staying as patient as I can and repeating the same things each day, hoping that eventually, things will sink in… I am curious to see how the office dynamics work out since most of the office staff is in their 50’s.

* * * * *

Hi, Kelly.
Where you fit is that you are Generation X and we did not have quarterlife crises for many reasons but the biggest one is that, as you show in this comment, our whole life was a crisis — we were raised as very independent kids (most say more neglected than independent) and we graduated into a horrendous job market.

I caution you, though, about complaining about a young person being unlike you. If a young person does not have your independence and fast thinking on your feet it might be because he never had to. But you can bet that he’s better at working on teams than you are. He’s been raised to do that and you haven’t. We each have our strengths.

And, anyway, I’m not so convinced that independence is a strength that’s so important….

Penelope